Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: GO TO SLEEP....PUH-LEASE!!-new post Post ReplyPost New Topic
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Kathryn
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Posted: Jan 18 2010 at 9:40pm | IP Logged Quote Kathryn

5/10/10: I didn't realize but it's been almost 4 months since I posted this notice and things are NOT improving. Honestly, I'm at my wit's end and struggling greatly with this little one's sleep habits.

For the most part, I try not to have her nap (which of course greatly disturbs any schooling) but then she's asleep (sometimes passed out) between 6-7 pm. She actually usu. makes it ok without much meltdowns and she will sleep 13 hours straight until 7-8 pm the next morning. The problem of course is the disruption to school and no break for momma during the day from this high energy one but most of the time we manage.

What has me near tears are days like today when she NEEDS a nap. She woke at 6:30 am and was near meltdown stage by 11:30 am and sooo needed a nap. I was torn b/c I knew what would happen at night. Well, sure enough, she feel asleep for a nap at 1:15, woke at 2:45 and it's 9:45 pm and it's been 45 minutes now. She's been up/down, up/down and that's even lying in bed with her dad! She will take at least 1 - 1 1/2 hrs to fall asleep b/c of the nap. Is this normal?! I feel like I pay double the price for a daytime nap with the torture of this night-time routine.

Any advice and/or prayers greatly appreciated. I guess it's normal for a 2 yr old to zap all a momma's strength esp. when she's pregnant. In my ideal world, she would nap at least 1 hour and still be IN BED by 8 pm...even if she didn't sleep but would stay there. My other two kiddos never did this.



OP:I'm sure this topic has been addressed many times, but well, please oblige me. My almost 2 1/2 yr old finally decided to climb out of her crib last month. She's been in our room since birth and been completely content, until now. So, we finally moved her into a toddler bed in her sister's room a week ago and she won't STAY IN BED or GO TO SLEEP! Actually when she was in a crib and she went down for a nap (which is about the only time I can homeschool my son) and/or bedtime, she always layed back there and just chattered away for a time until she fell asleep. Now that she has the freedom to get up and out, off she goes. She's keeping both her siblings awake, it's difficult to get her to nap and yet no way can she give those up and by bedtime, it's the same ole routine. Plus she's waking during the night too again (although that could be her 2 yr molars) and again, waking her siblings. We're all spent. Is this just a "this too shall pass thing"?   

My older kiddos are 9 1/2 and 11 now so it's been a while since I went thru this. Today I only let her nap 1 hr (which she used to go 2-3 hrs even 1-2 months ago) and then we went straight outside since it was so nice and she ran and played and then came inside and played some more. Lights out at 8:45 and she's STILL awake almost an hour later as well as her big siblings and then that just throws everybody out of sleep for the morning. My husband and I just even spent the past hour alternating right next to her bed to help her fall asleep and it's NOT working. HELP?!?!?!



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JodieLyn
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Posted: Jan 18 2010 at 9:47pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

I had one who would "play off" anyone anywhere near to help him stay awake. The only thing we found that finally worked was putting him in a room by himself. It was way way down on my list of how I want to do this.. but.. he only cried because he was mad and fell asleep on the floor while crying (we're talking under 20 min so not huge amounts of time). Second night was about half of the first.. and that was pretty much the last time we had difficulty with him sleeping.. he'd go to bed and go to sleep after that.

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Posted: Jan 18 2010 at 10:08pm | IP Logged Quote Maddie

Could she need a snack before bed? My 2yo is always wild if she's put down without a little something more to eat. Maybe she burns her calories faster then the rest of them, but some milk and something with protein seems to do the trick. (most of the time, anyway)

Oh, and when she's having her snack, all lights are low and I try to keep the house and voices quiet. That way she knows it's night time and we're all heading to bed soon. If a movie is on and everyone is bustling about, she wants in on the action.

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Kathryn
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Posted: Jan 18 2010 at 10:32pm | IP Logged Quote Kathryn

JodieLyn wrote:
The only thing we found that finally worked was putting him in a room by himself.


But she would just get up and start playing. I finally had to move her out of our bedroom b/c she was getting into our closet and bathroom and drawers and cabinets and playing in the sink etc. We thought by moving her to her sister's room it's at least "mostly" safe. LOL

How did you keep your guy in his room to not bother everyone else or get up and wander around the room/house?

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Posted: Jan 18 2010 at 10:36pm | IP Logged Quote Kathryn

Maddie wrote:
Could she need a snack before bed?


She did want some yogurt but I just gave her her milk that she didn't finish at dinner. We had only finished dinner about 1 1/2 hrs before that. I guess I could give her that and a piece of turkey meat/cheese roll-up. ?

Maddie wrote:
Oh, and when she's having her snack, all lights are low and I try to keep the house and voices quiet. That way she knows it's night time and we're all heading to bed soon. If a movie is on and everyone is bustling about, she wants in on the action.


Yes, we could prob. be more diligent about the winding down time. Doesn't help that her dad used to always think "winding down" for bed meant playing Tickle Monster!      But that hasn't been the case lately. I think he's getting too old and tired.   

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JodieLyn
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Posted: Jan 18 2010 at 11:27pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

i think he was probably younger. I turned out the lights and it was dark in the room (difficult to see anything type of dark) and I removed anything that would bother me greatly to be played with. No one else in the room to be disturbed. But once he went down he pretty much stayed asleep.

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Posted: Jan 19 2010 at 3:43am | IP Logged Quote LucyP

Maybe yoghurt or something like toast/bread for the carbs, rather than protein? Mine don't get snacks at bedtime, but they do go to bed a lot earlier. My son was still napping at 4, but our 2 yo stopped napping at about 1 yo. They go down at 7pm, and I have heard from other mamas that if a child has issues sleeping later at night, then putting them down earlier can actually work well - maybe like us when we get our second wind?
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Posted: Jan 19 2010 at 10:24am | IP Logged Quote LisaD

Yes, I agree with Lucy. Carbs will start the seratonin uptake in the brain and help her relax. And you might try a much earlier bedtime, especially since she's not napping like she used to. Mine tend to fight the naps starting at about 2 years old, so a bedtime immediately following dinner really worked for us. Full tummy, short warm bath followed by pajamas, and into bed. Mine would fall asleep while being read to, then the older kids would go to bed later.   

LucyP wrote:
Maybe yoghurt or something like toast/bread for the carbs, rather than protein? Mine don't get snacks at bedtime, but they do go to bed a lot earlier. My son was still napping at 4, but our 2 yo stopped napping at about 1 yo. They go down at 7pm, and I have heard from other mamas that if a child has issues sleeping later at night, then putting them down earlier can actually work well - maybe like us when we get our second wind?


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Posted: Jan 19 2010 at 11:14am | IP Logged Quote anitamarie

Kathryn wrote:
How did you keep your guy in his room to not bother everyone else or get up and wander around the room/house?


Baby gate. When we had to do this we used a baby gate across the door. That way he wasn't locked in a room, and could still hear us, and we could reassure him (from a distance) that everything was fine. The first few nights he cried by the gate and fell asleep on the (hardwood!) floor by his door. We'd just move him to bed after he was sound asleep. After that, he decided that the bed was more comfortable. He was about the same age as your little one.

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Marcia
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Posted: Jan 19 2010 at 1:23pm | IP Logged Quote Marcia

Could you consider just going to bed a little earlier yourself for a few weeks/months to get her into the transition? If the house is quiet and things are boring, my kids are much more willing to go to bed.

You will have a quiet house in just a few years, give her the time she needs now.   I find a 2 year old to be very cuddly. I love it.

We tend to lay with our 2 year old until she falls asleep or put her in our bed when she gets tired and then when we come to bed later we plop her in her bed. She still sleeps in our room...makes it easier for me to get to her when she needs us.

Last night I came home from Little Flowers with my older daughter to find my 5 year old and 2 year old asleep in my bed. Dad had read books in there with them until the both went out...then tiptoed away....I scooped them into their own beds and they were good the rest of the night.
Night time can be a super way to connect with the kiddos at our house esp. when dad has been gone so many hours during the day.


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Posted: Jan 19 2010 at 8:57pm | IP Logged Quote MNMommy

Kathryn wrote:
How did you keep your guy in his room to not bother everyone else or get up and wander around the room/house?


Out of desperation one day I figured out how to do this for my littles. I put a child safety doorknob thingy on the knob on the inside of their door. That way the toddler can't get out by himself/herself, and she/he can only get out when I want them to. This trick saved my sanity when #4 was born, and may have saved my relationship with strong-willed #3. Now it just keeps my 1yo safely in her room so she isn't wondering our house in the middle of the night.

I need to add that it didn't take #3 or #4 very long to figure out that that closed door = sleep. At the 1.5yo mark, they would both play quietly for a little and then climb into bed and fall asleep. They cried a little the first few times, but it really was quite surprising how easy they transitioned.

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Posted: Jan 19 2010 at 9:41pm | IP Logged Quote melanie

We used a baby gate for my son when he started climbing out of the crib and we had the same issues. It worked great for a while...until he learned to climb the gate. And he's 5 now, and we still have a terrible time getting him to settle down. If I had to do it again, I would have used a different gate. That accordian style is too easy to climb.

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Kathryn
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Posted: May 10 2010 at 9:46pm | IP Logged Quote Kathryn

I'm still waiting on improved sleep habits for my 2 year old. I posted in update in the original posting.

Thanks,

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guitarnan
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Posted: May 10 2010 at 9:57pm | IP Logged Quote guitarnan

Kathryn, you have my complete empathy. My dd gave up naps at 18 months and it was, well, not too fun. Especially when Dad was at sea! And my son needed a scheduled bedtime!

The high-energy toddlers (who, I'm finding, often grow up to be extroverts, recharging their emotional batteries in crowds) can't stand to miss any of the fun of everyday life. It does seem to take forever (and then some!) for them to outgrow this phase of I-need-naps-but-won't/can't-take-them. It's really, really hard to deal with this loooonnnggg phase of adjustment to a new and improved sleep cycle.

Honestly, I never did figure out what to do with dd. She "rested" for a while and then played quietly during naptime when she was younger. Eventually we just gave up and toughed out the year or so when she was super-sleepy at dinnertime.

She is still (at age 12) very high-energy. She can dance for hours and then stay up half the night at a sleepover. One thing that she can do that is helpful, however, is notice when she needs a nap or early bedtime, and head off to sleep. (Like tonight.) I don't have to tell her when she needs extra rest. She knows.

I will pray for you! Having a high-energy toddler is almost harder than having a no-nap newborn.

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Posted: May 10 2010 at 10:14pm | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

Oh no Kathryn.

It is one of the hardest things with littles like that.. almost all of mine have stopped napping by 2.. a couple of the more easy going ones have gone as long as 2.5 with regular naps..

but then you fight the.. falling asleep early enough that they think it's a nap and want to get up and play at 9pm.

Since my kids do well with the company of their older siblings.. it has been pretty easy with the younger ones. They go to bed with siblings and all the activity goes with them.

I've been trying to think what else I might have done. And now I remember that I did put my oldest in the pack and play next to me when my dh was traveling. She didn't want to be alone in the bedroom, but I needed some time too. This was a good compromise.. she could see me but I wasn't giving her any attention.. and I was right there so wouldn't let her climb out either.

And generally she'd play a little while, find that I was "boring" and she'd fall asleep. Then when I was ready for bed I'd take her to bed with me.

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