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joann10
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Posted: Sept 29 2009 at 11:08pm | IP Logged Quote joann10

when I am not teaching much throughout the day....a 4th grader who is finally reading, but still cannot write a paragraph, an ADHD 7 year old that bounces off the walls all day (literally)--I need some survival techniques, or DH is going to say they need to go to school for the sake of the little ones---

How can I get the 9 yob writing? How can I calm down a hyper 7 year old? How can I do it when I would rather play games, color and read with them all day?--it isn't really enough for the 7 and 9 year olds---they become bored and get into trouble that Daddy finds when he gets home, although he isn't home very much---he is the soccer coach and athletic director at the big kids school (and works 2 jobs)-and hasn't been home before 9pm in days....the big kids are gone also for these long hours....
the house is falling apart---I haven't cooked for just the 5 of us because it seems senseless with everyone else gone....too much tv....I am rambling....I can't sleep....would they be better off in school?

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JodieLyn
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 12:23am | IP Logged Quote JodieLyn

at 7 and 9? ruined? that's pretty unlikely

a project that they can work on when bored? difficult at the moment but in the spring it could be a garden or something that they can pretty much take charge over and has lots of pretty much continuous work.

Start by getting your 4th grade to write a good sentence. Just one, every day. Pretty soon that will be something he can just whip through and go on his merry way.. so then he can do 2 or 3.. and before you know it, he'll find himself writing paragraphs because it's only sentences that he knows he can write and be done with very quickly.

I find that a few laps around the house (or in my case to the end of the dead end street and back) helps to settle my more active ones... it's also a great transition tool.. and I've also taken to giving one of those squeeze balls or a small bit of clay or something to the more active ones when we're trying to work on reading so that they have an acceptable way to move and figit and it helps them focus.

You got me on the cooking for only small kids. best thing I can do is find the healthiest meals that they do appreciate and try and plan those. and at least spread out the other types of meals.

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Angel
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 7:09am | IP Logged Quote Angel

School is probably the WORST place for a 7 yo with ADHD, Joann. Think about how he would do if he had to sit still all day long with only a short break for recess.
So no, you're not ruining them, and haven't you all been sick? It takes a little while to recover.

as far as calming him down.... well, lots of outside activity helps, and to be honest, I think they do need more structure than other kids just because they find it hard to get going on something and stick with it on their own. But "structure" could be as simple as instituting a few 15 minute periods during the day when you will focus on him. Games are good for hyperactive 7 year olds, actually, if he's interested. You can also try to make up (or search out) reading and math games that involve his whole body, or allow him to do anything more physical than sitting down -- writing with sidewalk chalk or chalk on a chalkboard rather than a pencil maybe... Montessori activities in math and reading can be good for kids like that, too, as many of them involve walking around the room to bring stuff to you. (You don't need all the apparatus, just use what you have -- base 10 blocks or counters or acorns or whatever...) A fun thing to do for reading is "command cards". Take a set of index cards and write down a simple "command" on each card, like, "Jump on one foot." Or, "Hug your mom." My dd loved these cards, and they combine reading with action, so they're good for a kid who doesn't like to sit down.

Do your kids have anything they're particularly interested in? They might be more interested in writing about something that really interests them. One of the ways I got my oldest, writing-resistant kid to write anything at all was to say that he needed to write something for his father every week. On Friday night, he would show the edited and neatly written manuscript (usually only a paragraph or two) to my dh. I gave my ds a list of ideas to write about (e.g., a book you've been reading, something in nature you learned about or saw this week, something you did, etc.), just as a guide. If he wanted to write about something completely different -- a story, for instance -- that was fine, too. It got him writing at least.

Also, maybe your 4th grader would like to learn to type so he could use a word processor to write?

I'm not sure any of this is very coherent, Joann, as I'm typing as fast as I can before breakfast... I know you asked about cooking, but -- ack, you don't want to know the meal I made for my kids last night while my dh was out of town!

(Ok, it was pancakes.... with devil's food cake for dessert. Because it was the Feast of St. Michael. And the kids insisted on making the cake at 6 PM. Pancakes was the only thing I could think of for quick. So I don't think it matters much that I cooked. What kind of meal is pancakes and devil's food???)



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Paula in MN
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 7:25am | IP Logged Quote Paula in MN

You are not ruining them! You've been sick!



Every day you have such creative ideas and projects on your blog, and I read and pray to have the togetherness that you have with your kids. IMHO, you are doing everything right.



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LLMom
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 7:26am | IP Logged Quote LLMom

I don't think they are ruined. You are having a very hard time right now. Since you like to read, read a loud to them and then have each narrate.   That is always wonderful because you can cover a variety of subjects. Same with TV. Can you have them watch some science type shows and then narrate to you (or to daddy)? I think copywork is the best way to help dc learn to write. Like Jodie said, just begin with a sentence and progress up to a paragraph. Let dc choose what to copy if that makes it easier. Have them go outside with a nature notebook and find something new every few days to draw.
Not much help about the house and meals when you have such littles. But don't feel bad about easy things like PB & J, scrambled eggs, cheese sandwiches. All are nutritious.

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Bookswithtea
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 8:33am | IP Logged Quote Bookswithtea

For the 9 yob...composing and the physical act of writing are both difficult for most boys this age. What I did with my oldest was to separate the two. For the first year, I set a timer for 15 minutes. He had to copy slowly and neatly onto paper whatever I chose. 4 days a week, 15 minutes a day. Then, one day a week, ask him to narrate something that he has heard, and you type it. This way you are working on both composition skills and writing separately. Plus, the copywork is fairly easy on mom and the dictation thing is only once a week (usually 10-15 minutes tops in front of the computer). And at the end of the year, you have a lovely notebook full of composed printed out dictations and a notebook full of copywork (not necessarily lovely with a 9 yob though ).

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joann10
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 9:05am | IP Logged Quote joann10

Angel wrote:
School is probably the WORST place for a 7 yo with ADHD, Joann. Think about how he would do if he had to sit still all day long with only a short break for recess.


Angel,
I do have this worry that if my 7 year old was sent to school, she would be be kicked out by lunch time--

I like the idea of "command cards". That could get them them reading and moving.

I would rather play and craft all day, it just seems like my 9yob should be having a lot more academics--but he only started reading "on his own" and he just isn't capable of doing much independent work yet. This is so different than the 6 kids before him, they could all read early and by fourth grade were indepentently completing Seton workbooks and doing most of their work on their own---it seems like he is so far behind where they all were at this point.

Montessori certainly has my interest for the 7 year old, but I get so overwehlmed when I start to investigate it, I give up. (I certainly love looking at Montessori catalogs but then the prices make my hyperventilate......
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 2:55pm | IP Logged Quote ekbell

Re writing

You may find the primers on this site worth looking into.    Classical Writing

The material is gentle but gives copywork and practice with narration. There are also picture study and nature study activities which could be handy.








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stellamaris
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Posted: Sept 30 2009 at 5:40pm | IP Logged Quote stellamaris

I certainly do not think you are ruining your children! I have found here that my youngers are "behind" the timetable of the "olders", but in some ways they are ahead. They are more cooperative, generous, and more careful when they do take an interest in something. Each child has his/her own timetable, so if your 9 yo is just starting out in language arts, teach him at that level.   I agree entirely with the copywork idea; it's easy on you and good for him. Some of my boys have really not written much until they were older, but they caught up eventually.

As far as your active child, do you have any exercise videos lying around the house? That might be a more "controlled" option...at least she'd be in one place, more or less.

Do you have enough energy to direct some of the children in making simple meals, maybe while you play a game or color with others? Home economics is a perfectly acceptable course of study!

You are still not well, and it is perfectly fine to focus on taking care of your health right now. We've had entire months, even years, of unschooling here, but it hasn't ruined anyone yet! Try not to heap guilt on yourself...that only makes it harder to rest and recover. Take your B and C vitamins! God bless you!

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Angel
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Posted: Oct 01 2009 at 7:43am | IP Logged Quote Angel

Don't look at Montessori catalogs. I was really just thinking about some of the more active, easy and cheap to implement Montessori activities... like the command cards. Something that Montessori teachers often do is have children bring them stuff from other parts of the room.

For instance, you give a child a number card (say, 347) and have her bring you back that amount in base 10 blocks. Or you play the bank game where one person has to be the banker and give out a certain number in base 10 blocks (in Montessori classrooms it's beads, but at home base 10 blocks work fine, if you have a set).

Or, for instance, when teaching parts of speech, Montessori teachers will put down a mat and have the children bring "nouns" to the mat. Then when they teach verbs as actions and ask them to bring "verbs" to the mat, it's completely evident that verbs are different than nouns because there's nothing on the mat.

For reading, there are labeling games where the kids walk around the room and read labels on everything... or write their own labels and place them on objects.

Anyway, I was just thinking that for a 7 yo with ADHD, if you're trying to incorporate more academics, the more walking the better!

And your 9 yo is ok... Some kids just read later than others. Every kid has his own path to tread, and some kids are just different than others. With kids who are a little different, I think it's really hard sometimes to put up the blinders and not compare them to other kids (in my experience, anyway), but it's even more necessary. If he just started reading, maybe it's better for him to just keep going slow and steady. Reading didn't click for my oldest until he was 8.5. In 4th grade (age 9/10), his reading had gotten a lot better suddenly, but his writing and spelling really lagged behind. So some things (like math) he could do mostly independently, but other things (like writing) I just chose not to worry about for the moment. We started slowly working on writing as he got older, and we're still slowly working on it. He's not writing like other kids his age, but it's just him, and he's only in 7th grade now. We still have quite a few years to work on writing.

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