Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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St. Anne's Tearoom: Growing in Wisdom over 40
 4Real Forums : St. Anne's Tearoom: Growing in Wisdom over 40
Subject Topic: I am turning into my grandmother!!!! Post ReplyPost New Topic
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chrisv664
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 10:17am | IP Logged Quote chrisv664

She used to cry at the drop of a pin, and now I seem to have picked up the torch. I have always been a bit sensitive, but yesterday, my 2nd oldest graduated High School. There was a Mass in the morning and graduation in the afternoon. I was weepy throughout both. Very embarassing. When I see my kids checking my eyes to see if they are watery and red from crying, I feel like my grandmother! Do any of you other 40-something women have this problem? Will it go away anytime soon? Should I just buy stock in Kleenex? Any tricks for avoiding this? I try to distract myself by thinking about other things, but then I am not fully present in the moment I should be in... like Mass, graduation, etc... but right now thinking about laundry instead of paying attention to the tear-provoking moment is the only thing that works. I am really frustrated!

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LLMom
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 10:31am | IP Logged Quote LLMom

No help here, only can sympathize. I have always been very emotional. Just keep lots of kleenex with you.

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Maria B.
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 10:45am | IP Logged Quote Maria B.

stock up in kleenex!!

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Posted: June 02 2008 at 4:00pm | IP Logged Quote MaryM

Don't know if it's age related - throughout my life it has been easy for me to get teary. Whenever we are watching a movie (you know the Hallmark kind of emotional ones) my kids will reach points where they check my eyes or say, "Are you crying yet, Mom?" I cry for picture books. On Friday, I cried through almost the whole two hour ordination Mass of our new Auxilary Bishop - it was so beautiful and symbolically moving. Maybe it has gotten more pronounced after 40.

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Posted: June 02 2008 at 5:00pm | IP Logged Quote hylabrook1

That's me!

Peace,
Nancy
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Philothea
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 6:48pm | IP Logged Quote Philothea

My husband (who is growing in wisdom over 40 -- but I'm not yet, so excuse my snooping!) is like that. He cries over everything ... not sobbing, but definitely choked up and teary. I think some people just feel their emotions more, there's nothing wrong with it. It can be very beautiful.
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 7:47pm | IP Logged Quote folklaur

not over 40 yet...but I can relate.

You know that book, "I'll love you forever" - with the Mom and the son, and then when she is all old he goes and rocks her...WAH! I am seriously getting a lump in my throat just thinking about that book. I always get all choked up and quivery voiced, and with something like graduations? Are you kidding me?

Don't be embarrassed. (I know, "easier said..." - becuz I get embarrassed too.)
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chrisv664
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 10:41pm | IP Logged Quote chrisv664

That is so funny, Laura. I have the same problem with that book! I was getting a lump just reading your post! I usually pass it off to my husband when I start welling up! He hardly ever cries. He has had alot of loss in his life and not shed a tear; put him down in front of Dr. Seuss "How the Grinch Stole Christmas" (the original cartoon w/ Boris Karloff's voice) and he gets all misty! That is absolutely the only thing I've seen him cry over.


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Posted: June 02 2008 at 11:32pm | IP Logged Quote folklaur

My dh is the same way - except his is the end of "Cool Runnings" - where they carry their bobsled across the finish line. Gets him every time.
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Philothea
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 11:44pm | IP Logged Quote Philothea

A little OT, but am I the only one who finds Love You Forever totally creepy? With all the sneaking and the driving across town with a ladder and everything? Please tell me I'm not the only one!
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Posted: June 02 2008 at 11:51pm | IP Logged Quote MaryM

Philothea wrote:
A little OT, but am I the only one who finds Love You Forever totally creepy? With all the sneaking and the driving across town with a ladder and everything? Please tell me I'm not the only one!


You're not the only one. A friend and I used to joke about the creepiness factor a bit. Maybe not creepy so much as a little obsessed. I mean if they are that close can't she just go in the front door. I do love the end though where he takes her in his arms.

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Posted: June 03 2008 at 12:07am | IP Logged Quote folklaur

okay, yes, I can see the obsessive part (I think it helps little ones, though, as I know all of mine have told me that they want to live with me FOREVER! And see- that Mommy in the story is always there for her child...even if they don't live together....)

I think, for me, I picture my Mom for a lot of it. My brother, the one who had a brain tumor, is like a 3 month old baby in a grown up body. He will always be my Mom's baby. She will still hold and rock him (as best as she can). And the way he looks at her then...well, we know that those doctors who think he is oblivious to what is going on around him are just wrong. So, I think of that, too, and I get extra layers of meaning, I guess...
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Posted: June 03 2008 at 8:14am | IP Logged Quote Philothea

cactus mouse wrote:
okay, yes, I can see the obsessive part (I think it helps little ones, though, as I know all of mine have told me that they want to live with me FOREVER! And see- that Mommy in the story is always there for her child...even if they don't live together....)

I think, for me, I picture my Mom for a lot of it. My brother, the one who had a brain tumor, is like a 3 month old baby in a grown up body. He will always be my Mom's baby. She will still hold and rock him (as best as she can). And the way he looks at her then...well, we know that those doctors who think he is oblivious to what is going on around him are just wrong. So, I think of that, too, and I get extra layers of meaning, I guess...


See, that is a better context to get a lot out of the story. God bless your mom and your precious brother.

My son also wants me to be with him forever, and maybe that is the appeal for the little ones ... he does like that book. However, last night I called him my baby and he protested, so I said "As long as I'm living, my baby you'll be." So he asked that I revise the words to "As long as I'm living, my big boy you'll be." Because he is a BIG BOY, NOT a baby.

Okay, done hijacking the thread now. Back to your regularly scheduled talking about crying easily.   
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Posted: June 03 2008 at 9:04am | IP Logged Quote Tonya

This is such a funny post to me. When I was younger, I never cried. I prided myself on the fact that I never cried (and pride is not a virtue!) My mother-in-law was such a crier that my husband said that she cried at super-market openings. We used to tease her so much. When she died, I think her legacy to me was crying. I cry at everything! My kids take bets about how many times I will cry during a movie or if I will cry at Mass. My 21 and 18 year old girls never cry and make so much fun of me. I just tell them to wait, because their time will come!
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Posted: June 09 2008 at 6:29pm | IP Logged Quote Cheryl M.

Chris - my maternal grandmother was the very same way...would cry over what seemed like "any little thing." I used to sorta tease at her (nicely ) and now I have turned into her.

I tear when someone complements my children, over sad things, over happy things, over song lyrics on the radio, on seeing a newborn baby....over "any little thing."

Now my daughter teases me....

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Posted: Aug 13 2008 at 9:45pm | IP Logged Quote Zeliemum

I can relate to spontaneous crying in many varied circumstances. I cry in a sentimental way over movies but also personal hormonal tears that are a very deep. I alway think of Our Lord's gift of tears, so when I start to cry in what ever situation I just offer them to him with any embarrassment or sadness or happiness they are all inevitable given up to him.
HTH
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Posted: Aug 15 2008 at 9:33pm | IP Logged Quote 4 lads mom

Yep...I'm a crier...my kids roll their (dry) eyes everytime I get a Patricia Polocco book out....I am not kidding, I can't hardly make it through without sobbing. Pink and Say, Babushka Babayaga, etc, etc...they all make me tear up, okay...Sob everytime!!

I do cry at all sorts of things that twenty years ago I would be rolling (dry) eyes at someone like me!!

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Posted: Nov 19 2008 at 1:48pm | IP Logged Quote SueW


This is an old thread, but it struck a chord with me.
I also noticed a tendency to be more sentimental/weepy once I turned forty.

At first I blamed it on sleepiness or hormones (and they can be a factor), but after thinking about it a little I wonder if it is simply because once we reach a "certain age" we realize that there is a poignancy to so many moments in life that we took for granted when we were younger.

Life is so fleeting... it's probably that as we get older we realize how gut-wrenchingly important most everything is.

Ha ha- yes even supermarket openings (if they opened a Trader Joe's in my town I'd be weeping tears of happiness!)

Last Christmas morning, an elderly woman was sitting in our pew with her grown son. When our lovely choir began singing "Silent Night," she began weeping. It didn't take long before many of us were, at the least, teary-eyed along with her.
My children weren't. They don't get it yet. But they will someday.



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Posted: Nov 19 2008 at 2:52pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

Sue, I used to identify myself as a non-crier. I didn't cry at my wedding (I was so happy!)...I didn't cry at movies...I cried when my babies were born (and I had a big cry when they were 3 days old - hormone drop induced I guessed.) Now, reading your post I get weepy! I cry at church all the time - the gospel...the mom holding the baby...the soldier in uniform...the profile of my dh...my boys serving...endless!

At first I was very uncomfortable crying (when I was younger I was uncomfortable at times when I didn't cry - and it seemed that others expected tears) but I'm settling into my new self. Isn't that what being over 40 is about...turning into a new self? Hmmm...I'll think - and cry - on that .

Love,



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Posted: Nov 19 2008 at 9:55pm | IP Logged Quote chrisv664

Angie and Sue

I'm the weepy one who started this thread and it is not getting any better here. I am trying to accept my "new self" as you put it, Angie. I cry at Mass almost every week... there is always something that touches me in some way. This week I had an insight into my mom,( who left this earth twenty years ago) I remember her always coming back to the pew after Communion and bowing her head reverently and covering her face in her hands. I always thought it so reverent. Then this Sunday, I realized I had assumed the exact same posture.. to keep my 8yo ds from seeing my tears! He asks too many questions and I just didn't want to explain... or him to worry. Hmmmm. I wonder . Was my mom as weepy as I am? I get weepy wishing she was here so I could ask her

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