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Cheryl
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I find it interesting that both Brenda and Lisa have described their marriages as more ordered from wearing skirts. I will take the advice of praying to Our Lady and not spending too much money until I know what works for me. Speaking of spending money, I am thinking that if I wear skirts I may need to get a different coat. What kinds of coats do you wear? My only coat looks like this except it's red and black. It would probably look silly with a skirt. Trying out skirts may be simpler in the spring. 
I talked with my dh tonight and he said he thought I would look nice in skirts, but they may not be practical...changing diapers, etc. Maybe this will be like our homeschooling discussions. At first he said no way, and now he's all for it.
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Cheryl
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Mom to Matthew 13, Joseph 11, Sarah 10, Rachel 6, Hannah almost 4 and Mary 1
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lilac hill
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I second the paddock boot recommendation. When searching for DD#3 I found plenty of syles with extra insulation for winter.
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Viv
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organiclilac
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Cheryl wrote:
| Speaking of spending money, I am thinking that if I wear skirts I may need to get a different coat. What kinds of coats do you wear? |
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This was one of my big impediments too! I only had a big parka that I've had since high school and it just didn't seem right with skirts. However, my sister just got me a beautiful chocolate brown hooded wool pea coat from JCPenney. Now all I need are some new, less clunky shoes to complete the look!
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Tracy, wife to Shawn, mama to Samuel (4/01) and Joseph (11/11), and Thomas (2/15)
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JodieLyn
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I wear a columbia parka.. why give up the functionality of that for something that may not work near as well.
I also have a cape (made it myself with fleece so not hugely expensive) to wear with a tiny baby and/or when being more dressy.. I love that I can put the baby under the cape right up next to me for warmth :)
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Tina P.
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Elizabeth, what are you going to do when you go camping or working in the yard/garden or *on* the house (as in restructuring it)? How do those of you ladies who wear only dresses or skirts manage in these instances or when, for example, your stomach is just not up to par? I'm having some sort of stomach virus currently and am cozy in sweatpants. Please don't anyone stop by unannounced!  I'm very curious because I have half-heartedly started to build up an informal skirt/dress wardrobe, but I have yet to put it to use.
Stockings I can't stand at all. Has to be a super special occasion for me to wear them. I can barely stand tights. These are really warm ones. However, even in cotton tights my legs feel like they're suffocating. I prefer to wear leggings and socks.
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
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JodieLyn
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I think the main thing is to have functional dresses/skirts.. just like every pair of pants isn't going to be functional for every job.. neither is every skirt.
A lightweight full skirt is NOT a good idea around an open campfire for instance.. but then you probably aren't wearing the equivelent in pants either..
Something like an a-line skirt.. on the long side, in a heavier fabric.. such as denim.. works just as well for the majority of the jobs you listed as jeans... better if it has good pockets.. so much more room in skirt pockets than jeans 
Long skirts are more funtional for many things.. you can also get away with knee high nylons instead of panty hose.. trouser socks or knee high socks for everyday wear. My favorite winter combo for under my skirts is silk long underwear with socks and boots.. tights not needed. My skirts come to at least mid-calf.
There are some things that you get used to.. how you move is slightly different than if you're wearing pants, and once you get used to moving with your skirts instead of fighting them.. it makes everything easier..
and as far as comfy.. I have some wonderful "loungers" in flannel, with a loose high waist and full skirt that are VERY comfy and put no pressure at all on my tummy.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
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BrendaPeter
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Cheryl wrote:
| Speaking of spending money, I am thinking that if I wear skirts I may need to get a different coat. What kinds of coats do you wear? |
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I own this cape in black. It's not super warm but I usually wear a long-sleeved long underwear t-shirt, a turtleneck and a wool sweater under it. Can you tell I love to layer ?
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BrendaPeter
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Elizabeth wrote:
| Is ever a skirt just not appropriate? |
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Possibly. Of course, Blessed Gianna wore ski pants.
More than answer your question though Elizabeth, for quite a while now I've been wanting to compliment you on how absolutely beautiful you looked at 40 weeks pregnant. Besides the lovely skirt, I absolutely love your longer hair. Wearing skirts has inspired me to grow my hair longer also (yes, another "curly girl"!). It only took me 42 years (!!) but between the skirts & the hair, I've never felt so feminine in my whole life!
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Brenda (mom to 6)
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BrendaPeter
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For those of you considering wearing skirts, I thought I might mention that probably the biggest inspiration for me was my daughter. I desired for her to wear dresses exclusively, although I still wore pants. One day it struck me that if I wanted her to wear dresses, than I needed to dress more femininely as well.
God has blessed us with 3 daughters. In our culture, I believe it gives tremendous witness to others when the 4 of us are all in dresses/skirts.
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Brenda (mom to 6)
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Helen
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Over the weekend we watched a library video about Mt Rainier
I took special note when they showed footage of the first woman to climb Mt Rainier:
Fay Fuller in 1890
She was wearing a big dress and used a walking stick.
Here's a picture.
Does it seem to you that women nowadays exclusively wear pants? To me it seems that skirts are thought of as special occasion wear. I think this is a relatively modern idea - 40 to 50 years old at most. Women have always done great things wearing dresses. Didn't the pioneer women cross the prairies, make fires, take care of their children, build houses - all in dresses? Compared to them, loading the dishwasher or using water running from the bathtub faucet to clean the bathtub seems rather easy.
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Elizabeth
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Did you know that the leading cause of death for colonial women was by fire? Their skirts caught fire. That said, we're not usually cooking over an open fire,so I'm not too worried about that. I do have ski pants and I'm not planning to give them away. And I have a pair of pants I reserve for visits to the chiropractor. I think he and I are both more comfortable having him manipulate my body while I'm in pants and not a skirt  . I haven't been camping since deciding to make dresses and skirts the norm. But I remember Chari camping with us in a denim jumper. We'll see when the time comes. I did do a nature outing the other day in a skirt. I froze. I really do need to prepare better for the cold. It's just a really bad time of year to be trying to come up with extra funds for silk underwear and decent boots. My jeans (all paid for...) taunt me from the storage room...I'm going to have a talk with my husband about this tonight. It's a matter of philosophy meeting economics now...God knows the state of our finances. I'm sure He'll help me figure this out.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Lisbet
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One of the things that I did have to change was how I moved and worked during the day. It was a GOOD change though, I move more feminine and gentle. I'm more deliberate and thoughtful about how I sit, stand, chase my toddlers, etc... I think that was a big part of the positive change in our marriage.
I thought I was feminine before, ya know, having babies and breastfeeding and all, pretty girlie stuff! But it's amazing how being feminine in the little everyday things changed me and the general 'tone' of our household.
Over the summer while gardening, hiking, and biking I wore some fluid gauchos or a split skirt. I could probably do all of that in a longer, fluid A-line skirt. I'm pretty short, so nearly everything is long on me. Summer and spring are easier on me in the way of dresses, but I've been doing good so far this fall too. Those silk long johns (janes?) Michele linked to from Dharma are pretty inexpensive, I may try a pair of those!
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Helen
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Elizabeth wrote:
| Did you know that the leading cause of death for colonial women was by fire? Their skirts caught fire. |
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I didn't know that!
Elizabeth wrote:
| But I remember Chari camping with us in a denim jumper. |
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I do this.
Elizabeth wrote:
| My jeans (all paid for...) taunt me from the storage room. |
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What about wearing the jeans under a skirt? The friars wear clothes under their habits.
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MicheleQ
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Tina P. wrote:
| How do those of you ladies who wear only dresses or skirts manage in these instances or when, for example, your stomach is just not up to par? I'm having some sort of stomach virus currently and am cozy in sweatpants. Please don't anyone stop by unannounced! I'm very curious because I have half-heartedly started to build up an informal skirt/dress wardrobe, but I have yet to put it to use. |
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I'm not a skirts/dresses only gal (I do wear skirts or dresses a good bit but I also wear slacks and jeans) so take my comment for what it's worth. Actually, I did go through a time about 8 years ago where I only wore skirts but over time I have become less strict about it and comfrtable with the balance I have settled on now. It's something I have brought to prayer many times in fact and truly I do feel God thinks it's OK for me to wear pants too (as does dh). 
A very good friend of mine came from the Mennonite tradition before becoming Catholic. She was what we call "Old Order" in that they wore only cape dresses and black stockings. She still wears primarily skirts but I have on occasion seen her in pants - generally when she is cleaning, exercising or not feeling well and lounging around the house. (For a while after becoming Catholic she still covered her head at all times- as she grew up doing but now only does so at mass). She and I have had this conversation (about modesty and skirts/dresses only) many times. Coming from a tradition that held salvation was linked to what you wore, I think she has struck a very good balance and doesn't spend time fretting about wearing pants of she sees the need to. And you know, she truly is one of the most feminine women I know.
In anything we do that isn't a matter of faith and morals we need to keep a balanced perspective. If you need to wear pants, wear them. Of course be modest but don't let yourself become so worried about the fact that you aren't wearing a skirt that you lose sight of what's important (being modest and feminine - and yes I do think you can be modest and feminine in pants too). The point is that we need to remember to keep the "spirit" of what we are trying to accomplish without becoming slaves to the "law" of it. If it's stealing your joy or drawing your focus from other important things then it needs to be revaluated.
God bless!
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Michele Quigley
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MicheleQ
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Elizabeth wrote:
| Did you know that the leading cause of death for colonial women was by fire? Their skirts caught fire. |
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Yes and it is still one of the leading causes of death and disfigurement in India.
Quote:
| My jeans (all paid for...) taunt me from the storage room...I'm going to have a talk with my husband about this tonight. It's a matter of philosophy meeting economics now...God knows the state of our finances. I'm sure He'll help me figure this out. |
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My suggestion would be to wear them as needed and stop leting it worry you. But if you really don't want to I would then get rid of them. Sell them or gift them but don't let them taunt you!
God bless,
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Michele Quigley
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Cheryl
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BrendaPeter wrote:
| For those of you considering wearing skirts, I thought I might mention that probably the biggest inspiration for me was my daughter. I desired for her to wear dresses exclusively, although I still wore pants. |
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Last Friday I asked my dd to wear pants to go in a large playscape, but she wouldn't listen to me. She had her mind set on a skirt. She is so feminine. Maybe I should follow her example.
For the first time in years I really want to grow my hair out. What is happening to me?
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Cheryl
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Mom to Matthew 13, Joseph 11, Sarah 10, Rachel 6, Hannah almost 4 and Mary 1
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Tina P.
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I own this cape in black.[/QUOTE]
That's a beautiful cape, Brenda. I have a stadium jacket and a ski jacket (though I don't ski). I need to reassess.
MicheleQ wrote:
| In anything we do that isn't a matter of faith and morals we need to keep a balanced perspective ... and yes I do think you can be modest and feminine in pants too. The point is that we need to remember to keep the "spirit" of what we are trying to accomplish without becoming slaves to the "law" of it. If it's stealing your joy or drawing your focus from other important things then it needs to be revaluated. |
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Thank you, Michele. I had a friend who told me that she and her very active daughters wear skirts at work and at play (but they never *did* go camping ) because, in her words, "People can hardly tell the difference between women and men anymore. Someone has to create a gap. Someone has to show that we are feminine." She's telling me this while I'm standing there in jeans, cramming a spade into the earth, trying not-so-gently to uproot chrysanthemums out of the earth, caked in mud face and all, lugging a wagon overly full of these plants and dirt. I took her words to heart.
I think I could manage to wear skirts and leggings in winter and be bare legged or wear shorts/capris under them. But leggings are tricky where fit is concerned. I bought two from the same company and they fit me so differently that I wore one through parts of my pregnancies and postpartum (it's now worn out) and the other after I'm back down to normal size. I'm just an overgrown kid having to wear pants under my skirts.
But there are times when we're driving along and we see someone jogging. My husband says, "Is that a man or a woman?" Judging by the arms and legs we see and sometimes the stubble on the chin, it's definitely a man. But the hair and clothes appear a woman's. It's not only women crossing the appropriate lines.
God bless,
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Tina, wife to one and mom to 9 + 3 in heaven
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Mrs.K
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This is a very interesting thread as it is at least three or so topics being discussed at once! It is also very interesting that this is a topic that seems to keep re-surfacing on these boards.
Elizabeth, who started it all, everyone has given you great ideas on layering to keep warm. If it is your feet that freeze while out at a game, then that's a problem you need to solve whether you are in pants or a skirt. While you said we may not deserve to always be 'comfortable' in our clothes, and there are many ways to think of 'comfortable', you certainly need to keep comfortably warm. You don't want to get sick! While it is nice to have quality footwear, if finances are tight just get whatever is WARM! And remember all of those lovely catalog items are so much cheaper right after Christmas, sometimes as soon as the 26th. Right now my daughters are enjoying http://www.landsend.com/cd/ov/prod/0,1467,2_17273_52597_1778 9_134097_112544_,00.html?sid=4626135964290180020&CM_MERCH=PA GE_17789these boots for everyday wear and you can't beat that price!
Tina, you asked about being comfortable when sick. I can't imagine wearing anything around my middle when I am sick or pregnant! It has to be jumpers or dresses and socks. Nothing as nauseating, to me anyways, than a waistband!
Cheryl, I think Our Lady is what is 'happening' to you! I second all of the wonderful advice others gave you. The thing that really is decisive is having daughters, like Brenda mentioned. Going anywhere with a bunch of girls in skirts is definitely in the world but not of the world. Years ago my dh realized he likes his girls looking like girls and that really settled it for us. Go slowly and see where you end up - or rather, what you end up wearing!
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amiefriedl
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I'm sooo glad I stumbled on to this conversation. I've been slowing adding skirts to my wardrobe because of these occasional talks. I hadn't realized how many of you were still working hard at all of this. I don't have the time to check the blogs - though OHHH I wish I did!
It is so hilarious to read your comments to because I've been going through the SAME dilemmas. Those links provided are great. I'm going to stock up on silk underclothing asap. And look for a fashionable long coat and good boots. It is all a very expensive process though. I find that as each little thing in my wardrobe is spruced up that the next thing needing fixing starts to glare out. NOT to mention bringing my girl's wardrobes up to speed. But they do love it. (I shudder thinking of all my pants in my maternity wardrobe - I'll wear them because it is all I have!)
Like others, I started at the thrift store, found my favorite new stores and then realized that my penny loafers and tennis shoes and short casual jackets weren't going to work anymore quite so well.
Then there IS that ironing board! I had to run out and buy starch and a new cover for the board itself. Spiritual talks on CD are THE way to go when ironing though - I spent even more $$ stocking up on good talks to listen to during the new ironing times. It has been great.
I tossed all my tighter jeans out, still have the loose fitting ones. Just buying skirts now though to replace them. I doubt I'll ever go pants-free though, there are times and places for them. But it is a great adventure finding my feminine side one clearance sale at a time!
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Amie
Blessed with an awesome hubby and Mom of ds10, dd7, dd3 and dd 10months.
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Elizabeth
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amiefriedl wrote:
(I shudder thinking of all my pants in my maternity wardrobe - I'll wear them because it is all I have!)
...But it is a great adventure finding my feminine side one clearance sale at a time! |
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I started over with maternity clothes this last time, because I'd given all mine away, thinking we were finished. I found skirts much more practical. One skirt really could take me from the beginning to into postpartum...
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Tights? Boots?Modesty when it's cold
