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Angel
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| Posted: Sept 19 2008 at 5:41pm | IP Logged
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I think this is going to be as much of a vent as it is a prayer request. I have been trying hard to offer it all up, but I guess I could use some help.
I am sitting here in bed with a fever. I just got back from the doctor's office where they officially labeled me with asthma for the first time in my life. Since the beginning of August I spent a blissful week and a half without wheezing or being sick. (The entire month of July was one big allergy attack.) After we came back from our vacation, everybody came down with a sore throat/cough/cold/fever thing, and I'm wheezing again and the albuterol just won't handle it. I had to talk the nurse practioner into giving me something more than advice to wash my pillow cases.  And although I do think a lot of my problems have to do with this 50 year old house and the damp basement that flooded the second summer we were here, I am clearly not just dealing with allergies, I am sick.
Anyway, it's gotten to the point where I'm wondering what God wants out of me. I was trying to do a good job this summer in getting things a little more planned out and nailed down, in cleaning up and getting organized, etc. We were taking a break so we could go on vacation and planning to start school this coming Monday. But our dining room (where we do school) is still a wreck. I have not prepared any sort of activity for the little boys, including my kindergartner, and they *need* something to do because they're bouncing off the walls.
And then, of course, my dd's headaches are still with her, every single day. We stopped giving her the last medication because it made her so tired that she asked us if she could just stop taking any kind of medicine and see if the headaches would go away on their own. 
So I think, okay, we are in "crisis schooling mode"... except that when have we not been in crisis schooling mode for the past 6 or 7 years?
Anyway, I would appreciate it you would say a Hail Mary for me -- so that I can just focus on what is important in the moment instead of worrying about the state of affairs (there's a bit more there than I have mentioned)... and also for some relief from this asthmatic gunk or whatever it is so I can at least breathe well enough to read aloud.
(And also, to all who are praying for my dd -- thank you. I'm not sure what God wants from her either, but I can't believe how well she handles her pain.)
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Angela
Mom to 9, 7 boys and 2 girls
Three Plus Two
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aussieannie
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| Posted: Sept 19 2008 at 5:44pm | IP Logged
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Remembering all your needs and those of your family in prayer Angela!
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KC in TX
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Praying, Angela!
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KC,
wife to Ben (10/94),
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Tina
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| Posted: Sept 19 2008 at 7:56pm | IP Logged
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Praying for all your intentions, Angela.
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~Tina
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MarilynW
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Dear Angela - I am praying for you - for healing and strength and peace and guidance about how to school. I think of you often my friend - other twin mommies and also one year post-partum mommies figure high on my prayer list.
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Marilyn
Blessed with 6 gifts from God
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Cay Gibson
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Dear Angela,
My heart goes out to you.
Be at peace though. By the looks of your blog, you are doing an amazing job with your homeschool.  It might not be the "plan" you originally put together, but it will all fall into place.
I do know how hard it is to feel good about anything when you're feeling poorly though.
Many Hail Marys and a (((HUG))) to you and all your intentions.
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Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
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Booksnbabes
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Praying for all of your intentions.
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Wife to wonderful DH, mom to SIX beautiful gifts from God!
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Carole N.
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Angela, offering prayers for you and your family!
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 Carole ... in Wales
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amyable
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| Posted: Sept 20 2008 at 4:54am | IP Logged
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You know you have my prayers, Angela - tons of them. And commiseration, as usual. "What do you *want* from me, God?" has been my constant cry lately...
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Amy
mom of 5, ages 6-16, and happy wife of 
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Sept 20 2008 at 9:43pm | IP Logged
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Cay Gibson wrote:
Be at peace though. By the looks of your blog, you are doing an amazing job with your homeschool.
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That's what I was thinking, Angela! It looks like you're doing an awesome job to me!
You do have an intense load, and I am sending prayers for your peace, your ability to persevere under challenging circumstances, your joy.
How I wish I could pop over and bring a dinner and run around in the backyard with all the kids so you could have some uninterrupted work time!!!
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Jen Mackintosh
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mariB
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Dear Angela,
Life is so hard sometimes ...Praying for you and all that you are going through. Also, praying for your daughter and for a very healthy fall and winter for you all!
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marib-Mother to 22ds,21ds,18ds,15dd,11dd and wife to an amazing man for 23 years
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Angie Mc
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Praying for you, Angela, and checking in...how are you all doing?
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Angel
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| Posted: Oct 09 2008 at 10:59am | IP Logged
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Just wanted to thank you all for your prayers (and thanks, Angie, for checking in on me )... The asthma is better. I was able to get some steroids (not the inhaled kind) and that helped clear things up. After that virus we were well for a while, and then the baby came down with something else and developed an ear infection. No one else has gotten sick yet, but I can feel my allergies (or whatever they are) kicking in again since the steroids have worked out of my system. Every time my nose stuffs up I think, "Oh, no, not again!" I'm a bit shell-shocked, I think...
I got to thinking about all your words of encouragement, too, and managed for a while to believe them.  It's so easy to slide back into negativity, particularly when I've been dealing with a baby who wakes hourly at night for... well, a long time. There's just such chaos here, and I end up thinking, "I could be a good wife to my husband and mother to my children if only I didn't have to eat, sleep, sit down, go to the bathroom, or bathe." Someone honestly seems to need me every second of the day. (I know I am not the only one who feels this way -- right???)
I'm really trying to get a handle on the idea of suffering and embracing one's crosses as well. It seems like I catch hold of the idea for a day or two, and then it slips out of my grasp again. It's not like we're losing our house, losing a baby... any of those really bad things that can happen in a life... but it's just the daily little things that add up. And it's hard to do without a network of support. There isn't anyone IRL who I can go to for help, really. Our family lives far away, and the few friends that we have all live forty minutes or more away from us. I cannot even call anyone on the phone because me being on the phone equals immediate disaster around here.
So, anyway, if you would just continue to think of me every now and then in your prayers, I'd appreciate it. Maybe you could all pray that the baby miraculously starts sleeping through the night. That would definitely be divine intervention!
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Angela
Mom to 9, 7 boys and 2 girls
Three Plus Two
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doris
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Praying, Angela. I would also echo the sentiment that your blog demonstrates what a great job you really are doing!
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Willa
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Angel wrote:
So, anyway, if you would just continue to think of me every now and then in your prayers, I'd appreciate it. Maybe you could all pray that the baby miraculously starts sleeping through the night. That would definitely be divine intervention!
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I am putting you on my prayer list, Angela!
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Willa
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Taffy
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I'll be praying for you, Angela!
BTW - I hope that your house doesn't have a mold problem?
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Susan
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ladybugs
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I know how you feel, Angela!
You're in my prayers!
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Maria P
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jdostalik
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Just seeing your request, Angela, but you have my prayers, too. Hang in there...
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Jennifer in TX
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Mackfam
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| Posted: Oct 09 2008 at 9:02pm | IP Logged
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Angel wrote:
There's just such chaos here, and I end up thinking, "I could be a good wife to my husband and mother to my children if only I didn't have to eat, sleep, sit down, go to the bathroom, or bathe." Someone honestly seems to need me every second of the day. (I know I am not the only one who feels this way -- right???)
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No, you're not the only one, Angela!!! You're feeling isolated and overwhelmed. I don't have your challenges, and I feel the same way at times.
You are frequently on my mind and in my prayers! I'm begging for some of that Divine Intervention for your little guy so you can get some much needed sleep!
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Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19, ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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Booksnbabes
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| Posted: Oct 09 2008 at 9:12pm | IP Logged
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Angel wrote:
| "I could be a good wife to my husband and mother to my children if only I didn't have to eat, sleep, sit down, go to the bathroom, or bathe." |
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This is how I feel most days too! And my little ones tend not to be "good" sleepers. We get to age two, we're down to one or two wakings a night, and then we're expecting again and I can't sleep anyway! 
Fervently praying that your baby begins sleeping through the night!
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Wife to wonderful DH, mom to SIX beautiful gifts from God!
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4Real Forums : We Pray to the Lord
Topic: Asthma, crisis schooling, etc. - UPDATE
