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Katie
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Posted: April 27 2006 at 11:43pm | IP Logged Quote Katie

Make-up: Most days I wear a light foundation or tinted moisturizer, and some lipstick (a very neutral shade). When I want more ba-bing I change the lip colour and maybe add mascara or a tiny bit of blush.

Hair: I have dead straight hair I'm thinking about growing out to shoulder length again. I miss being able to put it up. Right now it is in a sort of flippy style and I do like it. It is really easy to "style". I wash it, run a little styling gunk through it, let it dry a bit while I do my make up or brush my teeth, then turn my head upside down and spray a bit of hairspray on it. Total time: about 60 seconds. I can blow dry it or style it differntly for a special occasion.

No grey (yet).

Once or twice a week I have a bath after the kids go to bed. Other days I try and hop in the shower before dh leaves for work or I find it doesn't happen at all. I only wash my hair twice a week.

A trip to the salon is a great idea, but don't do anything drastic. My dh thinks the 5mo hair blahs is hard-wired in just like all the other hormonal and physical changes we all know and love. Twice I went and chopped most of my hair off at 5mo post-partum, but I think I've finally learned my lesson. A trim and a bit of colour might be the way to go until this passes.

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Posted: April 27 2006 at 11:43pm | IP Logged Quote Jenny

A quick thought about the gray hair issue. A woman a church with salt & pepper hair said she used to color her hair. One day she went to the hospital to visit a friend who had been in there for a while & was SHOCKED by her gray roots and "black" hair. She said she decided that day to stop coloring her hair.

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 6:04am | IP Logged Quote mary


when i turned 40, i decided that i was done with frumpiness. i had let things get out of hand during the past 8 childbearing years and wanted my next decade to be different. so, i'll tell you what i'm doing now (at almost 8mo pregnant and soon 41 and i like it so much better.)

if i'm going out, i put on my make up. i use bare minerals and love the stuff. you look good but don't feel made up.

i wear my hair shoulder length and do not clip it back. it doesn't look as nice. i do not have gray, but if i did, i would have it colored in a salon.

i spend 30-45min on personal appearance each day. that includes shower, lotion, hair, makeup and dressing. sometimes i'm faster, but that's pretty average.

with little ones (my youngest is almost 3) i used to wait for them to sleep but the problem is that i find other things more important - cleaning up or reading books. my appearance came in last or i didn't even get a shower that day. now, i start the day off with the shower and i feel much better about taking a bit of time to look nice.   my dh greatly appreciates it as well.

what i struggle with is finding the time to exercise. i used to walk in the mornings and would love to get back to that. do you have any tips on getting that in?
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esperanza
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Posted: April 28 2006 at 6:57am | IP Logged Quote esperanza

I'm not postpartum. I'm roly poly... maybe the biggest at 28 wks pregnant I have ever been before stage.

Do you wear makeup every day?
   I just starting using Arbonne facial products...stress has aged me quite. I use their light foundation and touch of eye liner daily.

Do you wear your hair long or short and if you prefer it a certain way, why?
   I have had my hair on the short side for many years. I don't do hair well . I have this amazing sister that is a hairdresser. (She does homeschool haircuts...rotating in homes in Manassas, Woodbridge and Stafford) My sis colors my grey with an herbal semi perm. dark brown, my natural. She waxes my lip and brows at the shop where she works. The best part is she perms my hair at her cost of chemical so I have a quick and easy wash-gel-go hair style. I am truly all thumbs at hair and can't even blow dry it to look good. If I had to pay full price for these products I don't think it would happen too often. I sometimes try to imagine my dh perming my hair? My sister is great about making house calls and I have been at her shop postpartum with baby under the cape nursing during hair appts more times that I can remember.

How much time do you spend on personal appearance in general each day?
   5- 10 minutes to gel or mousse my hair scrunch and go...moisturize and light foundation...My 17 yo dd is quite encouraging and gives me make-up tips when i wear it which is just to add eye shadow and tinted gloss ( mascara on special occassions..don't like cleaning that stuff off)...she had me buffing my nails a couple times (she bought a kit for me for Christmas) usually she'll grab me late at night when all the little ones are in bed and give me a manicure or pedicure. I would never take the time for this.

Those of you with little ones, do you find it easier to wake up before the children to bathe or shower or wait until they are asleep?
   I shower every morning after I put someone in charge of my 2 yo.

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 7:13am | IP Logged Quote amyable

Do you wear makeup every day?

Not most days. Here and there, often for church, and almost always for anything more special. For anything other than a special day, my makeup usually only consists of mascara and a little powder (if that ) and sometimes some sheer lip color.

Do you wear your hair long or short and if you prefer it a certain way, why?

Hair, hmmm...it bounces back and forth between chin length and a little past my shoulders - and between full (when pg) and pretty straggly (postpartum year). I like it chin length, my dh likes it long - and I keep getting this bee in my bonnet that I'll grow my hair out to make a wig for my daughter (with alopecia). But my hair hits my shoulders, and stops growing! So I give up.

If you are old enough to have grey hair, do you color it? At home or in the salon?

I have some grey. Much more this year than ever before. I probably won't color it. I have this thing about not giving in to fashion just 'cause some magazine or the beauty industry says I should (I'm not saying ANY of you do it like this, but for me, it would only be coloring for that reason - I think staying grey is natural and shows respect for aging). My problem with my grey hairs though, is that they are wiry and not textured like my other hair. I can definitely see the nutty professor or Einstein look in my future!

How much time do you spend on personal appearance in general each day? Probably about 30 minutes but that includes shower, dress, drying hair and not much else.

Those of you with little ones, do you find it easier to wake up before the children to bathe or shower or wait until they are asleep?

I covet my morning showers. Dh knows how important they are to me so we try to work things out that I can at least shower before he leaves for work and he'll maintain crowd control for those 10 minutes.    If it doesn't happen, I stick the baby in the exersaucer, put Signing Time on the laptop, and no one moves for 20 minutes, even the 6 and 8 year olds.


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Mary Chris
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Posted: April 28 2006 at 7:37am | IP Logged Quote Mary Chris

amyable wrote:
I'll grow my hair out to make a wig for my daughter (with alopecia).


I am trying to grow my hair long enough to give 10 inches to Locks of Love. I think it is going to take me a while. When I was skinny I wore my hair very short. I like short hair, technically mine is probably considered short now, but I used to wear it over my ears.
I do not have a daughter with alopecia but a son who is a cancer survivor.

Elizabeth, thank you for your kind compliment. The reason I like to buy jewelry is it looks good no matter what my size.



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Posted: April 28 2006 at 8:15am | IP Logged Quote Rebecca

Katie wrote:
A trip to the salon is a great idea, but don't do anything drastic. My dh thinks the 5mo hair blahs is hard-wired in just like all the other hormonal and physical changes we all know and love. Twice I went and chopped most of my hair off at 5mo post-partum, but I think I've finally learned my lesson. A trim and a bit of colour might be the way to go until this passes.


I almost did the same the other day!    I am glad I decided not to go. My hair is falling out like crazy. I almost hate to brush it or wash it because I lose so much ever time!
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Posted: April 28 2006 at 8:40am | IP Logged Quote amiefriedl

Cheryl wrote:

I take a shower every morning while my dh is home getting ready for work. I love, love, love warm water. Sometimes I sway in the shower for a long time, until my dh comes in and says "You've been in there for 15 minutes!" When he's in a rush I take a 4 minute shower.   


I'm happy to hear someone else feels this way. I feel guilty for taking 20-30 min out of my morning to shower, moisturize and dry my long hair. I feel horrible if I don't shower. The warm water wakes me up and gets my muscles going and feeling clean is so important to me first thing. But I had a mother, sister, mil and sil who don't shower daily so I feel extravagant for doing it.

I hate makeup - always have - except for very special occasions.

I'm an early greyer too (started at 30) and since my husband is almost 10 yrs my senior, I probably won't color it. My mom had to though b/c Dad was only a couple of years older and she would have looked a lot older than him. By age 40 she was complete white-haired. She waited til age 58 to stop coloring it and now it looks right.

I too am adding more skirts (ala DWDignity book) to my wardrobe and so far I've been very pleased. I gave up shorts but can't let go of those awesome capris! Skirts can be lots of fun. I actually feel counter-cultural!

My baby is 9mo old now so I'm through the pp frumpies. Oh but it is soooo real! Exercise - even if very basic and not routine - always helps me feel less frumpy. Oh and stretching after a hot shower is awesome! Makes me feel more tone!

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 9:22am | IP Logged Quote marihalojen

Do you wear makeup every day?
Lip Gloss and Mascara 24/7. I would probably dye my lashes if I knew more about it as I dislike the waterproof mascara's stiffness. Always sunscreen.

Do you wear your hair long or short and if you prefer it a certain way, why?
Long, straight and no bangs. I usually wad it back in a bun with a stick, going for that modern, messy look - right? A day after climbing aboard this vessel I had my bangs in a clip under a doo-rag as the wind blows, blows, blows here and my forehead felt scoured by the hair. Short hair is in my eyes and always has to be cut, every 3-4 weeks max, as my hair grows quickly. All three of us (yes, my husband too!) donated 15+ inches each to Locks of Love last Autumn and dd and I still had hair past our shoulders (dh was buzzed) but I find hair cuts very traumatic so I don't know if I've recovered enough to whack 10+ inches off again.

If you are old enough to have grey hair, do you color it? At home or in the salon?
I vote for coloring hair. If I feel washed out and blah I'll do a bit of Sun-In and immediately received comments on weight loss, same afternoon - best diet out there. Mom always had very, very grey hair and finally colored it when she moved to Hawaii and Dad went bonkers! Couldn't stop telling everyone she looked 20 years younger, so much healthier, and he'd always been the keep it natural sort of man!

Those of you with little ones, do you find it easier to wake up before the children to bathe or shower or wait until they are asleep?
Ummmm, we share 2 showers in a bathhouse with about 20 other people so I usually wait and let those who have to go to work get their showers in first. Actually, what has been working great lately is setting dd a math lesson and then leaving for my shower. Takes care of the silly, time consuming questions (Mommy, what's 2x2 sort) And yes, I hide the answer book all different places, I was a homeschool kid too!



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Posted: April 28 2006 at 10:50am | IP Logged Quote ShawnaB

Great thread...and certainly an issue I am dealing with.

In my "other life" (pre-babies) I loved to feel cute. I am NOT yet old enough for grey hair (31) yet I have a lot of it. I have it professionally colored to my natural shade. I just don't feel wise enough to show all that grey! I've never been able to find a wash and wear style.

I used to love to have my eyebrows waxed, a pedicure, and visit the Macy's makeup counter (although my makeup regime was always very ligh.) I know...vanity, vanity...

These days, since I seem to have no time, I do wash and wear my hair most days (and it looks terrible ) I still use makeup daily, mostly undereye concealer, masquera and lip gloss thrown on a fast as I can.

My biggest "frump" issue is the 15 pounds I need to lose in order to fit into my wardrobe. I am still wearing the same, horrible, faded, sloppy yoga pants I was wearing at full-term! Its hard NOT to by frumpy with those on my body!

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 11:21am | IP Logged Quote PDyer

I have to preface this by saying I have two kids and the youngest is four. When my daughter was a baby everything was different...

Rebecca wrote:
Do you wear makeup every day?


Nearly every day. Mascara, undereye cover up, foundation if I'm in the mood, blush. Lipstick if I'm going out with my husband or to an event. I would feel and no doubt look more pulled together at the end of the day if I refreshened up before my husband comes home, but I can never seem to pull that off.

My sister hardly ever wears makeup and she always looks fresh and healthy. I've had far too many people ask me "What's wrong?" when I go without makeup to go without it except when I'm going to be home all the time...

Rebecca wrote:
Do you wear your hair long or short and if you prefer it a certain way, why?


My hair needs to be short or it looks awful. I have poker straight, heavy hair that has no body. Once it gets to a certain length I can't do anything with it and I don't have time for that. LOL

My sister has lovely wavy hair that she pulls back with fun clips. I think she looks nice and I know it's quick for her.

Rebecca wrote:
If you are old enough to have grey hair, do you color it? At home or in the salon?


I don't have grey hair, but I do highlight in the salon about three or four times a year. Highlighting helps my hair hold a style, so the extra hour periodically pays for itself.

Rebecca wrote:
How much time do you spend on personal appearance in general each day?


Maybe 20-30 minutes? Shower, 10 minutes, style, 10 minutes, makeup 5 minutes? Something like that.



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Posted: April 28 2006 at 11:32am | IP Logged Quote ladybugs

I have dark brown hair with lots of gray....I had my first gray hair at 15 noticed by my sister who was French braiding...

My dad went gray early and I tend to take after his side of the family in that!

I have a very young looking face and while I'm still more brown than gray, it will make for an interesting combo when I'm older - especially if more children are in our future (oh, my poor daughters!)...I vascillate on coloring...my hair is thick but fine and right now the grays are all fine...I don't want to do anything that might change the texture...oh vanity of vanities???

I use a moisturizer and I was in the am and pm...when I go to Mass, I'll apply either lipstick or lipgloss...I like lip gloss for day wear...if we have a special occasion (ie husband's work party), I'll curl my hair (it has some wave) and apply the paint...I know my husband likes it when I look more put together so I'm trying to do that for him....

I shower in the evening after the kids are in bed. It actually helps alot with my allergies - washing a day's worth of pollen right off helps me to sleep!

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 12:55pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

No time to read all the replies but wanted to share my first thought at the subject line...

bright colored shirts with new matching earrings and shoulder length hair with colorful clips/ties

I have fair skin, blue eyes, and darkish brown wavy hair that is decidedly graying. My niece bought me a pair of earrings with cute torquoise beads that bring out the blue in my eyes. I purchased some bright spring colored cotton shirts... new shades of bright greens and blues. I cut my hair to shoulder length and pull it up with colored barrettes (or in a pony with colored ties.) I don't wear make up but put on Burt's Bee's lip shimmer for color.    

I'm at the "feeling frumpy 2" stage. The first hits at around 3-6 months, the second at around a year. I'll hit it again when the baby is two. For me, the key is to not do anything drastic during these phases and to bring on the color and minor changes for relief.

I also keep in mind that I never SEE my friends as frumpy! I see their smiles and laughs, their wit and passion for life, their love for their faith and family. So...I try to remember that hopefully they don't see ME as frumpy either .

Love,



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Posted: April 28 2006 at 3:01pm | IP Logged Quote Sarah

MAKEUP-

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 3:11pm | IP Logged Quote Sarah

MAKEUP-

I always try to wear make-up and feel so much more confident when I do. I wear small amounts of eyeliner, mascara, eyeshadow (natural tones), light blush, lipstick-if dd2 hasn't ruined it.

If I don't get makeup on 1st thing-I run and put it on before dh come home. I'm fair with dark circles and white eyelashes without it. He doesn't say anything, but I still want to be pretty for him Many people have asked me if I'm sick when I don't wear make-up.

Hair-
I cut my own. Its super think and straight, and I've been cutting it myself for years- a basic shoulder-length pageboy. I curl it under and you can't tell its a home-cut .

I also love to put it in a French Twist with a clip and bobby pins. Great when there's no tine to shower.

Somedays I use hot rollers.

No gray yet. I'm not sure what I'll do about it.



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Posted: April 28 2006 at 3:19pm | IP Logged Quote Bookswithtea

I'll be 36 this summer. I feel frumpy a lot of the time, too.

I wear my hair long and it desperately needs a good cut. Its too flat (I was born with zero "fullness"...sigh) and very boring.

I wear light foundation/sunscreen if I'm leaving the house and a bit of mascara. I have one lipstick and I've owned it for some 5 years...goes to show how often it gets used...If I'm home all day I use a bit of cover up and call it good.

I get showers at night when dh is home, 20 minutes or so. I love a long shower. I spend less than 10 minutes most mornings using a hairbrush, a barrette or a scrunchy, and the little bit of makeup I sometimes wear.

I'm finally almost at a normal weight again after a pregnancy where I gained too much (we moved cross country and were in temporary housing and my weight suffered because of it)...WW is awesome as long as one makes a point of eating healthy foods.

I'd like to feel beautiful and maternal every day...you know, like Caroline Ingalls on the TV version of Little House? Doesn't she always look wonderful??? Wearing skirts helps, but I haven't a clue why... Wearing jumpers is comfy but seems to increase the frump factor. I don't own sweats anymore, but when I am sick I have been known to borrow my dh's and an oversized tshirt. I'm still having a hard time giving up bermuda shorts in the summer and jeans in the bitter cold, even though I still feel less frumpy in a skirt.

What is Bare Minerals and why is it different from regular makeup?

I'd love to hear more about the mom with a uniform! lol Sounds like a plan to me. Most of the time I'd just love to put on a uniform and be done with answering the question, "what am I going to wear today?"

Fellow frump,

~Books

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 3:37pm | IP Logged Quote Rebecca

I really am getting some great ideas here Ladies! I think I will whittle my makeup routine to some tinted moisturizer, under eye concealer, mascara and lip gloss. I can do four things! I just look at that big makeup kit full of things I don't use, feel overwhelmed and decide to forget it.

For those of you using mineral make-up, is it like a finishing powder or does it add color as well? I would like to find out more about this product. Where do you find it?

I am also thinking of letting the shoulder length hair grow a bit longer so I can put it back most days in the old standby twist. It is easy and neat but still leaves the options open to wear it long, flowing and glamorous when I go out to the ball or to the Academy Awards . I do like to wear it down now and then when it is long as long as I have the time to style it properly.
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Posted: April 28 2006 at 4:13pm | IP Logged Quote mary

Rebecca wrote:

For those of you using mineral make-up, is it like a finishing powder or does it add color as well? I would like to find out more about this product. Where do you find it?




there was recently a thread in here about the makeup. i like it because it's simple to use (revver upper (which seems to fill the pores), powder foundation, blush, and mineral veil (sets the makeup to give you a giesha like appearance)), it only takes a few minutes to put on, and because i see a whopping difference in how i look immediately without feeling at all made up. i got a basic kit from sephora.com
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Posted: April 28 2006 at 7:57pm | IP Logged Quote JennGM

esperanza wrote:
I have had my hair on the short side for many years. I don't do hair well . I have this amazing sister that is a hairdresser. (She does homeschool haircuts...rotating in homes in Manassas, Woodbridge and Stafford)


Tammy, Her name wouldn't happen to be Sandra? If so, she does a rotation at my sister's house.

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Posted: April 28 2006 at 9:20pm | IP Logged Quote humanaevitae

I am 29 and was very noticably going gray. I've started coloring my hair with a kit from the market. I finally made the plunge once I realized that I was seriously avoiding mirrors and wanting to cry everytime I got ready to leave the house. Coloring gave my mood a huge pick me up.

I also made the decision to not save all my "new" clothes (bought in the last 5 years!) for when I leave the house. I actually went out and bought three shirts to wear for everyday. After a recent baby, I also make it a priority to have one church outfit and one casual outfit that fits and that I feel good in.

I've found that I seem to yell more when my hair is dirty or I haven't put it up, I'm wearing ill-fitting clothes, a bra is poking me, my teeth haven't been brushed recently, etc... Since I don't need extra excuses to lose my temper, the entire family happily gives me 10min in the morning and before supper to fix myself.

When it comes down to it, losing weight makes me feel the best but until that happens a spritz of body spray and an intense teeth brushing works wonders!

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