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kathleenmom
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I'm not even sure what to pray for again...discernment, solace, peace, healing...any combination would be good.
I've alluded to one of our children in a few previous posts, but I guess I'll just go ahead and lay the groundwork properly  . Our ds7 has been diagnosed with OCD (Obsessive Compulsive Disorder) and ODD (Oppositional Defiance Disorder). I won't weary everyone with the sordid details. Suffice it it say that my house is not a peaceful one these days. DS is a very very unhappy boy and unfortunately, there are 6 other people in the house that are being very adversely affected by his serious behavioral difficulties.
Here is where the prayer part comes in:
Pray for healing...there is a heap of guilt...for my dear husband and myself. There is a good dose of heredity here....OCD and other anxiety issues from my father's family. There is guilt over the possibility that his birth injury may have exacerbated this problem according to the Drs. My son was born at home with a midwife and he had a shoulder dystocia. He was hypoxic for 4 minutes. They tell me that the part of the brain first affected by hypoxia is where impulse control and such are located. Sigh. If I had chosen to have him in the hospital, they mosty likely would have delivered him by C-section and perhaps my son wouldn't have these problems.
Then, of course, there is just poor management. Regular parenting strategies just don't work and in fact backfire with children like this. We have made SO many mistakes.
Then there is all of the collateral damage. My other children are suffering enormously. They are suffering from being the brunt of his anger, irrationality, violent outbursts an ever present, almost palpable chaos. This is so poisonous. They are suffering from not getting enough of me and my husband. Managing this child uses up a disproportianate amount of our resources. The rest of our children are being given short shrift and the younger ones especially are very needy and showing signs of wear.
This feels like a spiritual attack. I feel like my whole role of Mother and our call to homeschool and be open to life is under attack. I find myself so despondent, fearful and panicky these days. How can I homeschool these children under these conditions? Where has the joy in my family gone? How can I meet all of their needs when I have to spend hours a day some days wrestling with a kicking, screaming, spitting, biting violent child....my child....the child I carried for nine months under my heart, attatchment-parented, met every want and need for as a baby...loved and cherished with tender devotion..... how did this happen to him? Despair is a sin and I can't dig out at the moment.
He is on medication. We really felt we had no other choices...his behaviour was so egregious. So damaging to himself and others, we needed a way to give everyone some breathing room so we could dig in our heels, roll the sleeves up and get to work on some behavior modification. Sigh. The decision to medicate was a very difficult one to come to for my husband and myself. We are very conservative when it comes to medicines. Now, here we are filling my dear child full of psychotropic drugs and the results have been very disappointing. Dear son's behaviour is worsening and the patterns of behaviour becoming more and more damaging, entrenched and nasty.
Please pray for our discernment. We have to make some very hard decisions about how we are going to homeschool under these conditions? Should we send our son to public school to give everyone some breathing space? I am certain this is not the best solution for him, but there are others well-being in jeapordy. Should we explore some in patient treatment programs that would entail travel, monetary hardship, extended stay on my part away from the rest of my children while I go through a program with him.....
I'm rambling.....I can't name all of the things that could be prayed for. I feel so inarticulate. I'll pray that Our Blessed Mother will lead you to pray for us and help you know what to pray for. I can't find the words.
Thankyou ladies.
Kathleen
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DH Daniel, Sophia Brigid (97), Russell Powers (99), Honoria Jane (02), John Patrick (05), Brigid Mary Feb. 24, 2007!
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StacyLynn
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Praying Kathleen-
StacyLynn
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Chari
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| Posted: Nov 29 2007 at 12:56am | IP Logged
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Oh, Kathleen, this is such a hard thing. Your story brings me to tears. I have only felt a teeny, tiny dose of what you are saying.......I can imagine the pain.....and it breaks my heart for you. Do stay close to Mary, I think you need the best mother in the world to care for you right now. And, stay close to holy water.
With my tiny dose, we had good results with homeopathic help........a constitutional remedy. I wonder if it could help your fella.
Please keep coming to us with specific prayer requests on this thread, as you work through this........we would love to hold you in prayer, even when you feel you cannot. We will be here for you and your guy, and your family.
LOTSA HUGS and PRAYERS..........wish we could hug you in person.... 
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Dh Marty 27yrs...3 lovely maidens: Anne 24, Sarah 20 & Maddelyn 17 and 3 chivalrous sons: Matthew 22, Garrett 16 & Malachy 11
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St. Ann
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Kathleen,
I will hold you and your family faithfully in my prayers.
Is there such a thing as a spiritual hug?
Come here daily for one or more!
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Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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Dawn
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Oh, Kathleen, I am *so* sorry for what you are going through. We will be praying for your family, and I will pray especially to our Blessed Mother on your behalf.
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Dawn, mum to 3 boys 
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mariB
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During this whole advent and christmas season, I will be praying for you, your son, and your whole family. I just want to hug you right now. Prayer is such a powerful thing. I will pray to St. Dymphna for your son and
praying to St. Michael for God's covering over your family.
Praying that the Holy Spirit will lead you in ALL your decision making.
Blessings,
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marib-Mother to 22ds,21ds,18ds,15dd,11dd and wife to an amazing man for 23 years
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guitarnan
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Kathleen, you're in my prayers. I have a high school friend who went down this path with her son, so although I can't walk in your moccasins, I can well imagine what they look like. I'll pray especially right now for peace in your home and heart...and do take Chari's advice about prayer requests. We're here to help you bear this cross and bring your intentions to our loving Father.
Adding my hugs to Stephanie's...
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Ruth
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Dear Kathleen. You will be in my thoughts and prayers throughout this heavy cross. God bless you.
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Ruth
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amyable
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Praying for you and your whole family!
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hylabrook1
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Dear Kathleen -
Many prayers for all the healing, help, insight, courage, and anything and everything else you and your family need. I will offer the trials of my day for you.
Peace,
Nancy
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msclavel
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Kathleen, this just brought me to tears. I am so sorry. And I can feel how very much you love your dear son. Many prayers for all of you and a very big hug.
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aussieannie
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Praying for your Kathleen, my heart aches, I will remember you and your dear boy and family in my novena for the Immaculate Conception feast day.
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Taffy
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You're in m prayers, Kathleen. Parenting is tough sometimes, more so when "special needs" enter the picture.
Don't beat yourself up over what you could have done differently. I know it's hard not to as I struggle with this too. The truth is, we can't turn back the clock, no matter how hard we try, so focus on dealing with the present and preparing for the future.
Baby is crying, gotta go. Pray lots and I'll keep you in my intentions.
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snowbabiesmom
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God is the Divine Physician and nothing happens by accident. Do not look at the past and the what ifs, but focus on today and the gifts in your home. I will certainly lift your sweet unhappy son up in prayer and for peace to be throughout your home this holiday.
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Caroline
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Praying for your and your family, dear Kathleen.
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Devoted Wife to and Mama to three beautiful boys and another little boy due in September, and two beautiful souls in heaven
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ladybugs
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Oh, dear Kathleen! Praying for you and your dear ones!
Susan said it best when she said, "Don't beat yourself up!"
God knew everything and His Grace is ever-present. While you cannot see it right now, everything WILL BE OKAY.
You will be in my constant prayers.
Sending , too!
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MaryMary
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Kathleen,
Your heartbreaking situation and humble, heartfelt request for prayers just made me cry this morning. You are such a beautiful, caring mother - that is so very evident! Please know that your dear son, and the intentions of your entire family will be at the forefront of my prayers today and for this Advent season to come.
May God give you peace in abundance!
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Mary
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mary theresa
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I am praying so hard for you, Kathleen. I am so sorry and I have no words to say how much I admire you.
If you feel that there is a spiritual attack, use lots of holy water on everyone, every day, and sprinkle blessed salt in the corners of every room. The sense of being protected -- if even just from the feelings of frustration, despair, and guilt -- helps so much.
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Mary Theresa
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Cay Gibson
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Kathleen,
Your cross is so heavy. If there is any way we can help you carry it, even in the middle of the night, please don't hesitate to come to the board and ask. Someone will be here...if nothing else as a cyber-buddy to on.
Thank for sharing your with us.
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Cay Gibson
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JenniferS
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Praying for you, Kathleen.
Jen
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4Real Forums : We Pray to the Lord
Topic: please...
