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hopalenik Forum Pro
Joined: Nov 17 2006 Location: Connecticut
Online Status: Offline Posts: 230
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Posted: Aug 14 2007 at 2:24pm | IP Logged
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Hi,
We are having some troubles with our son. Tara is 8, the twins Josh and Nadia are 6, Tegan is 3, and Keara is 1. Josh is the only son, grandson on both sides of the family, and he has a long and convoluted medical history (including transplantation, and partial hearing loss, 31 week preemie). Josh was rather spoiled and is very strong will, our aethistic doctor said the ONLY reason Josh is alive was because of the strength of his will as a baby.
So now we live off in the woods with no real neighbors and zero boys to play with, our homeschooling friends with boys either don't leave the house or live far away, and JOsh is dying for regular boy interaction. He is stuck (some days) playing My Little Pony and Strawberry Shortcake with his sisters when he really wants to be driving cars around and playing baseball. So often, I know that the fights he picks with his sisters are done out of boredom and frustration instead of real"meanness".
We set up a regular playdate with some friends for every Friday but do you have any thoughts on what to do with him the rest of the week? I am at a loss because I grew up in a completely girl centered environment...no brothers, no boy neighbors, and only 1 boy cousin. I don't know what to do with little boys and I get frustrated with his behaviour at times but I know in my heart that some of it would be alleviated if he had more regular contacts with other boys to get out some of the energy?
Help!
Holly
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missionfamily Forum All-Star
Joined: April 10 2007 Location: Louisiana
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1859
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Posted: Aug 15 2007 at 1:40pm | IP Logged
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I know this is going to sound crazy, but as a mom of five boys, I am crazy! Is there any way you could have a pile of dirt or rocks delivered to your home or pick up a small load of bricks? We do this is the fall when it's cool enough and fill the dirt pile up with dump trucks, rakes, shovels, etc as well as toy soldiers and action figures. The boys play for hours. We also have a stack of bricks in the yard...when they have pent up energy, we challenge them to see how fast they can load the wheel barrow, move the bricks to the other side of the yard, and restack them or use them to build something (these are not huge heavey bricks mind you...it's quite possible). The boys love it.
__________________ Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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teachingmyown Forum All-Star
Joined: Feb 20 2005 Location: Virginia
Online Status: Offline Posts: 5128
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Posted: Aug 15 2007 at 3:03pm | IP Logged
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I have two sons, 16 and 9, and five daughters, 11, 7, 5, 4 (today!) and 15 months. My 16 yr old goes to school, and even when he is around, he doesn't spend much "guy time" with my 9 yr old.
So, my 9 yr old deals with the same frustrations. We don't have neighbors and very rarely get together with other families. The one thing that has saved him is the trampoline. He goes out there by himself, sometimes for an hour or more, and has imaginary battles with Orks and various other "bad guys". He gets his energy and aggression out without hurting anyone real. When he has that outlet, he is more able to hang out peacefully with his sisters playing gender-neutral stuff like Kapla and Lincoln Logs. He does also get to play video games, which are another outlet for him.
There are days he cries about having "all these sisters". I feel sad for him, but have to be confident in God's plan for our family. I am pregnant with another boy now, which is thrilling, but how nice it would have been to have them closer together.
Good luck and God bless!
__________________ In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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hopalenik Forum Pro
Joined: Nov 17 2006 Location: Connecticut
Online Status: Offline Posts: 230
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Posted: Aug 15 2007 at 9:26pm | IP Logged
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Thank you.
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stacykay Forum All-Star
Joined: April 08 2006 Location: Michigan
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1858
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Posted: Aug 16 2007 at 7:58am | IP Logged
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Is your dh home much? Is there a special time he could set aside and do "guy" stuff with ds?
A movie, museum trip, hike, tossing a football, lunch out, ??????
As far as boy activities, I second Colleen. I don't know what it is with boys, but mine love the dirt. They could spend all day digging holes, filling them with water, and driving their matchbox cars and such through them. They use the ferns as a jungle and play "Jurassic Park." Give them a stick and they can invent a "Lord of the Rings" sort of play.
Shooting hoops and dribbling a soccer ball can be done alone. Are organized sports a possibility?
They can also spend hours with their legos.
And last, reading. My boys are either running around outside, playing legos, a board game, or reading.
God Bless,
Stacy (mum to 6 ds)
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wifemommy Forum All-Star
Joined: July 10 2006
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Posted: Aug 16 2007 at 10:09pm | IP Logged
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My son 1 boy 5 girls here has the younger girls play cars, trains etc with him....though in exchange he has had to play the dad a few times. Annie
Oh yes Dirt is good for everyone
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juststartn Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007 Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1321
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Posted: Sept 03 2007 at 5:17pm | IP Logged
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This is why I was so glad that when I found out I was having a boy, I also found out it was twins....with three girls already, "ahead" of them, well, it was a good thing that there were two....
Rachel
__________________ Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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missionfamily Forum All-Star
Joined: April 10 2007 Location: Louisiana
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1859
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Posted: Sept 04 2007 at 9:00pm | IP Logged
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Except now you'll need TWO piles of dirt!!!
__________________ Colleen
dh Greg
mom to Quinn,Gabriel, Brendan,Evan, Kolbe, and sweet St. Bryce
Footprints on the Fridge
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snowbabiesmom Forum All-Star
Joined: March 29 2007 Location: Maryland
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1154
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Posted: Sept 08 2007 at 10:57pm | IP Logged
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I have four girls, (10,5,3,6mth) and a boy. My son is 7 and wished his brother could have lived here on earth. ( We delivered him at 4 months to God) Now I think he prays for a brother, but if so,there will be a gap too.
My ds loves to draw and build. He probably creates something from Tinkertoys everyday. His sisters will join in. We also recently bought Battleship ...he loves it and the girls want to play right with him. We see boys in the homeschool group on Fridays, but during the week, its usually us.
I am sure I am not much help, but right there with ya.. God has a plan and His plan is always good.
__________________ Kaleigh'97,Brett'00,McKenna'02,Reesie'04,Madelyn'07
+Luke'05,+Mark'08,+Karoline'08
+Matthew '09,
Nico'13;Zelie Oct'14, *Mary Joseph Jan'16
God's Canvas
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juststartn Forum All-Star
Joined: Jan 17 2007 Location: Oklahoma
Online Status: Offline Posts: 1321
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Posted: Sept 09 2007 at 7:59am | IP Logged
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I don't know if this will help, but my DH was the first boy after 6 girls in a row (there were two much older brothers, but they were in high school--or close to it--when DH was born). He did have a brother when he was three, and then another sister...but he got most of his 'man' activity outside of the family.
I don't mind the dirt. They can use their Tonka dump trucks to haul it around the yard to fill in all of those holes! That their sisters dig, of course. LOL.
Or the dogs we will at some point end up having, I am sure. LOL.
Anyway, I am just glad that they already have each other to play with, given family history. I have no brothers, and Dh has 3 bros and 9 sisters....
Rachel
__________________ Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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