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angiesherm
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 5:19pm | IP Logged
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Hi ladies, I'm in need of some advice!
I have a neighbor who is a VERY strict Southern Baptist. I really like her, but she is ALWAYS trying to convert me and I have told her several times to basically leave me alone on the subject. Well, she is trying her hardest to get my kids to go to their vacation bible school. I cringe when I even think of this to be honest with you. I had a very bad experience with this growing up. My best friend was Baptist and I went with her to vacation bible school ONE time and they were bad mouthing Catholics...I was sick by this. So, anyway, do I tell my neighbor about my negative experience and that there is no way my kids are going or do I just politely say no, but then have her kids bugging my kids asking why they can't go??? I'm just not sure how to handle the situation. I do know that my kids will NOT be going....that's the one thing I'm positive about!
Thanks in advance! I need help!!! 
God Bless,
Angela
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Angela in KS.,
wife to Dave, Mom to Brett (10)Ryan (8),Hallie (3)and Emily (born 6-19-08)
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Martha
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 5:38pm | IP Logged
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There are some people you just have to be rude to to be heard, kwim?
"No, we're Cathoilc and going to a baptist/protestant vbs would not be appropriate under any circumstances. Thank you for the kind thoughts though."
Or
You could cross yourself and turn away mutterring the fatima prayer everytime she starts trying to converts you. 
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Martha
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mom2mpr
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 5:41pm | IP Logged
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Angela,
I have been there and done that when living in VA. I felt bad but just kept saying "no." Ds was young enough it didn't matter to him though. The mom got the idea, though her ds kept asking if my ds could go to Awana so he could get church $$ to go to the church store(grrrrrrr). Fortunately, ds always had "something" to do at that time so an excuse was handy. It could be tougher when the kids are older and need a better reason for their friends. For the VBS week I'd plan some really cool field trips
Hope that helps a little...
Anne
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DivineMercy
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 6:20pm | IP Logged
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My response may seem counterproductive, but it helps in my family where we are the only Catholics and we don't have many Catholic friends. How many things have you invited your neighbor to? Do you occasionally invite her to mass, adoration, First Friday/Saturday service? Whenever we are invited by friends or family to attend something at their church, I always invite them to come to visit with us. (So far the only time anyone has accepted our invite was for our sons' baptisms and once my dad came to impress his girlfriend.) And any time a friend tells me they are church shopping, I make a point to make sure they know our doors are always open.
And definitely pray to the Holy Spirit to enlighten you.
Michelle
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Red Cardigan
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 6:25pm | IP Logged
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This is one of those times where I think you just say "no" and mean it. That's really hard to do, I know. And your kids could just repeat, "I'm sorry, but my mom said "no.""
If you share your bad experience it may just make her more eager to "prove" to you that things aren't like that nowadays, and she may ramp up the pressure to get you to let your kids go.
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Maturemomg
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 8:19pm | IP Logged
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This is one of those times when you can really "use" your dh as head of the family.
"My husband said no." Plainly and simply. Should she continue to badger you, tell her she will have to discuss it with him.
Also effective is to simply say no. Not no, because x, y, z. Just no.
Prayers for you.
Yours in Christ,
Kathy
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Patty
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| Posted: June 25 2007 at 8:36pm | IP Logged
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I'd be polite but firm and direct. If you aren't, she will probably keep bugging you about it. And you could always invite her to Mass or to a Catholic adult class or talk. 
Maybe you could bury a holy medal in her yard as well.
God bless,
Patty
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doris
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| Posted: June 26 2007 at 5:28pm | IP Logged
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The thing is, she might think that you and your dc are going to hell, so no wonder she's persistent.
I'm not joking. I used to be an evangelical and have been to prayer meetings where people prayed for their 'friends and relations who are going to hell'. Catholics were explicitly included in that. 
No offence meant to Protestant readers who don't feel like that. Just my experience.
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Mackfam
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| Posted: June 26 2007 at 9:38pm | IP Logged
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I agree with Kathy! I'm such a wimp when it comes to things like this, and am SO grateful to be able to respond simply, "I'm sorry, my husband said no." It seems to diffuse a lot of tense situations, because people generally don't know how to respond, and if they do, you simply refer them to your husband - mine's NOT shy about confrontations! Works with the kids too, then they can say as well, "daddy said no." There don't need to be reasons.
I empathize with you - we live in Alabama, and this is an everyday issue for us. You have my prayers.
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Bella
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| Posted: June 27 2007 at 11:38pm | IP Logged
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Oh my! I have BTDT many times.
Does your Parish or Diocese offer some type of religion camp over the summer?
If so, enroll them(visitors are always welcome!) and tell your friend that that is enough. If not, you could bring together friends from your parish and create a mini Bible/faith retreat-and let your neighbor know her dc are invited. Either way, get the message across clear that your dc will attend a Catholic *only* camp.
I love the idea of burying a Medal in the yard!
Warmly,
Christy
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juststartn
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| Posted: June 28 2007 at 6:08pm | IP Logged
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doris wrote:
The thing is, she might think that you and your dc are going to hell, so no wonder she's persistent.
I'm not joking. I used to be an evangelical and have been to prayer meetings where people prayed for their 'friends and relations who are going to hell'. Catholics were explicitly included in that.
No offence meant to Protestant readers who don't feel like that. Just my experience. |
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Shoot,I have relatives like that. Don't know if they know about my conversion, but they were very explicit about the eternal destination for the dc, who were baptized 3+ yrs ago. Oh yeah. My evil little four yr old is going to rot in hell if she died the day after her baptism--because it was a CATHOLIC baptism...sheesh.
Rachel (who lives in NC, and SOOO kwym about the protestant mindset)
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Betsy
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| Posted: June 28 2007 at 8:24pm | IP Logged
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My evil little four yr old is going to rot in hell if she died the day after her baptism--because it was a CATHOLIC baptism...sheesh.
[/QUOTE]
You should just tell them that ALL valid Baptism's are Catholic (wether they are done in the Catholic Church or not).
Let's pray for all of the Holy Soul's in Purgatory that were outside the Church on Earth. They have no one to pray for them...
Betsy
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melanie
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| Posted: June 30 2007 at 1:46pm | IP Logged
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Oh, we've been there too! Being Catholic in Arkansas is pretty wild.  I agree with the "my husband said no" idea. I love to use my husband this way, and he doesn't mind. If she pushes it, I'd just say, "We are involved in activities in our own church. You are welcome to join us there though!" 
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juststartn
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| Posted: June 30 2007 at 2:14pm | IP Logged
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Betsy wrote:
My evil little four yr old is going to rot in hell if she died the day after her baptism--because it was a CATHOLIC baptism...sheesh.
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You should just tell them that ALL valid Baptism's are Catholic (wether they are done in the Catholic Church or not).
Let's pray for all of the Holy Soul's in Purgatory that were outside the Church on Earth. They have no one to pray for them...
Betsy[/QUOTE]
LOL, Betsy, if I had ever been present when that had happened, I would have been glad to. But I was getting it thru the grapevine...sigh. I haven't seen them in years...
Doesn't help I have CoC relatives who are preachers...(and boy do they preach! )
Rachel
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: What would you do??? HELP!
