Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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domchurch3
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Posted: July 02 2008 at 12:21pm | IP Logged Quote domchurch3

When I went in for the first time 3 weeks ago my doctor did an ultrasound as I did not keep track of my period dates. He said I was 7 weeks. 2 weeks later he sent me to a Dr. who specializes in ultrasounds and that doctor said the baby measured 2 inches which put me at 11 weeks, not 9 like I should have been according to the 1st sonogram. I had an appointment today and when I told the doctor the good news that the sonographer put me 2 weeks further along, he refused to acknowledge that I was further along and puts me at somewhere around 10 weeks today instead of 12 weeks. Both doctors say their sonogram is more accurate. All my first doctor cares about is the due date, but after 5 miscarriages I'm not thinking that far ahead and just want to get into my 2nd trimester. At this point to me, 2 weeks means the difference between being in the 1st trimester and 2nd trimester. My Obgyn did another sonogram today and even though the baby has grown a few centimeter's from the 11th week sonogram he still puts me at 10 weeks. He also told me that perhaps the baby is growing faster for his age but I know that's not true because babies grow at approx. the same rate during the first trimester. I don't know who to believe. Does anybody have a similar story or any advice? He also told me that all my miscarriages put me at greater risk during the second and third trimester and the baby is only safe once I give birth! Needless to say, I'm pretty worried and frustrated. I'd love to hear some stories of women who miscarried but when on to have a safe, healthy delivery of another child. please pray for some peace in my life. I felt like I was granted some when I found out I was further along and I long for that peace again.
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Mackfam
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Posted: July 02 2008 at 12:48pm | IP Logged Quote Mackfam

I've had 3 children after my last miscarriage.

This fear of another miscarriage will threaten to steal your peace, and it also is a temptation for me not to bond or connect with my growing baby out of fear of losing it at any time.

Your doctor was an insensitive dolt , but the honest to goodness truth is that they're not ever really ours. We don't possess them - ever. They're precious gifts from God and entrusted to our care for a short time - whether that's 1 day, 1 month, 1 year or the rest of our lives. Give yourself permission to love the very thought and reality of this baby for just the right now. Let God take care of tomorrow. I promise you He will.

I offer these words to you because I've been right where you are. And I'm back there as soon as the little + sign shows up on the stick. I know this fear and it is an act of the will for me to turn away from it and let it go.

As to your sonogram issue - I've had the same trouble (having multiple ultrasounds with high risk pregnancies) but the doctor generally doesn't change the date unless there is a huge discrepancy. But, I generally know exactly the date of conception, so I don't really go by their projections anyway.

You're close to the end of the first tri. That is an accomplishment! And it is good! Cling to that, and allow yourself to relax in God's goodness and mercy and the sweet thought of a child growing within you. I am praying for you and asking St. Gerard to intercede for this baby and for your peace in a mighty way!

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PDyer
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Posted: July 02 2008 at 1:04pm | IP Logged Quote PDyer

Mackfam wrote:
I offer these words to you because I've been right where you are. And I'm back there as soon as the little + sign shows up on the stick. I know this fear and it is an act of the will for me to turn away from it and let it go.


Me too. We lost our first child, delivered the second, had a loooong break, delivered the third, had a another even loooonnnnnggerrrrr break, and miscarried the fourth. God willing, there will be another + sign someday, and I will be right where you are now, again. I am praying for your peace of mind.      



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amyable
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Posted: July 02 2008 at 1:09pm | IP Logged Quote amyable

I don't put much stock in early sonograms anymore. We have always charted (NFP) - even months I didn't chart I had a very good idea on when we conceived (within a few days). My first baby was measured at being a week younger than I knew she was ... my second baby was measured as being 2.5 weeks younger! Basically they were saying I conceived her three days AFTER my positive home pregnancy test . But the docs wouldn't budge on "due dates".

I'm sure it depends on the nature of your miscarriages, but I've had four very early ones (4-5 weeks) so I had a m/c, then live birth, another live birth, two m/c a live birth, another m/c, and two births.

Many prayers for your pregnancy and peace of mind.

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Tami
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Posted: July 02 2008 at 1:22pm | IP Logged Quote Tami

amyable wrote:
I don't put much stock in early sonograms anymore.


Amy's right!    The reason why the 18 week u/s became a standard was because it was extremely accurate in determining due date/fetal age. Other times the sonos can't distinguish nearly as well between an incorrect due date or a compromised baby.

I'd hang in there (and yeah, like Jennifer said, you're practically at the 2nd trimester already. Yeah and see what the 18 week report says.

And truth be told, the baby's going to come when the baby's going to come!! It's all in God's hands, ya know? I pray that the peace returns swiftly to your heart. Sounds like the enemy just wanted to snatch it away.

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vmalott
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Posted: July 05 2008 at 7:53am | IP Logged Quote vmalott

domchurch3 wrote:
He also told me that all my miscarriages put me at greater risk during the second and third trimester and the baby is only safe once I give birth!


At greater risk of what? Losing the baby further along into your pregnancy? blood clots? death? What??? Sheesh! Nothing like that statement to put you on pins and needles, right?

Like so many others who have responded, I've had miscarriages (all in the second trimester, though don't let that worry you)...three non-consecutive, and there have been seven healthy babies interspersed. (2 babies, 1 loss, 1 baby, 1 loss, 3 babies, 1 loss, 1 baby).

Hang in there,
Valerie

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