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Paula in MN
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| Posted: April 07 2010 at 4:30pm | IP Logged
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My ds8 has started wetting the bed again. You may remember all the legal issues we went through. At that time he occasionally wet the bed, and both our doctor and the court-ordered psychologist said it was out of fear (he typically did it the night before he had to leave our home.)
He started again about two months ago, and it has been every night. I'm withholding liquids after 6ish, insisting on using the bathroom before 8 pm bedtime, and waking him up around 11 pm to again use the bathroom. He is still wetting the bed. He's been to the doctor and there is nothing physically out of whack.
Does anyone have any ideas?
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 Paula
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: April 07 2010 at 5:23pm | IP Logged
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There is only so much a mom can do.
Make him responsible for it.
We did a "great experiment" when ds was 9 or 10 and still in Goodnights 
Plan was to try for 7 days, and then we reevaluate:
- he went to bed in underwear
-had a triple sheeted-with waterproof sheets between-bed
-and an empty laundry basket in his room.
Of course we still did the empty the bladder thing, remind him to get up and try to go to bathroom when he woke at night-maybe that was WHY he woke at night  , we weren't so good about liquids/drinks after a certain time,
and we were totally, kind, matter of fact, and supportive but...
if the bed was wet he was to go to bathroom and "finish" and strip the first layer off, put it in the basket and go back to bed. And not wake anyone. He only ever used 2 layers and within 3 days it was done. Then we traveled and I worried. But, he has been fine since. If it didn't work after 7 nights, we told him we would try again in a few months. Since he was so old, made him own it and figure it out.
Maybe it'll help?
Even if you only do it while he is with you.
I hope. And I am right behind you with ds's sister who is 7 years and we have already tried once--without such success--yet.
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Becky Parker
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We took our ds to a naturopathic doctor when he was 7 and having the same problem. She said to take him off dairy. After a week or two, it worked. I'm still not sure why but I do remember how happy he was when he finally stopped wetting the bed. It made me cry because I didn't realize, at the time, how humiliating it was for him.
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Chris V
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| Posted: April 07 2010 at 5:45pm | IP Logged
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Gosh, Paula, I don't have any great suggestions; however my Mom and I were just talking about bed-wetting issues (...not within my family, in fact, I don't even have any idea anymore what even brought up such a discussion), anyway, my Mom has done a bit of research on the subject and told me that it has to do with the child's sleep pattern - not when they sleep and wake for the day, but rather, their own "internal" sleep rhythm. ...might be worth doing a simple Google search and see what literature you might come across?
Hope that helps in some way.
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guitarnan
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| Posted: April 07 2010 at 5:51pm | IP Logged
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Your poor little guy. He's been through so much.
I don't have any great suggestions, but you (and he) have my prayers. 
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Angie Mc
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Paula
You both have been through so much.
This behavior is very common, regardless of a child's environment/situation, and I'm glad that your doctor has given you helpful feedback. I really like Anne's practical approach, it is respectful and detached. I hope that something like this, modified to meet your particular needs, will help you both to deal with the practical issues at hand which, I hope, will help to reduce worry.
Praying for you both!
Love,
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Well I know this can happen to a child of divorced parents.. and that's without fear being a factor. And with conscious thought the child is fairly happy and well adjusted etc.
And I also think that sometimes kids bodies don't grow "evenly" and they can go through stages when they're just out of sync and so things like this are more likely.
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SeaStar
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My neighbor's ds is 7 and still in Goodnites.... he is very sensitive about it, too. His mother recently told me that their pediatrician prescribed medication to help with bladder control at night. She has not given it to him yet, because there are possible side effects, but she is considering it.
I will be praying for you and your son, Paula. You have been through so much
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Maria B.
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Paula, my two younger boys (10 and 8) have bedwetting issues on and off. Up until 6 months ago, it was every night. I was going nuts. I did a lot of research online and purchased a bed wetting alarm here. After one week they had stayed dry for five consecutive nights. Every now and then, we have to use it again. Supposedly this is very normal for boys with bed wetting problems. Some advice that has been consistent in all my research: 1. don't get angry (hide your frustration) and 2. don't pressure the child. My ten year old is very self-conscious (As would be expected) and I do my best to reassure him that it is not his fault and that one day he will stay dry. I hate to see him worry about this, but I'm not sure what else to do but persevere and keep giving him hugs! Good luck!
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organiclilac
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| Posted: April 07 2010 at 8:31pm | IP Logged
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It hasn't happen in the last year or so, but before that, my son would wet the bed for a few nights whenever he had a growth spurt. It's like his bladder was the last to catch up. Just another possibility. I hope that you and your son can get through this phase with a minimum of stress!
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Maryan
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Hugs and prayers Paula.
My son (8) still has issues from time to time. It's lessened a lot, but it still happens. He never wakes us up to let us know he wet the bed because he's so embarrassed -- he changes his clothes and the sheet as silent as a mouse.
And he's not going through as much. Hope some of the advice helps.
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cathhomeschool
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We have friends whose kids wet the bed until they were about 9. I guess it's part genetic/hereditary because most of them have done it and none of them have had psychological trauma and nothing is physically wrong with them. They are just hard sleepers with small bladders. So they wear pull-ups every night. My 8yo goes potty during the night every night, but he's a light sleeper. On occasion when he's exhausted and sleeping hard he still wets the bed. So as others have said, I think it's pretty common even when there isn't a trauma. And you all have been through so much! Praying you find something that helps.
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Pilgrim
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Dd(9) still wets the bed. Has only gone 1 month(?) in her life without wetting. I think she justs sleeps pretty deep and doesn't wake to got to the bathroom. There has been changes in life, but things are pretty stable now, and I just think it might be hereditary. I know one of my brothers ocassionally wet until 12 I think and so did dhs godparent's daughter. Hope some of these suggestions help, I think we are going to try the idea of layers of sheets,and pjs nearby to change at night. Great idea! Will be praying for you, I know how frustrating this can be at times for all involved.
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teachingmyown
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You can get underpants from the bedwetting store that are super thick so he won't soak the bed. You can also put mattress pads on the bed, also from the bedwetting store. We did the alarm for my son but not until he was over 10 years old. Your guy is still young and has been through alot. I would just get him the tools he needs such as the underpants and lots of reassurance about growing out of it, and then give it time.
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Molly Smith
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We had this issue with one of my children for a very long time and couldn't find anything non-medicinal that worked. Until one day, he told me that he was waking up a lot at night and I told him that his body was probably waking him up because his bladder was full. It was a light bulb moment for him and he has never wet his bed again. He was probably 10 or close to it at the time of this big realization. I know this is so hard, between the emotional issues and the laundry, and my heart goes out to you and your son.
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Paula in MN
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| Posted: April 08 2010 at 6:32am | IP Logged
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Thanks for all the support and advice.
My son and I read through all the comments last night, and he wanted to try the triple sheet method. Unfortunately, none of us woke up until 4:30 am. He cheerfully changed his pajamas and removed the first layer of sheets.
He shared with us that he is bed-wetting at the other house, and they are getting mad at him and yelling at him. My husband and I have told him that he is not doing anything wrong, and by reading through the comments he knows he is not the only child that has this issue. That in itself was a huge eye-opener for him.
He is very excited to try again tonight. His exact words were "only 6 more nights mom!"
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LucyP
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Paula - it makes me so mad that your son is suffering such negative reactions from other people. Thank God that you as his mama, are giving his gentleness, love and acceptance. Someone I know wet the bed every night until he was 16, and he DREADED hearing his mother wake up and start moving about in the morning, knowing what her reaction would be. Praying for your little boy and for you as you help him, and try to deal with what he has to face elsewhere.
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stacykay
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Paula,
many prayers for your ds! and for you, too.
I have nothing to add to what everyone posted, help-wise. Just thought I would also mention I had a ds who wet the bed until he was 9 or so (thinking back, he stopped about the same time I took him out of school and began homeschooling him!)
And, do you remember way back when, a movie which Michael Landon, I think, worked on, as he was also a bed-wetter. I found it! It is called The Loneliest Runner. I think it was based loosely on his life. I remember seeing it on tv. The boy began running, because his mom would hang his wet sheets out the window to shame him, and he would run to beat the bus, before his friends could ride by and see them. Apparantly, Michael Landon had a pretty difficult childhood.
Oh, here it is on dvd. The amazon one is vhs.
God Bless,
Stacy in MI
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Paula in MN
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stacykay wrote:
And, do you remember way back when, a movie which Michael Landon, I think, worked on, as he was also a bed-wetter. I found it! It is called The Loneliest Runner. I think it was based loosely on his life. I remember seeing it on tv. The boy began running, because his mom would hang his wet sheets out the window to shame him, and he would run to beat the bus, before his friends could ride by and see them. Apparantly, Michael Landon had a pretty difficult childhood.
God Bless,
Stacy in MI |
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Oh yes, I remember that movie. There is no way that my son will ever have those kind of memories about me!!!
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Paula
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Chris V
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Paula in MN wrote:
Thanks for all the support and advice.
My son and I read through all the comments last night, and he wanted to try the triple sheet method. Unfortunately, none of us woke up until 4:30 am. He cheerfully changed his pajamas and removed the first layer of sheets.
He shared with us that he is bed-wetting at the other house, and they are getting mad at him and yelling at him. My husband and I have told him that he is not doing anything wrong, and by reading through the comments he knows he is not the only child that has this issue. That in itself was a huge eye-opener for him.
He is very excited to try again tonight. His exact words were "only 6 more nights mom!"
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Paula, Bless your boy's precious, sweet heart! He sounds like quite a young man! And you are quite the Mama !
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Serious bed wetting issues
