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10 Bright Stars Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 16 2006 Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline Posts: 728
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Posted: March 11 2010 at 3:34pm | IP Logged
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I don't know if this is the right forum for this question or not, but do you all have any tips for motivating a 5th grade boy? This year my son is just NOT interested in school. I can spend hours and hours just trying to get him through a math page! It is really frustrating and I am getting increasingly concerned that he will not be able to advance to the next grade since he is moving SOOOOO slowly. When he does do work, he is a bright and capable boy, but it is the getting him to DO it that is so hard. He also seems to have trouble retaining the info. due to lack of attention. When he reads his history for example, he can't really tell me what he read. Today, I tried to work with him and had him read the same three pages over and over again until he could actually answer a question I asked him or tell me something about it. When he did tell me, it was all wrong and it was obvious he hadn't paid any attention at all! I have tried the, "your gonna get the dinner dishes tonight if you don't hurry up and get your work done!" route but he doesn't really mind washing dishes, enjoys the bubbles and such, so that doesn't really work. I have tried the "aren't you gonna be embarrased when Johnny, (his cousin) moves up to the 6th grade and you have to stay in the 5th grade since you won't be able to handle the 6th grade work???. Nope. He could care less. Not having the time to come up with a lot of fancy bells and whistles just for him (I do still read him things here and there since that is the only way I trust he is actually possibly getting it in his head and I also work him through his math problems. "o.k., now what do you do? Yep, that's right, carry the 2, now add it...." But, I have 9 children and frankly, I think he is old enough to do this on his own as far as classwork with my teaching him new concepts that need to be discussed etc.
I have also had Dad do night school with him on occassion and he doesn't care about having to do that either. So, I guess I am out of threats and he just doesn't care AT ALL. He does read a lot lately, "The Hobbit" and "A Christmas Carol", so he can read on a good level, but I don't like the amount of work that he is accomplishing. I think he seemed more mature in this area last year.
So, I was thinking about some sort of motivational program for him. I don't know if that is a good idea though. Bribing him with a toy or trip to the candy store or something, but frankly, I am at my wits end with him. He is a sweet boy in most other areas; helpful with the baby, does the dishes well (he's in charge of pots) like I mentioned, but when we get into the classroom, he just shuts down as far as being productive. Sometimes I will think he is working and he is actually making cootie catchers and he will have a huge pile of them, evidence that he has been working at that for awhile while I am working with a sibling. Or, he will gleefully look through his art book but he is supposed to be working on math or something else at the time. It is always everything except what he HAS to be working on. Suggestions??? Normal???
__________________ Kim married to Bob (22y)
Mom of 11 blessings:
Bobby 19, David 17, Noah 14,
Mary 12, Gracie 10,
Isabelle and Sophia 8,
Gabrielle 6,
William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
Online Status: Offline Posts: 12234
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Posted: March 11 2010 at 3:39pm | IP Logged
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It sounds like you're doing a lot of writing and reading work.. if he's more an auditory learner that could play into his not being able to tell you about something he's read.
I find that physical exercise helps my son quite a lot.. and it can be used for helping to transition to something else (run to the end of the road and back) or a "carrot" when that math page is done you have 15 minutes to throw the lacrosse ball around out back. Or even as discipline.. If you're fighting with your sister, you must have too much energy.. do 5 push ups.
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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10 Bright Stars Forum All-Star
Joined: Nov 16 2006 Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline Posts: 728
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Posted: March 12 2010 at 8:05am | IP Logged
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Too funny. I am on another mom's group online and get daily digests. The digest post of one of the mom's this morning was :can you help me with my 5th grade boy!" Must be something about this age.
__________________ Kim married to Bob (22y)
Mom of 11 blessings:
Bobby 19, David 17, Noah 14,
Mary 12, Gracie 10,
Isabelle and Sophia 8,
Gabrielle 6,
William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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JodieLyn Forum Moderator
Joined: Sept 06 2006 Location: Oregon
Online Status: Offline Posts: 12234
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Posted: March 12 2010 at 11:43am | IP Logged
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I see I wasn't clear again. It's not just about the release of energy. But really after a short run my son has better focus for doing school work. It helps him be better all the time not just in using up energy.
__________________ Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Michaela Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 25 2005 Location: Washington
Online Status: Offline Posts: 2052
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Posted: March 12 2010 at 1:45pm | IP Logged
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Eight Wonders wrote:
Too funny. I am on another mom's group online and get daily digests. The digest post of one of the mom's this morning was :can you help me with my 5th grade boy!" Must be something about this age. |
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I was going to say it could have something to do with age. My son did the exact thing, especially taking ALL DAY to complete one math page. Now he has come full circle again finishing all of his work in a flash.
__________________ Michaela
Momma to Nicholas 16, Nathan 13, Olivia 13, Teresa 6, & Anthony 3
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Michiel Forum Pro
Joined: April 17 2009
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Posted: March 26 2010 at 10:20pm | IP Logged
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This post intrigued me. I,too, have a 5th grader who can dawdle too much and/or rush through everything sloppily just to get it done. Then he gets angry if a) he still isn't finished by 3:00 or b) I make him do stuff over because it was done badly and he a) isn't done by 3:00. If I hustle him along when I see dawdling, he seems to do better. I do see some improvement, so I think it may be the age. But it just might be a case of finding the motivation. I suggested to my son that he wake earlier to get done earlier or figure out how to work more efficiently.
On the other hand, my 3rd grader is not going to be near the scholar that my older ds is. He has a very bad case of ADHD, intolerance to ADHD meds, and I suspect dyslexia. For him, I need to be there with him, guiding him, moving him along. (Obviously, I'm not blessed with 9 children!) What really helps him is to work in little chunks of time on one thing, like 10 minutes, then move onto something else, alternating passive (listening or reading) with active (math games, science activities). After one hour of work, we take about a 30 minute break. He plays, I catch up on housework or work with older son.
It is not a simple solution and it does take most of the day for both boys to get their work done, but it works at our house. Most of the time!
__________________ Michiel
mom to two boys
Landscapes and Portraits
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