| Author | |
juststartn
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1321
|
| Posted: July 26 2008 at 7:14pm | IP Logged
|
 |
|
First of all, the bills will be paid. We can pay those. Of course, paying those, means we have just under $40 to last three weeks (until/unless my BIL's check arrives, and we don't how much/when that will be--he owes us $750).
We cannot even afford to fill up the van completely, for DH to go to work. CANNOT. No room on the cc, no room anywhere. We have the one car. That's it. No way of him getting a carpool ride. We're stuck.
Last week, we came to the very uncomfortable realization that if DH wanted to make it to work, we had to NOT go to Mass. We have food, we have our bills paid. But we cannot afford to go to Mass--it is the equivalent of another trip and back to work...
It was not something we WANT to do. We KNOW we are in need of the sacraments. Believe me! But if we go to Mass, DH won't be making it to work to pick up his paycheck later this week...
To top it off, we'd ordered 50 chicks to be delivered this week. They were shipped off Weds, didn't arrive here til today--1/3d were dead on delivery, and we're below 1/2 now, in the hours since. The hatchery is closed, and this is $40+ of dead chicks we are talking about...another blow...even though the hatchery will make good on it, its still very frustrating...
We're clinging to the hope that the VA letter will come SOON--DH is calling them on Monday to find out what is going on (about the same time he calls the hatchery about the chicks). What we're really hoping is that they will deposit the back pay into our account, before we get the letter, and the letter will be here this next week. Of course, we have to drive to get to an ATM, so we don't think its there now, and I'm calling my SIL the loan officer at our bank to see about getting her to call us when/if a huge deposit arrives that is NOT our usual Army retirement money...she keeps tabs on the account for us, which is great...
I've been told I should get myself to mass regardless--that's great, unless you run out of gas going to work on Monday night, in the middle of rural OK...  Its not that I'm going to never go to Mass again, its likely only for a couple of weeks. But I'm down and depressed and DH has GOT to get to work. We can't use up one day's worth of work gas, to get to mass and back...as much as we both want/need to go...
We've got food, we've got the bills paid, for which I am extremely grateful. But the entire first of month of August pay is already gone to bills. Completely. And that's paying minimums on everything (not a good idea, but for the moment, its the only way we can do it--once we get the lump sum back pay, we're paying debt off so that there will be ALOT less to deal with). There is nothing left for gas. And its 3 wks from this past Friday til we get paid again (when we know we should have a wee bit of breathing room, at least temporarily).
Please pray for me/us. If you can, tomorrow at Mass, pray for our family, for our financial situation. I know God will provide--He always has before. But right now, things are tighter than they have EVER been, and we're just barely squeaking by with enough to get DH to work and to put milk in the fridge (fortunately, we've got a pretty full freezer/pantry).
Thanks...
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
mama251ders
Forum All-Star
Joined: Oct 21 2007
Location: Michigan
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 508
|
| Posted: July 26 2008 at 8:22pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Rachel,
We have been in this position several times and it feels horrible.The feeling of helplessness is overwhelming, I know. I am not nearly as knowledgeable about Canon Law or the Catechism as many of the other ladies here, but I think that God understands when things are like this. It's not like you just don't FEEL like going to Mass, you really have a legitimate reason and you are trying to do all in your power to remedy the situation. Sit back, close your eyes and as Solanus Casey says, "Let's see what the good God wants." God will get you through this and you'll certainly appreciate any financial wiggle room from now on! I'll pray for you during Mass tomorrow.
Hugs and Blessings,
Betsie
__________________
Wife to Oliver
Mama to 5 Wonders
Benny, Braidon, Olivia, Anna and Saragh
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
trish
Forum All-Star
Joined: April 11 2007
Location: Canada
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1538
|
| Posted: July 26 2008 at 8:28pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
You have our prayers here!
__________________
~ Trish ~
Wife to Les
Mom to 8 Wonderful Kids
+AMDG+
Saintly Soaps
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
PDyer
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 25 2005
Location: Ohio
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1043
|
| Posted: July 26 2008 at 9:09pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I wonder if, in this situation, if it would be appropriate for you to request a visit from a priest or extraordinary minister to be able to receive the Eucharist. I don't know the specific requirements, but it seems to me that you're homebound in this situation as much as an ill or elderly person is homebound. If there is such a ministry at your parish, I'm sure they would be happy to assist you.
__________________
Patty
Mom of ds (7/96) and dd (9/01) and two angels (8/95 and 6/08)
Life at Home
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
juststartn
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1321
|
| Posted: July 26 2008 at 9:48pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
I could do that, I'm sure. DH would be able to stop by, if Father wanted to give it to him first thing in the morning (we're talking 0730, daily mass is at 9, but DH hardly sleeps when he's working the night shift like he is now  ).
Its a matter between DH making it to work, and us going to Mass. BIL will send us some of the $ he owes, but he didn't say when, precisely, or how much. I'm hoping Monday, and a couple hundred dollars...but we just don't know.
It doesn't help that we're down to 10 of the 50 birds we ordered. TEN! Out of FIFTY!  I've held 5 bitty chicks as they died in my hands, and I couldn't get anything to work to save them. Add in the hormonal craziness of early pregnancy, and you've got a real humdinger of a day..I'm normally not this emotional, so DH is having to deal with it on top of no sleep (3 hrs of sleep in about 36-48hrs )...what a wonderful day...I'm trying to keep in mind that its just a combination of things, and I really don't NEED to be that upset. Easier said than done.
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Michaela
Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 25 2005
Location: Washington
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 2052
|
| Posted: July 27 2008 at 11:56pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
My prayers for your family during this difficult time continue.
My heart is so heavy reading about your wait for the VA money.
Rachel, were you told that you'd receive this money in the very near future? I ask because we didn't start to receive DH's disability until 12 months after he got out (retired). However, we didn't even know it was coming until we received the back pay and called to verify that it was really ours.
It doesn't sound like you can wait another 6 months.
I pray...with all my heart... that the VA check is coming soon and that your BIL can repay some of the money that he owes you.
Does he know how tight money is for you right now?
You probably already know this, however be reassured that there is no sin in honestly being unable to make it to Mass. You aren't just skipping Mass out of lazyness. This is something you have to do.
__________________
Michaela
Momma to Nicholas 16, Nathan 13, Olivia 13, Teresa 6, & Anthony 3
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Mackfam
Board Moderator
Non Nobis
Joined: April 24 2006
Location: Alabama
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 14656
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 7:29am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Rachel,
I am praying for your family - these are stressful times!
I did want to mention that you and your dh have together prudently come up with a budget for your family that carefully stewards the small amount of family money you have. God knows your desire to assist at the Holy Sacrifice of the Mass, but you are in no way missing your obligation. Your husband has made this prudent choice - to use the money to go to work. Have peace!
I would offer the suggestion of spending the morning reading the Sunday readings and then, as a family making a Spiritual Communion together.
I will be praying that your faithfulness is rewarded and that God provides for all your needs!!
__________________
Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
isjalu0826
Forum Rookie
Joined: March 19 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 80
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 8:11am | IP Logged
|
|
|
I was going to suggest the same thing about reading the Readings and making a Spiritual Communion. You could almost do a whole prayer time, centered around that with your family.
Also, what about watching the Mass on EWTN? (I don't know what you get in Oklahoma. Here, believe it or not, we have 3 options on Sunday---EWTN Mass is shown at 8 and 12, and then our Archdiocese broadcasts a local parish celebrating Mass at 10 on a different station).
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JennGM
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 17702
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 8:46am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Rachel,
I've been praying for you. I know you're new in your area and parish, but is there some way to call your parish office and ask for a Eucharistic Minister to come to your house?
Or perhaps there are ministries or families that could help you get to Mass? You could get there with your oldest two without needing much help. I would call the parish office or just leave a message for one of the priests to describe your dilemma. Get the word out -- people will help.
__________________
Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to  & ds1  '03 & ds2  '07
Family in Feast and Feria
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
juststartn
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1321
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 9:46am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Well, we have neighbors nearby who can take one or two of us to Mass on a weekend (We tag team Mass anyway, cause the boys...well, its like a midget wrestling team with volume control/anger issues, lol). We've not called them, yet, cause honestly, we thought it would only be a few more weeks.
DH was medically retired, so *supposedly* he has an "inside track"/higher priority in the VA scheme of things--"supposedly". He is calling them this morning.
We are down to 7 of the 50. I called the hatchery this morning, and they are shipping replacements. They should be here between Thurs and Sat (again).
Thanks for the prayers, ladies. THey are much appreciated...and frankly, the only thing holding me up sometimes.
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
JennGM
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 17702
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 9:48am | IP Logged
|
|
|
juststartn wrote:
| Well, we have neighbors nearby who can take one or two of us to Mass on a weekend (We tag team Mass anyway, cause the boys...well, its like a midget wrestling team with volume control/anger issues, lol). We've not called them, yet, cause honestly, we thought it would only be a few more weeks. |
|
|
Do call them. I was also going to ask if you've joined any local Catholic homeschool group, to get some extra support there?
__________________
Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
guitarnan
Forum Moderator
Joined: Feb 07 2005
Location: Maryland
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 10883
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 10:21am | IP Logged
|
|
|
Even if it's just for a few weeks, it would be a huge help for you, if you decide to ask for transportation to/from Mass.
The VA is so maddeningly slow and customer-unfriendly; I know there are good people working for the VA, but many employees there seem to forget how much military retirees depend on those VA payments. It's criminal, really - you are owed that money and these huge delays are just wrong.
I am adding my prayers to everyone else's...with that heartfelt empathy a fellow military mom can share, added in just for you!
__________________
Nancy in MD. Mom of ds (24) & dd (18); 31-year Navy wife, move coordinator and keeper of home fires. Writer and dance mom.
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
juststartn
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1321
|
| Posted: July 28 2008 at 5:22pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Well, we lost another couple of birds.
Called the VA and they are saying another 4-6 wks, which means that it'll be around the 6mos mark from his claim application...
LOL....
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
hsmom
Forum Pro
Joined: Aug 24 2007
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 253
|
| Posted: July 29 2008 at 4:10pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
juststartn wrote:
We cannot even afford to fill up the van completely, for DH to go to work. CANNOT. No room on the cc, no room anywhere. We have the one car. That's it. No way of him getting a carpool ride. We're stuck.
Last week, we came to the very uncomfortable realization that if DH wanted to make it to work, we had to NOT go to Mass. |
|
|
Is there a Saint Vincent de Paul Society in your parish or Archdiocese. Our StVdP Society gives vouchers for gas when a need arises. Just a thought. I'll keep you in my prayers. Valerie
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
juststartn
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1321
|
| Posted: July 29 2008 at 5:28pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Well, I know that there isn't one here, nor in the closer parishes...I suppose we could call the office in OKC, and see what was available. I'll have to try that tomorrow...
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
Lara Sauer
Forum All-Star
Joined: June 15 2007
Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 679
|
| Posted: July 29 2008 at 7:12pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
You might also want to check with your local Knights of Columbus organization. I don't know what kind of support that they might be able to offer, but feel certain that at a minimum you might be able to get some rides to and from church.
Please don't despair. Many of us are praying for you.
Peace.
__________________
You can take the girl out of Wisconsin, but you can't take the Wisconsin out of the girl!
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
juststartn
Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007
Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline
Posts: 1321
|
| Posted: July 29 2008 at 10:46pm | IP Logged
|
|
|
Check out the prayer forum--more challenges...
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
|
| Back to Top |
|
| |
|
|
4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Okay, Finances and gas and Mass
