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Becky J
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 1:06pm | IP Logged
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Thanks, everyone, who commented on my recent posts on exercising and losing weight after pregnancy!
For months now, I have been jotting down my thoughts about how I had to change my attitude towards eating in order to try to lose weight. I had a chance to flesh out those thoughts in writing this week, as I got back on the Weight Watchers Point-counting wagon. Here's what I came up with. I would love to hear anyone's comments on or additions to the list!
Thanks!
Becky J
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My rules for dieting (April 2010)
Beverages are the enemy of weight loss.
A few months ago, my mom, while visiting, said, "I've never seen someone who likes as many different kinds of drinks as you do!" My particular weakness is iced coffee drinks from McDonald's, Starbucks, Peet's, Burger King, etc. You name it, I've tried it and loved it! So now I am trying to be very watchful of what I slurp down everyday.
I hate the words "portion control" but I know I need to adopt that mindset. I hate the idea of measuring out every little jot and tittle of food as implied by the term "portion control". But I am starting to get the concept: Why do I need 8 chips when 4 chips is perfectly fine and "costs" me half the Points? Why do I need to have a whole donut if half a donut satisfies my taste for a donut? I like the idea that, with Weight Watchers, I don't have to deny myself any food, I just have to eat it in a small enough portion to fit into my Points range. The hard part is having the self-discipline to limit myself to a small portion of the desired food and fill up on low-Points foods like fruits and veggies instead.
Be careful about grazing.
I love to graze & love to pop food into my mouth all day long. But it is too easy to eat mindlessly that way and have no idea how many calories I've consumed on a given day.
Be careful about sampling food while preparing meals for the kids. I.e., no cutting extra slices of cheese for myself or licking extra peanut butter off a spoon.
If I'm going to lose weight, I have to make peace with the feeling of hunger.
I really hate the gnawing, distracting feeling of hunger. But I am starting to realize that if I am going to lose weight, I am going to have to get comfortable with hunger, not treat it like an emergency, and learn to ignore it if for some reason I can't satisfy it. Since my pregnancy last year, I've treated hunger like an emergency I had to attend to right away, no matter where I was. This approach lead me into eating a lot of food I could get "on the fly", food that"s more of an impediment to weight loss than I'd like to admit. I am now trying to learn to get comfortable with the feeling of hunger.
Diet and exercise may not mix. This is actually one of the more encouraging revelations I've had of late. I have made many attempts over the years to start a diet and exercise program simultaneously. This approach may work if one is merely trying to eat better and not consciously restrict calories. But my experience of restricting calories, counting Points, etc., is that I am too hungry to do dedicated aerobic exercise. I do think I need to get more activity in general. But, for me, at this stage of my life with small kids at home, it seems easier to concentrate on not putting hundreds of extra calories into my mouth as opposed to trying to burn those same calories via exercise.
Fruits and veggies should be the mainstays of my meals. I am by no means a fruit and veggie hater. But let's face it: these are not "comfort foods". They are not always as pleasurable to eat as other food items. And they generally take more time and effort to shop for and prepare, at least if eaten in their healthiest states. (Take fresh strawberries, currently in season. Frozen strawberries taste terrible, so I aim to get them fresh while I can. But that means shopping for them several times a week.) So another habit I'm trying to change in order to start losing weight again is to have fruits/vegetables at every meal, and to accept the fact I need to go to the trouble of keeping them in stock.
In order to lose weight, I have to accept food waste. I once read in a parenting magazine that a diet pitfall for moms is finishing their kids' unfinished meals. I'm sure this is one of the pitfalls that's made it harder for me to lose weight after Baby #3 than after Babies #1 and #2. Now that I have older kids who eat "normal" food, it's tempting to not let their food go to waste - their chicken nuggets, their cheese and crackers, their ice cream treats. I also worry about the food waste in terms of not being able to finish up leftovers or other perishables before they go bad. But I have to accept the fact that if I'm going to lose weight, I can't act like the family garbage disposal!
Eat only what's worth the calories.
I read this advice once in an essay by a restaurant critic explaining how she managed to maintain a healthy weight while eating for a living. I am not entirely sure how to square this advice with the idea of eating what I should and not just what I like. But maybe there is a happy medium, and maybe it's this: for "low-Points" foods like vegetables, I should eat them no matter if I like them much or not. For "high-Point" foods like cookies, I should eat them only if they're worth the Points baked into them!
Avoid the "tomorrow I'll start my diet" mentality, otherwise known as the "Last Supper" mentality. I am generally not a procrastinator. I like to get things done pronto and check them off my nagging to-do list. But I have been saying "tomorrow I'll start my diet" even before Baby #3 was born. First it was, "I'll start dieting after she's born." Then it was, "After my 6-week check-up." Months after that, it was "I'll diet during Lent." Now, it's I'll diet after Lent! Meanwhile, I'd rationalize that I'd have to enjoy everything I could before that milestone and, especially, finish up any "bad" foods I had around the house. I realize now I just have to jump in and diet right this very moment, even if the diet won't be perfect, even if there are still temptations (e.g., Easter candy!) in the house. I need to get past the either/or "EITHER diet OR pig out" mentality that has been keeping me stuck at my postpartum weight.
I can't be oblivious to how fattening some things are, especially fast food. For the past seven months, I have been reluctant to read food labels. I didn't want to face the awful truth of how fattening the things are that I want to eat. So there's been some deliberate obliviousness on my part as well as some plain carelessness. But my eyes were opened last weekend when I shared part of a small Dairy Queen Blizzard with my son and saw that even the smallest Blizzard costs 13(?!) points, about one-half or one-third the Points I should consume all day! And that is the small size and just the ice cream & no burger or fries included. When I think about all the burgers, the fries, the ice creams, etc., I've eaten since my baby's birth, it's no surprise I weigh what I did soon after she was born . . . It's a wonder I don't weigh a lot more!
This is a long-term commitment, not a short-term fix. If a healthy rate of weight loss, no matter the weight-loss program, is 1-2 lbs. a week, than losing 25 lbs. could take me half a year. What a daunting prospect! It's hard to get past the fantasy that I can diet for a few weeks, quickly drop the weight, and then resume my old fun eating habits. I have found in the past that once I lost the weight, I could ease up on tracking Points/calories so rigorously as I tried to maintain the weight. I could just be careful. But it will be awhile before I get to that point. And if, as I suspect, increased age has made this round of postpartum weight loss more difficult for me, it may also make postpartum weight maintenance more difficult as well. In other words, I may have to accept sensible eating as a permanent way of life.
Perhaps I need new, less food-oriented interests. Although I'm not much of a cook, I enjoy collecting recipes, reading restaurant reviews, watching TV shows about food, etc. I'm not entirely sure that those interests are interfering with my weight loss. It's not like I'm cooking all the recipes I collect or eating out at the restaurants I read about. But my interests in restaurants, recipes, and food are probably signs that I am too focused on the pleasure of eating. It's my attachment to that pleasure - my focus on food as pleasure rather than food as fuel - that is interfering with my weight loss.
Sugar-free, low-fat, and other "diet" foods may be a temporary help. There are some diet foods I don't mind the taste of; others I recoil at. But I think these foods can serve a useful purpose in helping a person transition from a less healthy diet to a healthier one. Look at all the sugar-free and lite foods that are part of the Core Weight Watchers program. Are any of these health foods? They are foods I shouldn't probably be eating often, in large quantities anyway. (E.g., soda, jam, mayonnaise, dairy products.) So if I should scale back my consumption of them because I have to eat the less-than-desirable diet substitutes, I may slowly reduce their presence in my diet. That is probably a good thing.
Calories in; calories out. It's just science. Why do we get so emotional about it? I am afraid that if I adopt the weight-watching mentality if I get with the program food will never be fun again. It's not enjoyable to have to watch every morsel I put into my mouth. But I wonder: where did I ever get the idea food was supposed to be fun? And do I have other "baggage" about food -- other unedifying attitudes -- that are getting in the way of weight loss? I think this is something every dieter needs to ponder for herself.
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 1:14pm | IP Logged
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wow.. that's quite a list..
One idea for your liking to "graze" which from what I understand is not a bad way to eat if you're eating good foods.
Make up a plate so you know how much you're getting.. and then during the day you can eat off that plate for your grazing. putting carrot sticks and olives and bits of cheese or whatever it is you want to have that you CAN eat over time.
And one other thought right now.. you need to use the heavy portion control.. the measuring everything at first.. but once you've done it.. you'll adjust to the new sizes and will be able to eyeball them again. Maybe it'll help to think of the measuring as a temporary thing to help you learn the proper amounts.
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 1:20pm | IP Logged
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Another thought.. sugar-free.. as in have artificial sweetners added.. can often be higher in fat.. AND artificial sweeteners can make you crave more, want to eat more. If you can do without them it would be much more helpful.
My 2 rules probably seem overly simplistic.
1) eat less junk
2) get up and get moving
But they usually work for me because my weight is stable.. so dropping junk food and increasing exercise do let me lose weight.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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lovebeingamom
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 2:09pm | IP Logged
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I read a thread on here a little bit ago (I think in the 10,000 steps thread) about green smoothies. I have had for the past 2 weeks, green smoothies for breakfast and the "left-overs" for an afternoon snack, and let me say that my cravings for sweet and salty foods has diminished A LOT. I looooove it!!!!!
It is nice to know that I am getting so many of my fruit/veggie portions in just those two meals/snacks alone. I do however, continue to have a fruit/veggie side with my lunch and dinner.
I have been practicing "portion control" and dividing my plate as such:
1/2 plate of veggies
1/4 plate protein/meat source
1/8 - 1/4 plate fruit, dairy, starchy side, OR dessert
I seem to be rather full these days and not overeating. I try to think about what I am eating and if it will be worth it when I step on the scale.
I am not sure where my mind made the switch over... but I am very thankful that it did. This past week I have exercised all 5 days (M-F) and I am so super excited. Every day is a new day and I think "today I am going to eat well and get moving for at least 30 minutes". I pray this mind-set lasts - I feel great!!!
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DominaCaeli
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 2:37pm | IP Logged
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I really like your list, Becky! My husband and I are serious calorie-counters, and we both have been very successful at losing weight (or maintaining weight) that way. A couple comments on the rules I found particularly relevant to the way I do things:
Becky J wrote:
Eat only what's worth the calories.
<snip>
But maybe there is a happy medium, and maybe it's this: for "low-points" foods like vegetables, I should eat them no matter if I like them much or not. For "high-points" foods like cookies, I should eat them only if they're worth the Points baked into them! |
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I have found that this comes naturally. When I'm hungry and really feel like you need something to fill up, I naturally gravitate toward the veggies because their caloric value is so much better--more bang for the buck.  And when I'm mindful of just how many calories a single cookie is, I have to decide whether it's really worth it. Sometimes it's not; sometimes it is. But making that decision rather than just eating whatever whenever has helped me gain a lot of self-control.
Becky J wrote:
Calories in; calories out. It's just science. Why do we get so emotional about it? I am afraid that if I adopt the weight-watching mentality (if I "get with the program") food will never be fun again. It's not enjoyable to have to watch every morsel I put into my mouth. |
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Ya know, it does sometimes get annoying to count every single morsel that enters my mouth. But my husband and I agree--it's also very freeing to have a whole piece of cheesecake with absolutely NO guilt, knowing that you have fit it into your calories for the day and aren't overeating. When I wasn't counting calories, I would eat more sweets but usually eat them with a guilty conscience. Do you know what I mean? So I have really found that it works both ways.
Also, I want to link to a blog that deals with a lot of the "rules" you have listed here in a really thoughtful way: bearing blog. Erin has indexed her weight-loss journey over the last couple years and handles several of the issues you mention here (making peace with hunger and food waste, avoiding grazing, etc.). I've really enjoyed reading her posts.
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Blessings,
Celeste
Joyous Lessons
Mommy to six: three boys (8, 4, newborn) and four girls (7, 5, 2, and 1)
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Angie Mc
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 3:05pm | IP Logged
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This is an awesome list, Becky  . Thanks for sharing. Spinning off of your ideas...
Drink water - and lots of it (use online hydration calculator)
Use visuals to remember and teach portion control
Planned grazing. Plan on certain snacks at certain times of day (ex: almonds within 1 hr. of waking.)
Don't sample during food prep and don't eat children's left overs.
Eat to pre-empt hunger. (My latest is eat like a queen.)
Exercise isn't mainly about losing weight, but about gaining energy, strength, and mood control. Without exercise, it is physically and emotionally hard to eat well to lose weight.
Pay extra to make veggie intake as easy as possible.
Fruit is God's candy (got that from Theresa Tapp.)
Eat and drink yummy extras only when feasting and only if its worth it - and have a short list of "worth its."
Do what is right, right now. Trust the past to Divine Mercy and the futher to Divine Providence.
Know what you're eating. Eat food in as close to its natural state as possible (got that from La Leche League.)
Avoid artificial sweetners and fats. Learn about natural sweeteners like stevia.
Eating out is a treat. Avoid fast food.
Eating well is a way of life. Invest in the tools you need to make it enjoyable and doable.
Give youself a chance to acquire tastes for new, healthy foods.
Spend money on high impact foods, such as quinoa, avocados, and berries.
Chew slowly.
Avoid junk food.
Don't eat after 7:00 p.m. (or 3-4 hours before bedtime.)
Feast on Sunday.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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JaysFamily
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 4:21pm | IP Logged
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Only eat foods that are packed with nutrition. Try to find a recipe you like for each of the leafy greens, broccoli, etc. Choose sweet potatoes and berries over white potatoes and corn. Choose protein sources that are high in omega-3 fatty acids such as eggs, fish, and nuts. I always try to use a lot of herbs and spices so it tastes like I'm always eating gourmet instead of dieting.
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LeeAnn
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 4:57pm | IP Logged
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Becky J wrote:
| For months now, I have been jotting down my thoughts about how I had to change my attitude towards eating in order to try to lose weight. I had a chance to flesh out those thoughts in writing this week, as I got back on the Weight Watchers Point-counting wagon. Here's what I came up with. I would love to hear anyone's comments on or additions to the list! |
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Becky, I really like your list. It's obvious you've thought about this for a long time and have learned a lot about your weaknesses and have gained some wisdom in how to make better choices. I think you are on the right track.
My suggestion is that we need to make conquering the spirit of gluttony our goal, rather than merely physical weight loss.
As a fellow overeater, I want to share this short article that was really eye-opening to me: St. John Cassian "On Gluttony" It was helpful for me to realize that overeating is a vice; the chief sin that makes it easier for anyone to be open to other sins.
St. John Cassian wrote:
| For it is impossible for a full belly to make trial of the combat of the inner man: nor is he worthy to be tried in harder battles, who can be overcome in a slight skirmish. |
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This has been the most helpful thing by far in all my years of trying to diet, trying to develop the perfect eating plan, and so forth. When we get our appetites under control, then we can make progress in the spiritual life. See the section "Chapter 14: How gluttonous desires can be overcome" for his advice on how to get control of the self.
I love this quote:
St. John Cassian wrote:
| Bodily weakness is no hindrance to purity of heart, if only so much food is taken as the bodily weakness requires, and not what pleasure asks for. |
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We've heard that before, right? "Eat to live, don't live to eat" is a popular mantra. Just eat what is necessary for strength not for comfort or pleasure.
I would also caution you (or anyone trying to develop self-discipline with regard to eating) about the "snack all day" type diet. If you think you will need a snack in between breakfast and lunch or lunch and dinner, then schedule it and stick to that time as a means of exercising your will. Grazing throughout the day may be fine for toddlers and people without food issues, but I haven't found support for the idea in the writings of the saints.
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my four children are 17, 15, 11 & 8 - all now attend public school - we read many 4Real recommended books at home
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hylabrook1
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 5:15pm | IP Logged
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Feeling hungry is not an emergency! Thank you! That is probably my biggest problem with dieting - I freak out when I feel hungry. It's definitely an over-reaction. I know full well that in a short while I will be able to eat healthy, nutritious food. It's not like we are in a famine or a war-torn country where we never know when or where we'll have the chance to eat again. It is not an emergency.
Peace,
Nancy
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LeeAnn
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| Posted: April 16 2010 at 7:08pm | IP Logged
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Here is another great resource, the Rule of St. Benedict Chapters 39 to 41:
The Rule of St. Benedict wrote:
Chapter 39: On the Measure of Food
Mar. 18 - July 18 - Nov. 17
We think it sufficient for the daily dinner, whether at the sixth or the ninth hour, that every table have two cooked dishes on account of individual infirmities, so that he who for some reason cannot eat of the one may make his meal of the other Therefore let two cooked dishes suffice for all the brethren; and if any fruit or fresh vegetables are available, let a third dish be added.
Let a good pound weight of bread suffice for the day, whether there be only one meal or both dinner and supper.
If they are to have supper, the cellarer shall reserve a third of that pound, to be given them at supper.
But if it happens that the work was heavier, it shall lie within the Abbot's discretion and power, should it be expedient, to add something to the fare.
Above all things, however, over-indulgence must be avoided and a monk must never be overtaken by indigestion; for there is nothing so opposed to the Christian character as over-indulgence according to Our Lord's words, "See to it that your hearts be not burdened with over-indulgence" (Luke 21:34).
Young boys shall not receive the same amount of food as their elders, but less; and frugality shall be observed in all circumstances.
Except the sick who are very weak, let all abstain entirely from eating the flesh of four-footed animals.
Chapter 40: On the Measure of Drink
Mar. 19 - July 19 - Nov. 18
"Everyone has her own gift from God, one in this way and another in that" (1 Cor. 7:7). It is therefore with some misgiving that we regulate the measure of others' sustenance. Nevertheless, keeping in view the needs of the weak, we believe that a hemina of wine a day is sufficient for each.
But those to whom God gives the strength to abstain should know that they will receive a special reward.
If the circumstances of the place, or the work or the heat of summer require a greater measure, the superior shall use her judgment in the matter, taking care always that there be no occasion for surfeit or drunkenness.
We read it is true, that wine is by no means a drink for monastics; but since the monastics of our day cannot be persuaded of this let us at least agree to drink sparingly and not to satiety, because "wine makes even the wise fall away" (Eccles. 19:2).
But where the circumstances of the place are such that not even the measure prescribed above can be supplied, but much less or none at all, let those who live there bless God and not murmur. Above all things do we give this admonition, that they abstain from murmuring.
Chapter 41: At What Hours the Meals Should Be Taken
Mar. 20 - July 20 - Nov. 19
From holy Easter until Pentecost let the brothers take dinner at the sixth hour and supper in the evening.
From Pentecost throughout the summer, unless the monks have work in the fields let them fast on Wednesdays and Fridays until the ninth hour; on the other days let them dine at the sixth hour. This dinner at the sixth hour shall be the daily schedule if they have work in the fields or the heat of summer is extreme; the Abbot's foresight shall decide on this.
Thus it is that he should adapt and arrange everything in such a way that souls may be saved and that the brethren may do their work without just cause for murmuring.
From the Ides of September until the beginning of Lent let them always take their dinner at the ninth hour.
In Lent until Easter let them dine in the evening. But this evening hour shall be so determined that they will not need the light of a lamp while eating, Indeed at all seasons let the hour, whether for supper or for dinner, be so arranged that everything will be done by daylight. |
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Michiel
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| Posted: July 21 2010 at 9:00pm | IP Logged
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My rules aren't too profound, but using them, I have lost 7 lbs. in the last month and not really been on a diet.
1. No junk. And do this with baby steps.
2. Eat fresh, eat local, eat organic, eat healthy.
3. Eat what I want, but go by the three bites rule, as in the enjoyment wanes after three bites. Evaluate after three bites if what I want is worth it.
4. A glass of wine, enjoyed intelligently with dinner, can be a daily treat.
5. Spend the bucks on the good stuff, and enjoy a small bit of it.
Water, lots of it, and make it special with a neat new water bottle, or adding some lemon slices.
That's it, so far. Right now, I'm on a crusade to eliminate high fructose corn syrup as much as possible. Increasing whole grains, and also listening to nutrition podcasts while I iron or walk to keep me inspired.
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Michiel
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Topic: My rules for weight loss-pls add yours
