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Olivia
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| Posted: Oct 22 2009 at 12:00pm | IP Logged
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Hi, I'm newly married and have a 1 year old dd and breastfeed on demand. We would like to have more children but no signs of fertility returning. I would like to continue breastfeeding as long as needed but worried my fertility may not return till weaned. Do you think it's ok to try and decrease breastfeeding to increase chances of fertility returning so our family can grow? Or is that selfish? Or are there other ways to increase fertility? eg. I've read somewhere that certain vitamins in your diet could help. I'd appreciate your advice and wisdom 
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Oct 22 2009 at 12:19pm | IP Logged
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Welcome Olivia. Fertility return with breastfeeding is a very individual process and some women are unable to delay return of fertility much at all and other find that they don't have a return of fertility until they do wean. My understanding is that it's the middle of the night feedings that have the most impact.
Regardless in discussing this we need to keep in mind that this involves Purdential decisions that are up to each family to decide.
I would council patience. a 1 year old is still pretty small and fertility can start up pretty much at anytime. I know how it is to want to hurry to getting pregnant again. But unless there's something else going on, there's probably no actual reason to hurry.
For nutrition related to fertility, I would recommend Fertility Cycles and Nutrition by Marilyn Shannon.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
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teachingmyown
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| Posted: Oct 22 2009 at 4:50pm | IP Logged
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I hear ice cream is good for fertility!
Really, though, as a mom of eight (so far), I have come to realize that God has a beautiful plan for each of us. You may feel anxious to hurry now, but I would say to relax, enjoy each beautiful moment, and believe that your family will be just how God intended.
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Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Oct 22 2009 at 5:10pm | IP Logged
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Another thought that came to me. Don't do anything you'd regret if you didn't get pregnant or if you did get pregnant and had a miscarriage. Weaning a child so that you could get pregnant could backfire and all you'd end up with is a child that was weaned before you really wanted. And it could still be years before you have another child.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Lisbet
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| Posted: Oct 23 2009 at 4:39am | IP Logged
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I ditto just what Molly said. (Ice cream for fertility??? Good Golly! Finally an explanation for why my cycles return so early!!  ) It is so individual, and you never know what the future holds or what God has in store.
My first 3 kids are spaced exactly two years apart, with my cycles returning at 13 months each time, then becoming pg again at 15 months, after the first three, my cycles, with no changes to how I nursed or mother, returned by 12 weeks or sooner, and pg between 6 and 10 months. You just never know - but, God does!  It's a good practice in trust! :)
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Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
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Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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LLMom
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| Posted: Oct 23 2009 at 6:46am | IP Logged
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Olivia,
If you are young, there are probably plenty of years left to try. Enjoy that sweet baby.
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Lisa
For veteran & former homeschool moms
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florasita
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| Posted: Oct 23 2009 at 12:17pm | IP Logged
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I watched 18 kids and counting on tues. and Michele claims she breastfeeds I've tandem nursed and concieved twice while doing so .
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stacykay
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| Posted: Oct 23 2009 at 10:58pm | IP Logged
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I never conceived while nursing until I got pregnant with our last babe when #5 was just shy of 2 years. Two others were quite voracious nursers, too. 
I was wondering, too, about Michele Duggar, and must have seen the same episode where she said she nursed her babes. I was really surprised.
My boys are pretty spread out, but they do seem a little grouped (21 and almost! 19, 14 and 11, and almost!8 and 5.) They, for the most part, get along very well with each other and are quite close. I can't imagine it any different.
God Bless,
Stacy
p.s. If ice cream did work, at least for me, I could have hosted "18 and counting!"  Now I don't eat sugar, but that's another topic!
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Lisbet
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I am certainly believe that Michelle Duggar nurses her babies.
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Lisa, wife to Tony,
Mama to:
Nick, 17
Abby, 15
Gabe, 13
Isaac, 11
Mary, 10
Sam, 9
Henry, 7
Molly, 6
Mark, 5
Greta, 3
Cecilia born 10.29.10
Josephine born 6.11.12
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Olivia
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| Posted: Oct 24 2009 at 5:54am | IP Logged
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Thanks for all your comments. My husband and I would love to have a very large family, as many as God wants we're really inspired when we read about your families with so many children, and we would like to be just like you..
So since my baby is not showing any signs of detachment from breast milk, it seemed like it can take another year before my fertility can come back, and for this reason, we thought it might be a good idea to be proactive about it and try and cut down on the feeds, rather than leaving it up to the baby to decide when to stop. But we agree with all of you, after we read your comments, we've decided to leave it up to God as it's better for the baby to wean naturally, even if takes another year.
The other reason why we thought it is ok to reduce breastfeeding now is because we heard that after 1 year it's not as beneficial anymore, what do you think about this?
Thanks again for all your comments.
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CrunchyMom
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| Posted: Oct 24 2009 at 7:13am | IP Logged
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That is silly, imo. I think that people say that so they don't have to feel guilty about weaning. Not that they should feel guilty if making a prudential choice for their family, but it reminds me of when doctors told mothers that formula was superior to breastmilk, which we know is simply false. Breastfeeding is certainly beneficial in many, many ways, physically and emotionally, past one year. Extended Breastfeeding Fact Sheet
My first two are 2 years apart and 2 and 3 are 27 months apart. I never had a cycle between 1 and 2, and I had one between 2 and 3. I wouldn't stress about it, personally, but then, I like my 2+ year spacing. Number 3 is 13 months, and still no signs for me as of yet. Seems normal to me
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Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
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[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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JodieLyn
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Oh let me think about it as I get more awake.. Never mind the quote I wanted is in Lindsay's link.. go there and read it.. makes much more sense than my half awake memory 
Breastmilk past one year still provides immunities from you to the child and is still a high quality food. And you're going to be coming up to the 18mo old falling and running into.. e.v.e.r.y.t.h.i.n.g... and it is so simple to be able to nurse for comfort.  Not to mention that when nothing else works during Mass, nursing usually settles them and keeps them quiet
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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teachingmyown
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| Posted: Oct 24 2009 at 11:39am | IP Logged
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Olivia wrote:
| Thanks for all your comments. My husband and I would love to have a very large family, as many as God wants |
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You really answer your own question with that statement.
Honestly, just love your baby, nurse as long as seems right for you both and trust God's plan. It is the right plan for you! Couldn't be simpler!
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In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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Stephanie_Q
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Olivia wrote:
My husband and I would love to have a very large family, as many as God wants we're really inspired when we read about your families with so many children, and we would like to be just like you.
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While this is flattering and I'm glad to know that fertile families like ours (this is my 6th pregnancy in 8 1/2 years of marriage) are inspiring to some people (rather than evoking a look of horror, which is more typical), remember that God has a special plan for you and that it is SO important to live YOUR life in the present moment. It is a struggle and unnecessary burden to try to live His plan for someone else.
I have had babies who nursed for a long time and some who only nursed for a few months. I have gotten pregnant while breastfeeding and other times after the baby was done nursing. God truly has a different plan for each of us and rather than trying to force His hand, take the advice of so many ladies here and rather than being anxious about the next baby, enjoy every bit of time you have with your little one, while remaining open to God's gift of life.
God bless!
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Stephanie dh 6.01
dd 6.02, dd 8.03, ds 3.05, ds 12.06 at Catholic school.
dd 12.09 at home.
Baby boy due 10.13
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Olivia
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| Posted: Oct 29 2009 at 11:39am | IP Logged
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Thank you for the bf fact sheet, so many points there I didn't know about.
It is wonderful to hear experiences of people like you truly trying to do God's will. We'll be leaving the size of our family in God's hands. It's what I believed deep down, that God can give a baby despite bf, but external pressures were making me doubt my initial thoughts so thank you for reminding me to trust God more!
God bless.
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4Real Forums : Our Lady of Good Remedy and Care
Topic: Breastfeeding and Fertiliy
