Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: Family Traditions and Rituals Post ReplyPost New Topic
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Basia
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Posted: Dec 11 2007 at 5:34am | IP Logged Quote Basia

Hi

I hope this is the right forum for posting this topic.

I would like to create some additional family traditions and rituals in our home. I'm also interested in hearing about what everyone does on a daily basis to create a warm and loving atmosphere at home - those small special acts which a child remembers even as an adult. The sort of traditions and rituals can include:

Celebration Traditions. The things we do that are built around special occasions that call for a celebration (holidays, birthdays, anniversaries, etc.)
Family Traditions. The special things that are created within each family to fit their lifestyle (vacations, family council, pizza night, etc.)
Patterned Family Interactions. Those events that are centered around the day to day things in life. (dinner time, bed time, Sunday afternoons, etc.)

For example, in our home my daughter and I go out once a week for a girl's day out. We would browse in some shops, have lunch, and borrow a movie from the video store to watch at home in the evening.

Thanks
Basia
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asplendidtime
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Posted: Dec 11 2007 at 9:45am | IP Logged Quote asplendidtime

I got some neat ideas from Fridge Art at the Domestic Church It is a really fun website!


And of course I have learned a lot from the lovely ladies here!

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aussieannie
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Posted: Dec 11 2007 at 1:38pm | IP Logged Quote aussieannie

Basia, what about celebrating name days for the children (the saint's name feast day in their own name)- mine is St Anne on the 26th of July. Starting a special celebration in the way we would for our birthdays.

Also, I make a big thing of their baptismal days and we go off to Mass, the children hear Father announce that the Mass offered that day is in thanksgiving for their baptismal day, gift giving with a lovely Catholic picture book or gift would be something special they could look forward to - they feel very special on these days.

What about having a set time of the evening for Catholic enjoyment reading (or not Catholic necessarily, you might be wading excitedly with the children through LOTR or something) with the children, it becomes a beautiful, bonding time that they just love and I know they will never forget it! I always think there is a special bonding process when mother(or father) and children read together in this way.

Do you use anything like Catholic Mosaic at all? I remember being greatly inspired by Elizabeth's words when it was first released, she talked about how it can become a beautiful part of your family/children's lives and they will never forget it like a heartbeat...Here are Elizabeth's thoughts

Talking about being inspired by Elizabeth, I have been reading her book Real Learning: Education in the Heart of the Home and in there she makes mention of having a small afternoon tea after school is finished - it doesn't have to been too long - a time when mum and children sit around the table with cups of tea and homemade biscuits (cookies) etc, with some soothing music in the background and spending the time just to talk, chat and laugh together - we started to do this and I have to say the effect was incredible. I've fallen 'off the wagon' with it now my due date is drawing closer and other pressures drawing in but I fully intend to start this beautiful thing again in the New Year as it had a profound affect on the atmosphere in our home, if it could be done nearly every day I believe it would have powerful ripples of love and bonding.

Alot is talked about how the loss of family time around the dinner table is changing the habits of good family life in society (you read it in secular papers even) maybe at grace you can some special time to pray and thank God in a more extended and shared way - we often use a beautiful book called Blessings of the Table.

I heard or read someone say recently that the day the family goes to confession (say once a month on a Saturday afternoon) they make it there pizza night afterwards, I am sure they were saying that it was a great, memorable association for them!

A special blessing at night by both mum and dad (or either) going from room to room and blessing them on the forehead with holy water, blessed oil or just your finger if necessary - a parental blessing, Biblically is an extrememly powerful thing that we have sort of lost sight of - when you read in The Exorcist Tells His Story how exorcists have the greatest troubles removing curses and other awful stuff from people inflicted by these things by their own parents then we KNOW that our actions for their good in such a sacramental way has to be even more powerful!! I have a special made up prayer for my children as I go around and I see the contentment on their faces, it must soothe them to hear those familiar words with love and them knowing you are wishing such good and love for them all as I make the sign of the cross...

Just some thoughts, it is a great question and it has me thinking about what other family bonding activities can be incorporated in our own lives, I'd be interested to hear more of what others suggest/or do.


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MarieC
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Posted: Dec 11 2007 at 5:11pm | IP Logged Quote MarieC

We do some of the things mentioned above and they really do seem to make lasting memories.

Another tradition we've developed and my kids really seem to like are 1/2 birthday celebrations. We let them choose the dinner food and I bake them 1/2 a cake. Just plain frosting....no decorations. It's a small thing that celebrates their life. With five children we end up with 20 celebrations between birthdays, 1/2 birthdays, baptismal days and name days! That's a lot of celebrations to make memories!

We also have a "Kid of the Day"...that child is the one who gets the extra chore AND the extra bonuses that day. If I need a "go-fer" they're it. If there's an extra piece of something, they get it. They usually get to pick first if there's a choice to be made. That child always starts off our evening prayers as well. DH calls them "the K.O.D."!

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hsmom
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Posted: Dec 12 2007 at 1:17pm | IP Logged Quote hsmom

We do the afternoon tea thing. Basically makes snack time more special, and we are going to have snack anyway so it's not like adding another stressor in life-just a pot of boiling water. Valerie
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SallyT
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Posted: Dec 12 2007 at 4:23pm | IP Logged Quote SallyT

Our rituals are more to do with the liturgical year than anything else. Trying to think of more daily things . . . reading aloud together, prayers at night with singing, eating supper by the fire in the winter, lighting candles (my kids LOVE to light candles -- it makes any table festive and any time an occasion).

My kids like to have tea, too, even my little ones -- I just make it very weak, with lots of milk. And a saucer -- whatever you're drinking is WAY more special if you have a saucer and a cup that goes "clink" when you set it on the saucer.

Actually, now that I think of it, many of my "home" rituals have to do with dishes and the table -- I love old dishes and have collected some nifty vintage ironstone. Even when we're eating in the den by the fire, without a table cloth or even a "set" table (we use the kitchen island as a buffet), we're eating off pretty dishes, with pretty old mismatched silverplate cutlery that I got in secondhand shops. I just love the way silver, and plate, clinks (obviously I have a thing for clinking at the table!). When we eat in the dining room, as we often do, I always use a tablecloth, turn the lights down, and light a candle. To me, even though we're together all day long, dinner is a special family time, and I try to create an atmosphere that encourages lingering and talking, not bolting and running. So even when we're not celebrating anything "special," we're still celebrating being together, being grateful to have food and a roof over our heads, being grateful for the beauty of God's creation even in these simple gifts. I hadn't really thought of this as a ritual, in a formal sense, but I guess it is.

Here's a post I wrote on this theme (and many others -- I tend to ramble!) several months ago. Ignore the "review this post" button . . .

I'm enjoying hearing about everyone else's rituals.

Sally

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Leonie
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Posted: Dec 13 2007 at 11:03pm | IP Logged Quote Leonie

Hi Basia!

As a young mum, I got most of my ideas for traditions and for family nurturing from novels - some I really liked were the Austin series by Madeleine L'engle , esp "The Twenty Four days of Christmas" for starting Advent traditions.



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Basia
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Posted: Dec 22 2007 at 6:44pm | IP Logged Quote Basia

Thankyou for some lovely ideas. Although we have been doing a few of the things mentioned here, we really want to expand on our rituals and traditions. These ideas provide a great starting point. I really want my children to grow up with fond memories of their days at home and hopefully have them carry on these traditions and rituals with their own children.

Leonie are there any other books you can recommend which give examples of rituals and traditions? I love to read and will be getting the Madeleine L'engle books.

Thanks again ... Basia

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