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guitarnan
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| Posted: Sept 16 2008 at 2:39pm | IP Logged
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Of course they are not married...my kids are very upset to hear this news, particularly my ds (16).
While I am glad they intend to keep the baby, they have been sponging off my m-i-l for months and I have a feeling the saga will spiral downward from here.
Please pray for them and for me - I obviously need a more charitable spirit toward them.
Thanks...
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Carole N.
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You are in my prayers, Nancy, as well as your family.
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 Carole ... in Wales
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JodieLyn
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Nancy I find it helps me to try and find the "sad" in what makes me "mad". And attribute things to confusion/lack of understanding rather than maliciousness.
That also helps me with explaining things to my kids as in...
isn't it so sad that people get so confused and think that killing their unborn baby will help them when all it ends up doing is killing the baby and hurting them.. we need to pray for them.
It's sad that *whatever relative* is confused and didn't wait to get married before (getting pregnant, living together, etc). We should pray for them.
It seems to help acknowlege the wrong and help keep the kids from announcing  that the other person is wrong.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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hylabrook1
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Praying for your nephew, his girlfriend, your mil, and everyone touched by this.
Peace,
Nancy
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aussieannie
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Praying for everyone here, especially for the new baby to come!
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Under Her Starry Mantle
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Blessed with 3 boys & 3 girls!
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guitarnan
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| Posted: Sept 16 2008 at 6:13pm | IP Logged
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Thanks for the prayers...one positive thing from all of this so far is that both my children realize that the baby is an innocent person who deserves the best possible life. They also see very clearly where my nephew and his girlfriend went astray - my nephew was not raised in a religious home, and my son said, "This is what happens when you don't give young children a solid moral upbringing!" (Wow!)
I spent all afternoon wondering what my response to my m-i-l should be, once she brings the subject up. I think the Holy Spirit and I will be having lots of conversations over the next few days!
I'm just so, so thankful that they are having the baby...a real blessing!
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Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
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Mary G
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One thing we need to look at in a situation like this is sometimes the baby born from such a bad setting brings so much good to both parties -- "growing up" on the part of the parents and the realization that this life that is growing in utero is sacred and a blessing.
I've seen folks come back to the Church when they've been single moms or straightening out their lives because of the little bundle that God has given. Please don't count them out yet ...
Prayers are the best option right now ... as well as an open heart and home and support for their decision to carry the baby to term.
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MaryG
3 boys (22, 12, 8)2 girls (20, 11)
my website that combines my schooling, hand-knits work, writing and everything else in one spot!
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Mackfam
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Adding my prayers for all of you, Nancy!
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Jen Mackintosh
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TracyQ
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Nancy,
We have had this happen in our family as well, and it is not easy. We have over 50 nieces, nephews, great nieces, and great nephews, and we have found that sometimes even when kids are brought up in a religious home, with a solid, moral upbringing, this still happens. I'm learning slowly and very surely that the sins/horrible decisions of the child do not always reflect the parents or that young man/woman's upbringing.  Sometimes they just make really bad decisions in spite of how hard we tried. 
One of our nephews has two children, each having a different mother. He is in his mid 20's, and hope one day he'll grow up and make better decisions. He was not one brought up in a religious home, but his brother was brought up in the same home, and has made some better decisions (not all, but some).
Another of our nephews got married very young to a 17 yo girl who was expecting their child. We thought their marriage would be done in 6 months, tops. They have been married 11-12 years (can't remember now), and they have 4 beautiful children, and are doing their best to work hard to make a good life for all of them, and be a good family. This is my sister's son, and he was brought up in a solidly moral, religious home. Maybe that solid, moral upbringing has made his decisions better ones for his family than my other nephew who hasn't though.
One thing with my nephew who has his second child with the second mom is that he's learning lessons now, as my great nephew who is still a baby was born with deformities in his feet and hands (claw feet and hands). Even if he didn't want to, this is making him grow up more. Maybe through this child, God will work on his heart, and bring him to Him. We pray for that for sure.
I will be praying for your nephew, his girlfriend, his baby, and your family. I do know the frustration you are feeling now, I've felt it too several times. But God will bring you to peace in His incredible way and perfect time, and allow you and your family to use this so that the Lord can work His purpose through this difficult situation. Yes, my kids too have had to learn MANY lessons through their cousins sins and some of the horrible decisions they've made in their lives. But for the most part, we are blessed with wonderful kids, growing to be wonderful young men and women.  Regardless, the babies that come into our family, no matter the circumstances are welcomed with open arms and hearts, and they receive the same love as every child does, and the blessings they've brought to our family are too numerous to say! 
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Blessings and Peace,
Tracy Q.
wife of Marty for 20 years, mom of 3 wonderful children (1 homeschool graduate, 1 12th grader, and a 9th grader),
homeschooling in 15th year in Buffalo, NY
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DominaCaeli
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I'm sorry this is happening in your family, Nancy--prayers here.
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Celeste
Joyous Lessons
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organiclilac
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This happened to my BIL and his girlfriend right before dh and I got married. They ended up getting married, but are now divorced and married to other people.  Expecting a baby makes it so much harder to discern whether you are really supposed to be together. Praying that this couple makes the right choices!
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Tracy, wife to Shawn, mama to Samuel (4/01) and Joseph (11/11), and Thomas (2/15)
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amyable
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Praying for all concerned, Nancy!
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Amy
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Ruth
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Praying here.
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Ruth
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cathhomeschool
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I have been keeping this situation in my prayers, Nancy.
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Janette (4 boys - 22, 21, 15, 14)
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stefoodie
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Praying for all concerned, Nancy. We've had several situations like this in our family -- some have worked out, others didn't. We just have to trust in God's grace and provision -- He's not through with these kids! :) And YES, it is a HUGE blessing that they are having the baby. Celebrate the gift of new life.
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stef
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Angie Mc
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Praying for you all, Nancy.
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Booksnbabes
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Praying for them, the baby, and that God will do amazing things with them through this blessing!
Hugs to you and your family. It is so difficult to watch sin in action, especially those that affect so many lives. No real advice, just empathy. 
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Wife to wonderful DH, mom to SIX beautiful gifts from God!
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4Real Forums : We Pray to the Lord
Topic: Nephew's girlfriend is expecting
