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saigemom
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 10:30am | IP Logged
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I know this sounds funny, but I am so frustrated right now. I kind of gave up this week.
Some days I just don't want to play with my kids. Some days I don't want to clean, do laundry, take care of the dogs, plan dinner, make dinner.......
Some days I don't want to go to church (I am always glad I went after, it's the getting there part that can be a problem).
Some days I don't want to stay home and do what is best.
Mostly right now, I am tired of being the "good" mom. My daughter might have lost her best friend because I got into a disagreement with the other mom over a movie she let my dd (7) watch. It was so incredibly unaccepatable that I was floored. I feel sad for my daughter though. The 2 girls were so closse and they had an authentic friendship. The kind where they could be their whole selves, wide open, no pretending to be something else so that the other would like them.
I hate being told I'm sheltering them and overprotective. They are little. I am supposed to....I wish it were easier though. I don't really want to be the kind of mom that thinks my kids can watch whatever and be fine, but right now I wish I was the kind of mom that could have overlooked it. 
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trish
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 11:26am | IP Logged
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First of all...... 
Don't be so hard on yourself. You've just got to pick yourself up and keep on trying. God calls us to be faithful .... not necessarily successful. If you do your part by keeping on trying He'll send you the Grace to over come. It IS hard to be the 'good' mom. Nobody said our vocation was going to be easy. I'll be praying for you.
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~ Trish ~
Wife to Les
Mom to 8 Wonderful Kids
+AMDG+
Saintly Soaps
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 11:28am | IP Logged
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When people feel defensive they often try and make YOU be the one in the wrong. Perhaps she realized after they'd seen it that it really wasn't appropriate but you saying something to her only made her defensive. You don't have to overlook it but everyone makes mistakes, it doesn't have to be a permanant break.
Perhaps you can work with your kids on what movies they can watch.. most of the time (they're kids, definately not perfect  ) my kids will call and ask if they can watch a movie that's one we don't have.. that sorta bypasses another adult oking a movie that we wouldn't.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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Maryan
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 11:28am | IP Logged
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Ugh... it's just not fun being the one that has all the "rules." I know what you mean.  And when you have to explain again why even though so and so is allowed to watch that tv show or that movie or eat that food or whatever, it just takes the joy out of you. And somedays you're just too tired to come up with a fun alternative!
And I'm sorry for your daughter's friendship. 
Hope you have a better day soon.
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Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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CrunchyMom
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 12:01pm | IP Logged
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Ignorance is bliss, huh? Hugs! I think we've all been there.
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Lindsay
Five Boys(6/04) (6/06) (9/08)(3/11),(7/13), and 1 girl (5/16)
My Symphony
[URL=http://mysymphonygarden.blogspot.com/]Lost in the Cosmos[/UR
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teachingmyown
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 12:17pm | IP Logged
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Sounds like it's February at your house, too! I have been having similar feelings lately. Not every day, but enough days that I need to address it. I really think that winter especially drives home that feeling of wanting something a little easier, a little more fun.
One thing I have been trying to remember lately is the grass really isn't greener. I picture myself with kids in school, or working outside the house, or any of the other little fantasies I have. That brings me back to appreciating where I am and remembering why I chose this life. It doesn't make it easier and I am not suddenly happy as a lark, but it helps me to pray my way through it.
As for the friendship, pray for a chance to reconcile. Then institute a rule that your kids always need to call before watching anything. We have had this rule all along. It can be awkward, but it is necessary.
Big hugs! This really is hard and each new day requires a new commitment.
By the way, I think it is okay to declare a day off. Whether that means the kids watch some quality videos for a couple of hours while you read or sleep or blog, or it means eating cereal for dinner and turning up the music that you like while the kids eat. We need to be good, but we need to remember that it's okay to be fun, too!
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In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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anitamarie
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 1:55pm | IP Logged
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I found myself chuckling over other parts of your OP. I refer to it as "rebelling against my vocation". Yes, I get tired, too. It is hard sometimes. But I find that my mental approach or my motivation is off when that happens, or I need to go to confession, or read something encouraging, or take some time away by myself. Remember that the "burden" is supposed to be "light", but sometimes it can feel terribly heavy.
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 8:41pm | IP Logged
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Oh, I hear you!
I was just thinking tonight of all the things I need to pray about/for, and then thinking "But I'm even tired of praying!". How pathetic is that?
It *is* hard to be good all the time. I guess that is why we need God's grace.
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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Cay Gibson
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| Posted: Feb 19 2009 at 9:50pm | IP Logged
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teachingmyown wrote:
| Sounds like it's February at your house, too! |
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 Exactly!!!
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Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
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marihalojen
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| Posted: Feb 20 2009 at 6:32am | IP Logged
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I hope this comes out sounding right, I'm working on very little coffee right now and need to run to get to town in time for choir anyway...
It sounds to me as if you're tired of being a good MOM, right? Maybe it's time to take a night and be a good WIFE! Mardi Gras is fast approaching, grab a babysitter and really go whoop it up with your husband for once. Put on something flirtatious instead of your mom uniform and go play! Mother Church is so awesome in encouraging a balance in her children (us) with a great big party on the mountaintop before plunging into the valley of the desert for 40 days. Taking that idea of balance and applying it to our own daily lives is wonderful! So go have fun and then approach that pile of laundry renewed and refreshed.
Gotta run...
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~Jennifer
Mother to Mariannna, age 13
The Mari Hal-O-Jen
SSR = Sailing, Snorkling, Reading
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Tina P.
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| Posted: Feb 20 2009 at 7:20am | IP Logged
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marihalojen wrote:
| go whoop it up with your husband for once. Mother Church is so awesome in encouraging a balance in her children (us) |
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I was thinking the same thing, only party with your children. We celebrated Hawaiian Day in February once when we decorated the sliding glass doors with construction paper sun and palm trees and blue waves. The kids all wore swimsuits and pretended that a certain part of the floor was ocean so the kids could surf/swim. We put a picnic blanket on the floor and had pineapple and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches (OK, not so Hawaiian after all). We had a micro-unit on Hawaii studying the globe for the location, checking latitude and longitude and reading about the last Hawaiian monarch (don't ask me to spell her name this early in the morning) and how the monarchy dissolved that day with hands-on math counting, adding and subtracting, sorting, and skip counting seashells.
I don't know that the kids remember a whole lot about Hawaii, but they *do* remember the fun we had!
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
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Tina P.
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| Posted: Feb 20 2009 at 7:27am | IP Logged
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And as regards sheltering them, I've heard children being referred to as hot house flowers. Shelter them when they're young. When they're older, they'll be strong enough to resist the temptations that taunt them from every angle. I'm only starting to let go of my 14 yob, much to his chagrin! My 13 yog and I watch movies that I like together. She's very wise on when to use the fast forward button  because almost every adult movie out there has at least one goofy part that was added for the PG rating.
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
Mary's Muse
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Tina P.
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| Posted: Feb 20 2009 at 7:59am | IP Logged
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I forgot! I just posted about this on my blog. There's a few ideas for you there!
God bless,
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
Mary's Muse
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saigemom
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| Posted: Feb 23 2009 at 7:16pm | IP Logged
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Thanks to everyone for replying. Don't take this the wrong way, but sometimes it's nice to know I'm not the only one feeling that way
Yes, the Feb. blahhhs have hit hard here.
Tina- thanks for the blog read! I read it to my dh and we both had a chuckle about how relevant it was for us. 
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Bookswithtea
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| Posted: Feb 24 2009 at 6:24am | IP Logged
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Cay Gibson wrote:
teachingmyown wrote:
| Sounds like it's February at your house, too! |
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Exactly!!! |
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Ummm...yeah, me too... 
Next year I need to have a plan in place before February hits, I think. I don't know what it is about this time of year, but I am not in the mood for much of anything. I'd rather plan next year's school than finish this year's school.
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and  due 9/10
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dawn2006
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| Posted: Feb 24 2009 at 7:13am | IP Logged
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I get this way sometimes. In fact, I used to pretty much LIVE this way. But now it comes on me sometimes very quickly and I have to fight for a day or two before it goes away.
I'm reading Mary Poppins right now and there's a part where the boy Michael wakes up feeling peculiar and with a strange feeling in his stomach. He quickly realizes that the feeling means he is going to be NAUGHTY. I thought this was so funny, but so accurate for ME! LOL! Sometimes I don't want to be good, I want to be naughty! (meaning I don't want to do all the things I'm supposed to and all of the things I shouldn't.)
((hugs))
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Dawn Farias | wife to Ariel | mom to Gabriel 9, Daniel 7, Elizabeth 5, and Michael 3 | blogger at Be Absorbed | native Texan but currently living near Seattle
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Do you ever get tired of being good?
