Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Glenn
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Posted: June 04 2005 at 2:39pm | IP Logged Quote Glenn


Do any of you seasoned wives/mothers have role models who have inspired you in your Catholic wife/mother journey? It seems that in all the phases of my life I have been able to find role models in literature, but s a newish wife and mother I am having difficulty in finding good role models. Our culture continues to disappoint, and sometimes I find myself lost and alone outside of it.

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Marybeth
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Posted: June 04 2005 at 3:56pm | IP Logged Quote Marybeth

Glenn,

Here are a few saints who inspire me b/c they were mothers themselves.

St. Ann-although her daughter was perfect!
St. Elizabeth
St. Margaret of Scotland
St. Helen
St. Elizabeth Ann Seton
St. Monica
St. Elizabeth of Hungary
St. Gianna

In books I think the mother I would most like to be would be Marmee from Little Woman although most days it is highly unlikely.

I am also blessed to have a very patient,kind and loving example of motherhood from my sister who is ten years older than me.

Marybeth
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JennGM
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Posted: June 04 2005 at 4:44pm | IP Logged Quote JennGM

I'm just a bit old-fashioned My mother, mother-in-law and grandmothers are my role models...and like Marybeth, my sisters (4) provide inspiration for me...although I'm older than all of them, I was one of the last ones to be married, and the last one to start having children! So after years of them asking advice and looking up to me, the roles have reversed!

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Leonie
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Posted: June 04 2005 at 8:03pm | IP Logged Quote Leonie

St Clothilde.

St Clothilde


St Clothilde - EWTN

Leonie in Sydney
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teachingmom
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Posted: June 04 2005 at 11:17pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmom

As a homeschooling mom, I have found some of my best role models among the women here on this message board and in other online email groups to which I have belonged. As I get to know people by reading their posts, I find myself wanting to emulate some of my online acquaintances.

I assume you were looking for living role models too--not just saints and heroines from literature?

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Marybeth
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Posted: June 04 2005 at 11:27pm | IP Logged Quote Marybeth

Irene,

I 100% agree with you about role models being woman on the on-line groups. Yes, thank you so much for pointing that out to us.

I love the fact I can be uplifted night or day by these woman and can be in my pajamas.

God bless,

Marybeth
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ALmom
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Posted: June 05 2005 at 12:56am | IP Logged Quote ALmom

In addition to what has already been mentioned, I would include various moms I've seen from many walks.

I remember the homeschooling moms who I have seen stop everything when their husbands walk in the door, the closeness I have seen as these husbands treat their wives like queens and obviously "worship" them. I have watched moms serve and teach their daughters to serve dad and really appreciate him. I watch the particulars for "ideas" on areas to improve for me.

I remember the homeschooling mom with 10 children, who has taught her older to watch the younger. Everyone is a buddy to a younger sibling and are like second mothers to the child. Their whole way is so gentle and full of trust - despite the dad's continued unemployment. I have learned to try and step back more, control less and trust God to take care of the family instead of always wanting things to go according to my dream.

I look at the homeschooling mom who is so careful and prudent before acting - gentle with her children, thoughtful of others (quietly doing little acts showing consideration), careful with her tongue (often leaving the room if a conversation seems personal, refraining from any negative remarks about anyone even though I know certain things must have hurt her badly). I have watched her supervise children on a playground, start to give a command and realize that the child would have too difficult a time with obeying it because of the fun at play and actually acknowledging this and changing the command before the child had a chance to disobey. This mother has not had any teenage rebellion and her children have all been quite couragous in standing up against peer pressure.

I have watched the couple whose husband had encephalitis and was totally bedridden and unable to communicate. She cared for him with great love, understanding without words, and did this for over 7 years until his natural death. She had a Bible study for ladies in her home because she didn't want to leave her husband and we watched how the grandchildren would come and see him and she would joyfully describe the moments her husband spent with these children. I noticed how truly grateful she was for the doctor that would come to the house, the neighbor whom she could call in the middle of the night to help her with soiled sheets, friends, family, God, the fact that her husband was with her. She never seemed mopey or dwelling in pity.

I remember the elderly couple who always seemed to hold hands, the special affection between them even after the husbands stroke.

I also learned from the moms whose children were in ps - how they were so good at establishing routines and their children were always in bed by 8 or 8:30 and how this seemed to anchor the children with a sense of security. I was reminded that even hs, we needed to have more discipline in rising and going to bed. I saw how they stayed a part of all that their children were doing even when the children were in school.

I saw the mom who learned how to play ball because with a baseball fan husband and all sons, thats how she could be with them. The husband taught her how to bat, referee and coach and during the summer she is a part of their fun too.

I remember the nursing mom at a LLL meeting who broke the ice and made everyone feel accepted whether or not everything was done by the book. Everyone was going around the room talking about first foods and good foods for the toddlers and she laughed and said her child's first food was chocolate and it wasn't too bad after all. We all learned a little about laughing at how seriously we were taking ourselves and how we were acting like we were supposed to be perfect moms so our kids wouldn't be scarred for life.

I look at my own mom who will come over to my house and do my ironing that's backed up (because I hate it) and never let on that she hates ironing. How she will imitate my style of parenting with my children and my sister's with my sister's children. How she has always seen the good in everyone.

I remember my grandmother, who just from looking at my grandfather knew how he felt and would respond accordingly and sometimes fuss and fret over him. I know how she changed her entire way of cooking overnight after he was diagnosed with heart problems. This was not a small task for a woman who had cooked since she was 11 in the southern way - with everything seasoned with bacon fat. She managed to find ways to make the food full of flavor and tasting like his favorites.

I guess it is in all the little things and I try to learn from all these wives and moms. I also found a great deal of practical advice from the book Fascinating Womanhood. I think so much of our trouble in the modern world stems from our refusal to acknowledge real differences between men and women and their needs and how traditional roles are part of that. We tend to think husband - head is equivalent to saying wife - doormat when it is not if understood well.

Janet
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Marybeth
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Posted: June 05 2005 at 8:38am | IP Logged Quote Marybeth

Janet,

What a beautiful post! Thank you! I think you have a real gift for seeing the good in others. What a true blessing.

God bless,

Marybeth
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Willa
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Posted: June 05 2005 at 10:07am | IP Logged Quote Willa

Janet,

That was a great post.   That's the truth! I have learned to pick out the thing I like best about the different moms I know -- there's almost always SOMETHING I admire and could use improvement on in myself.   There's a lot of quiet heroism in everyday life if one looks for it; even the "natural virtue" in an unchurched friend. People can be disappointing but they can also be quite remarkable in what they do RIGHT without even the sacramental graces to help them.
Fascinating Womanhood --- is this the book you mention, Janet?



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Glenn
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Posted: June 05 2005 at 3:05pm | IP Logged Quote Glenn

Janet,
Thank you so much for your wisdom. This gives me so very much to think about, and pray about.
Glenn

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ALmom
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Posted: June 05 2005 at 7:12pm | IP Logged Quote ALmom

Willa,

Yes, that is the book, Willa.

Boy, everyone sure is nice with their comments, but I must say I wish I was more like all these moms! I think I'm still in the stage of discovering my faults and still working with them.

Better go as my dh just popped in and wondered why I was sucked into the computer again

Janet
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Posted: June 06 2005 at 11:05pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmom

I came across a great role model for motherhood today in the most unusual place. A friend told me about this wonderful obituary in the Washington Post on Sunday. She found this woman to be so inspiring that she has cut out the obituary and put it on her refrigerator!

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Erica Sanchez
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Posted: June 07 2005 at 1:49am | IP Logged Quote Erica Sanchez

I love the obituary, Irene. Thank you for posting it. A mother I recently had the pleasure of meeting has 17 children and 114 grandchildren and a few great grandchildren as well!! Her story is similar. What has been said about her is how peaceful she is and that's how she was when I met her. Beautiful!

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teachingmyown
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Posted: June 07 2005 at 5:27pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmyown

Glenn,
I really enjoyed the book The Story of a Family, about the family of St Therese. Her mother Zelie is an inspiration to me.

One of my modern role models is Sally Clarkson. She is not a Catholic but is a faith-filled, gentle mother who has a beautiful gift of inspiring others in that vocation.

She has two books on motherhood, Seasons of a Mother's Heart and The Mission of Motherhood. I highly recommend both books. I also recommend her tape sets because she is a joy to listen too as well as to read. Her website is www.wholeheart.org.

Of course, I will echo what others have said about finding role models here. There are such wise and beautiful women on this board. I wish I could just sit at their feet while they teach their children and learn from them.

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Molly
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Posted: June 07 2005 at 6:07pm | IP Logged Quote Marybeth

Molly,

Funny, you should say you want to sit at people's feet on this forum. You are an inspiration to me!!!!

I'm going to check out Sally Clarkson's website. I wish they had her books in my library system.

Marybeth
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teachingmyown
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Posted: June 07 2005 at 9:09pm | IP Logged Quote teachingmyown

Marybeth,
Are you sure you have the right Molly? I don't feel very inspiring, but thank you.





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Posted: June 07 2005 at 10:02pm | IP Logged Quote Marybeth

Yes, I have the right Molly!

I'm wondering if I should reread the book Janet mentioned. I only was able to read 1/2 this winter. hmmm..something to ponder.

Marybeth
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