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anniemm
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| Posted: Jan 19 2008 at 6:15pm | IP Logged
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Hi Ladies!
My oldest daughter is 3 years old (soon to be 4), my next daughter is 2, and my baby is 5 months old. We know that we want to homeschool, so this board is just wonderfully valuable to me with all of your experience and ideas! I'm excited to get started, but I also don't feel rushed to start until my oldest daughter is kindergarten age.
I live about 45 minutes North of Denver, and just as in Denver, my area has a great homeschool community. However, I am not involved with them at all because I'm not homeschooling yet! There is nothing in the way of Catholic moms with small children type groups in my area, and most of my daughters' peers are now in preschool OR if I have friends with kids the same age they live far enough away that she doesn't get any regular interaction. I feel like she needs more kid interaction and educational stimulation than I have been giving her in my daily life of caring for 3 very small children.
Does anyone have any suggestions? Should I consider preschool for the Fall? What about MOPS groups, even though they are not Catholic?
Anyone BTDT with some wisdom? Thanks! :-)
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Andrea
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Mama to four little girls (04), (05), (07), (09),& my 1st little guy 11/11
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SeaStar
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| Posted: Jan 19 2008 at 6:35pm | IP Logged
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When my ds was three, I joined my local Catholic HS group. After all, we were doing preschool at home. Many of the moms in the group had children his age or younger, and I learned so much from them. I called it research. Everyone was very welcoming, and I would do it again in a heartbeat.
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Melinda, mom to ds ('02) and dd ('04)
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Jan 19 2008 at 6:51pm | IP Logged
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oh yes, if you have homeschooling groups.. check them out.. some groups have mainly older kids and so the focus is wrong for moms of littles.. but some are very mixed.. I mean.. I have several school aged children.. but I'm not leaving the preschoolers/toddlers/infants at home when we go places 
And MOPS depending on the way it's set up.. may work too. There was one here for a bit that was set up so that it wasn't a problem for us and the kids had fun.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: Jan 19 2008 at 9:46pm | IP Logged
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I agree. Go to the homeschool groups. Families bring their preschoolers and you will be all set when you start. When we were thinking of homeschooling that is what I did. It was a wonderful experience and ds learned it was good to be homeschooled. Now dd is just following along behind and making friends too.
Anne
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SuzanneG
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| Posted: Jan 21 2008 at 12:44am | IP Logged
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Andrea~
Don't hesitate to join the homeschool groups.
We had a GREAT next-door neighbor that had a dd the same age as my oldest, and I loved the mom, so I was very fortunate. BUT, she eventually went to preschool, so I was essentially in the same situation.
At the HS group when my girls were really young, I met a mom with 6 kids....3 teens and then 3 youngers. I would go over to her house occasionally and my girls would play with her preschool age children, while she got some things done with the older kids. After the initial "socializing" that we did on the first visit, it was really productive time for her and my girls got their "friend time".
We have several moms in our group now who aren't officially homeschooling......(I still consider myself one of them  ) with younger dc.
I also wouldn't worry about the "educational stimulation" so much....kids learn no matter what! But, if she is a very social person, that sort of want/need is real. My oldest dd is like that.
Don't discount the "after-school-time" for having friends over. Most preschoolers are only in school a couple hours. Can they come over after/before?
Also, how about "time alone" with mom or dad. Make an effort to do things with just her, even if it's running errands. Sometimes we think kids want to be with other kids, but REALLY they just want some 1-on-1 time with ANYONE......esp. mom and dad.
Small things like going to coffee and donuts after Mass can have a big impact, if there are kids there. My girls think they've died and gone to heaven when we go and there are kids there.
Is there a mom's group at your parish?
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Suzanne in ID
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Sarah M
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Hi Andrea.
I have had wonderful MOPS experiences and would highly recommend you check them out. Really it's a place for mothers of preschoolers to be refreshed and get a little break- and my kids loved going. I never ran into theological problems-- all of our devotionals were light-hearted. Their protestant affiliation never became an issue. Also, I always kept my nursing infants with me- it was never a problem. I benefited immensely from MOPS, especially when my third was just born and my other two were 2 and 4.
My prayers are with you!! Hang in there- God is smiling down on you.
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SuzanneG
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| Posted: Jan 21 2008 at 1:00am | IP Logged
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Andrea~
I just thought of this tooo...
About 2 years ago, I was desperate to find an outlet for my oldest (mentioned above) who really wanted friends, an activity....just SOMETHING! But the "something" had to fit into our life of having 4 small ones, under the age of 5 w/ a dh who traveled.
I prayed a Novena for this intention.....and what do you know???? It worked! About two weeks later I met a mom who lived 1/2 mile from us who was starting a Little Flowers Group! These four "Little Flower Girls" will all be making their 1st Holy Comm. together this year. They only see each other once or twice a month, but it's enough to for them to feel connected.
All that crazy story, just to say....take it to prayer. The Holy Spirit will guide you and put just the right people in your path for you and your children!
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Suzanne in ID
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Barbara C.
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I want echo what the others say about going ahead and checking out your homeschooling group. When my older daughter was 3 1/2 and my younger daughter not yet 1, I found an Unschooling group with a weekly unstructured playgroup. The family we were put in contact with had kids about the same age. It turns out there were several families in the group with just youngsters. We don't get to homeschooling group often because my husband usually has the van at work, but we schedule play dates and activities with the families we have met a few times a month.
You might also look into your local library. They sometimes offer all-ages story times. We tried that this past fall since our library is within walking distance. My oh-so-grown up five year old didn't care for it much, but she stuck it out because her little sister really enjoyed it.
I don't know what the Parks District is like in your area, but many start offering independent activity classes at age 3. The most common ones at that age are gymnastics/tumbling and creative movement. The chances are that most of the people you meet will be traditional schoolers, but it may still be a great outlet for your daughter. And some times us parents like to stand around and compare notes on our kids, when we not chasing around smaller siblings.
And don't underestimate the socializing your children can do with each other. My two play quite a bit with just each other. And keep in mind the old, old days when children grew up on isolated farms. There were no playdates for little ones back then, and they survived.
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Barbara
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SallyT
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All I can do is echo what others have said: in our homeschool group, there are a number of mothers who aren't "officially" schooling yet. It makes sense -- if you think "school" doesn't have walls or doors or time boundaries, but is something you live . . . then why not be living it? Aside from the fact that Catholic homeschool groups seem to have no shortage of families with little siblings, I don't think anyone would bat an eye at your being there.
What Barbara says is true, too -- one of the blessings of homeschooling is that your children become and remain very family-oriented, as opposed to outwardly-oriented towards friends. Not that you don't want them to have friends, but "having" to play with siblings, and having them for constant company, can be a very good thing. And the age differences don't seem to matter that much. My 14- and 4-year-old daughters like to play together quite a bit, and I think it's good for them both to have that kind of interaction. If they went to school, they would have completely separate lives. Whenever I've been tempted to worry that we didn't get out enough, I've always thought of Laura Ingalls Wilder, who seemed to do just fine on a childhood diet of isolation with sisters.
And at this young age, the best "stimulation" a child can receive is being read to, and her own imaginative play. My 4yo spent the afternoon draping a small bookshelf with a pink flannel receiving blanket and putting her tea set on it, telling herself a story and singing the whole time. Better than any activity I could have come up with!
Sally
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Jordan
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My oldest is almost 5 and in the past few years, I've had some of the same feelings you're having.
This year, I joined our local MOPS group and I would definitely recommend doing that if it's an option for you. It's nice to be somewhere where you don't have to explain why you're there.
Our local Catholic HSing group has some very nice families but my children are much younger than the other kids and I felt pretty awkward when I went there.
To an extent, I can see how these years of being home with my little ones, and feeling pretty lonely, has given me some quiet time to grow in my role as a wife and mother, before entering the phase where our lives become busier with school-age children and outside activities. It's been difficult but I have been blessed by it too.
I have also prayed for deeper friendships to develop where I live now, and I see that several doors have opened to me since making this prayer. Sometimes I'll see someone and I'll think to myself that I would like to be friends with that person. When I think this, I ask God for the opportunity to get to know them and usually, it works out that way. Maybe that's a funny thing to pray for, but I'm a shy person and it helps me. The Lord must feel a lot of compassion towards me in this area because He's answered this prayer of mine on several occasions.
Sometimes I think too that Mary must have felt pretty lonely as a young mother when the Holy Family was in Egypt. I have gone to her too.
I pray that your situation becomes easier for you.
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Jordan
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Lonely with Preschooler
