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sunnyviewmom
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| Posted: Nov 02 2007 at 9:04am | IP Logged
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I recently had my second miscarriage. I am wondering what some of you lovly faith filled women (and your families) do or have done to honor these precious children.
Also, are you aware of any "requirements" that the Church has in this regard?
This is my first time posting, but I have received much inspiration from reading posts. Thanks!
Dana (Sunnyviewmom)
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Maryan
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| Posted: Nov 02 2007 at 9:10am | IP Logged
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Dana,
I'm very sorry -- I too have suffered two miscarriages. A friend recommended this website - Church of the Holy Innocents in New York on the sidebar there is a page to add the name of your unborn child to their Book of Life. Then, I think, they send you a little certificate that you can print in remembrance of your little baby.
I keep hoping that one of these days when I head northeast we'll be able to stop in to this Church.
Personally, I named my babies after the angels -- girl form.  So my first is Angela and my second is Gabriella. My boys pray for them during our family rosary as our "angel babies."
Hope that helps.
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Maryan
Mom to 6 boys & 1 girl: JP('01), B ('03), M('05), L('06), Ph ('08), M ('10), James born 5/1/12
A Lee in the Woudes
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MaryMary
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Dana
I am so sorry about your loss! I miscarried our fourth child three weeks ago. We were fortunate in that I miscarried at home and had his sweet little perfectly intact body to bury. My husband handpainted a little casket for him. In it we also placed letters and pictures to Gabriel (his name) from his three siblings. We had a beautiful burial at a cemetery with our parish priest. At the gravesite after prayers we prayed a decade of the Rosary for those children and their families lost to abortion. I want to repaint another white box and include all of my memories of our fourth child...letters from friends and little mementos including the certificate that Maryan linked to above. This Christmas I want to add a little tiny stocking along with the rest of the family's as a reminder of our child in Heaven. I don't want him to be forgotten, because we know he lives!!!
The only picture we had of Gabriel was our ultrasound picture. We created a "holy card" to pass out to family and friends on the day of his burial. It included his ultrasound picture, a scripture quote ("For thou didst knit me together in my mother's womb, Thou didst form my inward parts. I praise Thee, for Thou art fearful and wonderful") from the Psalms, his name, gestational age and the day we miscarried. I really cherish this little reminder of our saint, and I would encourage anyone to do likewise if they have an ultrasound pic of their little one.
Praying for healing for you, hon!
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Mary
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Kristen in TN
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Dear Donna,
I, too am sorry for your loss. We lost two this year as well, one at 16 weeks and one at 9. We also named our babies and burried them in our orchard where my husband has also done a little landscaping around the graves. We also have our Jesusu, Mary, and St. Francis statues there. We blessed the ground with holywater and we baptized both the babies as well.
Along with the church mentioned above, there is a couple in the UK who started a book. The first volume is in a church in the UK. The second volume is done and they are looking for a church in the US to place it on their alter or sanctuary during Masses. They hope to put the third in Germany. Anyway, here is the website:
http://beehive.thisisplymouth.co.uk/default.asp?WCI=SiteHome &ID=6403
I will keep all of you good ladies in my prayers.
God bless,
Kristen in TN
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Lillian
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Donna,
I miscarried for the first time this summer at about 12 weeks. We named the baby Philomena and had her registered at the above church. My dh also bought me a picture of the Madonna of the Streets and I have it up next to my desk. It is a reminder for me. A memorial picture. But it doesn't make the children or anyone else uncomfortable. It was important to me that I have some tangible memory without fielding lots of questions every time somebody saw it. This is what I came up with.
I'm so sorry for your loss. My children still pray for the baby at night.
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Lillian
Isabelle 9, Anna 7, Sophia 5, Kolbe 4, Catherine 2
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mellyrose
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I'm sorry for your loss :(
When I miscarried, I registered the babe at the Church mentioned above, and after many months we found an angel statue to put in our garden (although she sat in my kitchen for almost a year before I put her outside.) The boys still talk about our angel baby, even though my miscarriage was over 3 years ago.
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Melanie in AZ
Colin (11/00), Nate (05/02), Lydia (04/07)
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CathinCoffeland
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We just got back from the cemetary being all souls day we thought it would be a good day to visit with our little ones with God.
It is such a difficult experience and I am so sorry for your loss.
you mentioned your misscarraige was recent and if you need a burial place ask at your parish.
It never occurred to me to ask until our third misscarraige. here the KofC donate little burial plots for children/babies including miscarried babies.
Father met us and led a very comforting brief service for us .
A friend created a mosaic stone- like a stepping stone with all 3 names tp mark the plot.
it is comforting to have a place to go.
we also recived "certificates of life" from the link above.
it is very comforting for our living dc to be able to say/read their siblings names and talk about them.
God Bless your little ones- Mary keep them
Maggie
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helene
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I have also sent my babies' names and information to the Church of the Holy Innocents in NY. At the time of my loss they were sending back certificates with the child's name on it. Also for a $25 donation to their ministry they would send you a lovely rosary. I treasure mine as something to remember these children by and use it in specially urgent times of prayer, asking them to pray for their poor mother on earth left to survive them.
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Happy Mom to five girls (20,17,13,11and 4) and five boys (19, 15, 10, 8 and 6)
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vmalott
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Dana...I'm so sorry for your losses.
Many Dioceses are recognizing how important it is to honor those babies who have been stillborn or miscarried and are providing space in their cemeteries for burial. With our third miscarriage last year, we went ahead and did just that (Arch. of Cincinnati, free of charge), and though it took a while for it to be placed, there is also a marker at the gravesite. It provided a real sense of closure for all of us.
For the other two we've lost, we have also done the Church of the Holy Innocents certificates as well as having a memorial brick placed at our former parish. If your church has a grotto or a memorial garden or some such place, this may be a nice way to memorialize your precious baby.
It helps to have something tangible, a place to go, to remember, even if it is just carving out a little place in your garden for a statue or memento.
My mother also miscarried three children, but that was during a time when discussing loss and naming those lost babies was uncommon. Unlike my mother, I have made a concerted effort that my children know and understand that there are three little souls in heaven who are their brothers and sister whom they have not yet met. They talk about these babies very naturally, as a part of our family.
God bless,
Valerie
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Valerie
Mom to Julia ('94), John ('96), Lizzy ('98), Connor ('01), Drew ('02), Cate ('04), Aidan ('08) and three saints in heaven
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sunnyviewmom
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Thanks for all of the wonderful and comforting responses. I had no idea that anything like the shrine exsisted and I have already sent in the names of my children. Thanks especially for the prayers. I will be remembering all of you and all who have lost little ones in my prayers also. God Bless You.
Dana
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4Real Forums : Domestic Church
Topic: Honoring Miscarried Children
