4Real Forums: care/hospice assistance?

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Topic: care/hospice assistance?

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ALmom
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Joined: May 18 2005
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Posted: May 06 2007 at 1:16pm \| IP Logged

I know many of you have been praying for my fil (thank you and please continue these) - and hopefully we are looking at a diagnsosis and easily treatable condition - but we have been awakened to the need to know of long term assistance for the primary caregivers living there in case the need arises. This latest crisis has been exhausting for those there and we couldn't get there to be of any help. We live too far away to be there when help is most needed - ie so far, by the time we get there, the crises is over and while it is nice for the visit, the assistance was really needed the previous week. Also, my dh does have to work - and what if they need long term help? While he could take a few weeks here and there, his job is such that he cannot telecommute and does have to maintain his job here to feed us. They will need assistance at some point and some repite for themselves. How have others handled this long distance. It is probably too late for travel for fil though we keep that question in mind as well. (Hospital flight?)

So here is my question? We are totally unfamiliar with DC. While we know in our area that hospice care involves some wonderful people coming into your home and giving you really good pointers in helping the patient -( in Memphis they made sure my grandmother had oxygen, here they kept us supplied with food for the feeding tube and in both came daily to check vital signs and comfort levels and general nursing care), we do know that hospice can be associated with very anti-life mentalities in some areas? What are they like in DC? We also know where to find safe people to bring into your home to help with physical labor in our area (medical and housekeeping/washing). We've had some experience here with grandparents going through the dying process and the energy and help needed to keep them at home. Is anyone familiar with hospice in DC area to give us some pointers? Also where do people go to get additional assistance in caring for someone (even a good housekeeper?) There is no church connection here so that eliminates the first place we'd generally look for advice and information. Anyone from the DC area with any knowledge - good or bad, if you wouldn't mind PM us
with specifics of where we might look so there are some avenues/plans in place in case of immediate need, that would be so appreciated!!! I am just so unfamiliar with big cities and have no knowledge of the area - and dh hasn't been there - other than to visit parents, of course - since college so we are obviously ignorant of safe, resources that might benefit them. We'd like to try and help them find some of these when we visit shortly and it would be nice to have some inside information before just looking through the phone book or relying on the medical arena which may or may not be pro - life.

Janet

MaryatHome
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Joined: April 03 2007
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Posts: 75

Posted: May 06 2007 at 4:44pm \| IP Logged

I would suggest that your first call be to the Catholic Charities in the area. In many dioceses, the Catholic Charities (or whatever they might call it in a particular area) offers hospice services directly, and if not, will help find Catholic-friendly services. For example, the Catholic Charities in our area offers not only hospice care, but regular home nursing, homemaking assistance, and nursing aides. When MIL was living with us, I had a visting nurse, a bath aide, and respite care from Catholic Charities. They were background checked and bonded, in addition to being lovely people with a commitment to life and a dedication to treating end-of-life issues with dignity and respect.

I would hope that your family has discussed end-of-life issues, and has written them down for clarity.

We also have a service in our county (far far away from DC) known as the Area Agency on Aging. A similar social service agency might be available in that area to help identify local and state programs to assist your family members.

You could also contact their physician for a consultation and direction to resources, as well as the social work department at the hospital they use.

Those are all resources we drew upon in the three and a half years we had MIL in our home.

Blessings as you work out these issues.

Mary

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