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Kristie 4
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| Posted: July 02 2008 at 10:16am | IP Logged
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I am so stressed. We have been slowly going into debt since we made our last move, which was into the city. Our income has remained the same, but on the island we lived in clergy housing and didn't have car payments.
I find the debt is gnawing away at me more and more every day. I do all of our finances so I feel so responsible- even though my dh doesn't feel this way.
My dh is taking off time today to really look at this with me. Step one will probably be to sell our only vehicle- even though we live very central I am not looking forward to this (and feeling quite sorry for myself in the process  ). Taking four kids on the bus is not an easy feet....
Maybe this should have been in the prayer forum. I am not sure there are answers to this, but I felt that this was somewhere I could come 
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Kristie in Canada
Mom to 3 boys and one spunky princess!!
A Walk in the Woods
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Vanna
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| Posted: July 02 2008 at 10:21am | IP Logged
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I will pray for you.
I wish I knew the answer. We struggle with the same thing. I'm sorry. I know how stressful it can be.
((hugs))
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Mackfam
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| Posted: July 02 2008 at 10:46am | IP Logged
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Well, I think it's always a bit of a struggle and challenge. Moving really compounds that challenge, I think. We're big fans of Dave Ramsey - he's sort of the standard bearer for getting out of debt. Let your first trip on the bus be to go to the library and check out his books.
Claim some time with your dh over the next couple of weeks and sit down and work out a realistic budget.
My dh sets up our budget to work in a couple of ways. First, he projects his income and then subtracts from it our expenses. Pare these down to living and survival essentials. Then, with the money that's left (sometimes there isn't, but some checks there is) he divides it up on paper into different categories we might want to save something in for a rainy day (in order to avoid debt.) He has set up for me the following categories:
***Weekly allowance (this is an expense - it comes off the top and includes groceries, light bulbs, whatever...)
***Clothing
***Home Repair and Maintenance (this is a biggie - we save enough in here to cover a deductible and then some for other repairs or home improvement projects)
***Car Maintenance
***Homeschool (for monthly expenditures)
***Homeschool (for the big yearly purchase)
***Blow Money (just a little spending money if finances allow)
***Furniture and Small Appliance
***Christmas and Gift Fund
There are a few others, but you get the idea. You set up your budget to reflect your needs and try to anticipate some needs before they creep up and bite you. It takes time, and sometimes we can only add a tiny amount to our funds, but it does build. The biggest thing was setting up a livable and realistic weekly allowance for me to use. I had to be accountable to my dh, and stick to my allowance - not always easy.
I hope this gives you a few ideas to mull over, anyway, Kristie. Many prayers coming from here. This is a challenge, I know!
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Jen Mackintosh
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folklaur
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| Posted: July 02 2008 at 10:49am | IP Logged
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Prayers for you. It's hard - I do all our bills too and I HATE it, but dh isn't really good at it and has asked me, specifically, to be in charge of it. 
Prayers. It can be done on one income - (even a pretty low income, and I am speaking from experience here)- but it sure isn't always easy. 
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Kristie 4
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| Posted: July 02 2008 at 11:02am | IP Logged
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Thank you for your kind words and prayers. Feeling more lifted up....
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Kristie in Canada
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A Walk in the Woods
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Kristie 4
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I will check out that book Jennifer...
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Kristie in Canada
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MarilynW
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I second Dave Ramsey - we are big fans here. Also - Mary Hunt.
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MarilynW
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Adding - I do all the finances too as I was a CPA in a former life. Jen is right - a budget is essential - start off with listing your NET income and then all the outgoings. Then figure out where you can save. I am doing that right now reworking our budget as the cost of living and healthcare has gone up so much that we are in danger of spending more than we are bringing in. One of the things I really like about Dave Ramsey - is that he encourages you to get in the position where a big financial hit is not a huge stressful thing - eg a large medical bill or house repair - because you are slowly building up an emergency fund.
We cannot do everything advocated by Dave Ramsey - eg we have to have a mortgage - I don't care for it, but impossible not to. We also maintain one credit card only - but never spend on it unless we have the money in the bank to pay it off. I keep it because it is easier for me to shop online - and after a big review or debit cards I have come to the conclusion that they are way more risky than credit cards.
I will pray for you - I know how stressful it can be to get those numbers to add up.
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SylviaB
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Another huge fan of Dave Ramsey!!!
Definetely recommend the book
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Jenny
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Another Dave Ramsey fan!!
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asplendidtime
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Wow neat!!! We're Dave Ramsey fans too, we have his book "The Total Money Makeover". I also listen to his radio program regularly, which is available for free on his website It has made a huge difference in our finances.
You aren't alone Kristie we live in Red Deer Alberta, and it's pretty expensive here too.
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monique
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Hugs from me, Kristie. I will pray you and your husband will figure things out. We are in the same boat and every time I think about it I feel like that other thread about the deer frozen in the headlights.
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Kristie 4
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| Posted: July 02 2008 at 4:44pm | IP Logged
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The deer frozen in the headlights is a very good analogy.
Well, we sat down this afternoon and did all the numbers. It wasn't surprising that we don't have enough coming in to cover our expenses- we don't live grandly and very thrifty, but still we do have to make some changes. Our emergency budget (the one to follow to not go further into debt until our income can be raised) leaves me with $100 a week for groceries and one tank of gas I am taking it as a challenge, but will need much prayer to make it work (groceries for those of us up North are pretty steep). We will be biking a lot and driving very little.
But our 'meeting' this afternoon has gotten me out of the 'hopeless' feeling, with much help from your prayers.
Thank you for being there for me when I needed it so much
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Kristie in Canada
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juststartn
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We're in similar situations. We just left a comfortable salary with the military, and are now making it on DH's Army retirement, and his civilian salary (which is $11/hr, full time). We've got a whopping $150/month left. This continues until the VA gets his disability percentage figured out, and we see how much he gets for his Combat Related Special Compensation (CRSC). We can use every penny. Hopefully we'll find out this month, around mid-month, so that 1 August will see a raise in the money we get. But until then...ugh. I'm going nowhere and doing nothing I don't ABSOLUTELY have to do...DH uses two gallons of gas just going to work and back each day, so we have to just deal with it and go nowhere...
I'm glad I've got a really full pantry and a garden just starting to produce. 
Rachel
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Kristie 4
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Thank you Rachel for your sympathy.
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Kristie in Canada
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Maddie
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Kristie,
I know just what you are going through. It is so hard today to just live. I'm working with all my creditors and they keep asking me what I do to "contribute" since I "won't" work. I definitely feel that deer frozen in the headlights feeling quite often, I really try to battle my fear with trusting in Our Lord.
A couple Sundays ago at Mass, we had a gentleman come in to sell religious items made by Christians in the Holy Land. He said Christians are persecuted as it is predominately a Muslim or Jewish country. Christians routinely get denied employment because they are Christians and not Jewish/Muslim. Gas is nearly $10 a gallon there and a pound of meat is near $12!! How could a family survive? My dh and I just looked at each other in disbelief. We bought a few items even though we couldn't really afford it.
My favorite saint stories begin like this: "St. _______ was from poor but pious parents....
I have to remember it's all about getting our children and ourselves to Heaven and it's not about laying treasure up here on earth.
Well, anyway, I could wander from point to point as I've had plenty of experience with financial woes.
Praying for you and your family.
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~Maddie~
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Kristie 4
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Thank you Maddie. Wow, what an encouraging bunch of folks here.
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Kristie in Canada
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