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Martha
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| Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 8:19pm | IP Logged
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Lisbet wrote:
I will sheepishly admit to lurking her for a LONG time before jumping in.
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I lurked a bit too. Probably not long though. I'm "a fish or cut bait" kind of gal. 
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Martha
mama to 7 boys & 4 girls
Yes, they're all ours!
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alicegunther
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| Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 9:08pm | IP Logged
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Oh, Natalia, I am probably the worst offender when it comes to name dropping and mentioning personal associations! It is one of those things I do without thinking! Please do not feel at all left out because of it! Why, just this afternoon, I was telling Lissa on the phone . . . .
Totally kidding with that last line, but the rest is sincere! (My theory is that a little unexpected humor is the quickest means to an intimate friendship!  )
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Love, Alice
mother of seven!
      
Cottage Blessings
Brew yourself a cup of tea, and come for a visit!
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Genevieve
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| Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 9:24pm | IP Logged
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You know Natalia, I still plan on visiting you since you are so *close* I gotta buy a house first but afterwards....
I know what you mean about online friendships. I'm in the same boat. I take a long time to type out my thoughts. I've been thinking of this reply since this afternoon and I still can't put it eloquently. Friendships take time and a little leap of faith. At least that is what I keep telling myself.
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Genevieve
The Good Within
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Cindy Mac
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| Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 10:26pm | IP Logged
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I haven't been as involved in the board as I would like - seeing as how I had all of those problems in the final trimester of my most recent pregnancy. That being said, I really feel a part of this community despite not posting as often as others. I felt it with all of the prayers that people said for me and for my son. And almost all of these women wouldn't know me if they ran into me on the street.
As far as translating well into reality, I can't really comment a lot, but I can say for a fact that Elizabeth translates seamlessly into reality. She is exactly as she portrays herself and her life in both her posts on 4real and in her blog. I got to know her through our involvement in church. In fact our first "real" conversation came at the installation of the Knights of Columbus council at our church. Both of us were nursing babies and we were out in the "cry area" and just struck up a conversation. I was so impressed with how open she was with me and have enjoyed cultivating our friendship ever since. I hadn't even thought about homeschooling until I started talking to her about it. She let me read her book and has been so gracious in being my friend and guide.
All this being said, I feel that I know Elizabeth very well IRL - I spent every morning at her house while her husband and sons were in England so she could go work out - I saw the "real" Elizabeth and her home. I think that knowing her IRL allows me to be more critical of what she puts out there on line - I would definitely be able to tell if she was putting on airs, or acting holier than she really is. Truly, Elizabeth is just like she is on this board and in her blog.
Okay, so this isn't supposed to be the meeting of the "Elizabeth Fan Club", my point is that it seems that there are enough people who have met or spoken with someone else on the board that it would be hard to be anything other than who you are. Just my 2 cents. 
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Cindy - wife to Chris, mommy to my 4 sons!
Kellys Klassroom Korner
St. Anne's Academy
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alicegunther
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| Posted: Jan 03 2007 at 10:47pm | IP Logged
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Cindy Mac wrote:
| Okay, so this isn't supposed to be the meeting of the "Elizabeth Fan Club", |
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Very true, we usually meet on Thursdays.
(Well said, Cindy, btw!)
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Love, Alice
mother of seven!
Cottage Blessings
Brew yourself a cup of tea, and come for a visit!
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Elizabeth
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 6:36am | IP Logged
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alicegunther wrote:
Cindy Mac wrote:
| Okay, so this isn't supposed to be the meeting of the "Elizabeth Fan Club", |
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Very true, we usually meet on Thursdays.
(Well said, Cindy, btw!) |
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Tim,
We need the "Laugh out Loud" icon to roll....
Cindy, thanks for those very kind words. We've been through quite a lot together since that meeting in the cry. It all seemed pretty real to me!
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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Natalia
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 7:58am | IP Logged
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Erin wrote:
| Natalia,I know who you are, you are known |
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Thanks Erin. I guess what I meant is that I don't think that I am known for whom I really am not because people's fault but because I haven't (or can't) presented myself well. I know that posts give a sense of whom we are and we do store information about each other.
Natalia
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Natalia
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alicegunther wrote:
Oh, Natalia, I am probably the worst offender when it comes to name dropping and mentioning personal associations! It is one of those things I do without thinking! Please do not feel at all left out because of it! Why, just this afternoon, I was telling Lissa on the phone . . . .
Totally kidding with that last line, but the rest is sincere! (My theory is that a little unexpected humor is the quickest means to an intimate friendship! ) |
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LOL! Alice. Don't feel bad. It is not a big deal. I know that it is not done in malice. But you know? I am glad I spoke up. It feels good to have that off my mind. I have been feeling the need to say something for a while but I was afraid to offend. Now I can put those feelings behind me and move on. Speaking up is a great thing!
And don't think that is all y'all's fault. I have not shared of myself as much as I should if I want friendships. Friendships come,I think, from disclosure and the willigness to take a risk. I haven't done either.
Another observation: I have noticed that the people that feel a part are the ones that don't mind sharing their struggles and worries in the prayer forum. Praying for one another is a great way to start friendships.
Natalia
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Cay Gibson
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 8:20am | IP Logged
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Natalia wrote:
I have not shared of myself as much as I should if I want friendships.
Natalia |
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Can I just say that Natalia did open her home to my family when we were evacuated for Hurricane Rita in 2005. She was one of those lovely souls who wrote me and offered shelter at her inn. Only I didn't get her invitation until a month later after the storm. We were planning to weather the storm until that very morning and we hastily got out of Dodge at the last minute. I missed her email.
I'm still planning that trip up your way, natalia. One day. I do want to see those atriums and meet you!
Isn't it weird how people can live in the same state and not "see" each other!!!!
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Cay Gibson
"There are 49 states, then there is Louisiana." ~ Chef Emeril
wife to Mark '86
mom to 5
Cajun Cottage Under the Oaks
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alicegunther
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Cay Gibson wrote:
| Can I just say that Natalia did open her home to my family when we were evacuated for Hurricane Rita in 2005. She was one of those lovely souls who wrote me and offered shelter at her inn. Only I didn't get her invitation until a month later after the storm. We were planning to weather the storm until that very morning and we hastily got out of Dodge at the last minute. I missed her email. |
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Oh my goodness, Natalia, I love you already. What a beautiful gesture!
And how right you are about friendships formed through prayer. It is so beautiful to have this community of praying friends.
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Love, Alice
mother of seven!
Cottage Blessings
Brew yourself a cup of tea, and come for a visit!
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Dawn
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 9:12am | IP Logged
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I've been trying to formulate a post for this thread and I fall short each time I try. I do want to say though, that you ladies are a *real* treasure to me.
I was blessed to have a phone conversation with Elizabeth last week (who I fear got an earful of my boys as we spoke. Even though I prepped them beforehand - "Now listen, I'm making a phone call. Please be quiet and watch this nice video while I talk. ). She was as gracious as I could have imagined. This was only the second "4Real" phone call I've had (Hi Rebecca! ) as I too have trouble with phone calls. I don't think I hear that well, and honestly have wondered if I might have an auditory processing disorder. I don't always catch things right away. I do so much better with the written word and face-to-face situations.
Anyhoo, one thing I said to her, as we mused over the "reality" of online friendships was that I love that I have constant contact with you all everyday. I have wonderful IRL friends, but days (even weeks) can go by without a word. I love it that we check in here with each other each and every day. I enjoy my blog, but I come here first each morning. If I have a worry or a need, I *know* I can post here and within minutes hear from caring, helpful women with advice, answers and prayers.
I am so blessed to be a part of this place, this wonderful circle of friends. 
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Dawn, mum to 3 boys 
By Sun and Candlelight
The Nature Corner
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Lissa
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 9:21am | IP Logged
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Natalia wrote:
Another observation: I have noticed that the people that feel a part are the ones that don't mind sharing their struggles and worries in the prayer forum. Praying for one another is a great way to start friendships. |
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Oh my goodness! That is an excellent point! I just remembered that what really gave me that sense of *connection* to the CCM ladies was maintaining the prayer list there. I volunteered to get one going, I remember, in part because I wanted some way to give something back to the wonderful women I was getting so much from. And every day when I made notes on new requests for the weekly update, my heart became fuller of love for the group. I wasn't really aware of it at the time, but that's how it happened.
Natalia, I'm glad you brought this up too. None of us wants to make anyone feel like a second-stringer.
Hey, maybe we should set up a date for a group live chat or something? I'm still LissaNY on AIM, though I admit I seldom open my iChat because I know it could be a dangerous time-drain!
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Lissa
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marihalojen
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Dawn wrote:
I've been trying to formulate a post for this thread and I fall short each time I try. I do want to say though, that you ladies are a *real* treasure to me.
I am so blessed to be a part of this place, this wonderful circle of friends. |
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Can I just second everything Dawn says? I'll just follow her around the boards chirping Me too! Me too!
No, seriously, this community has made such a difference in my personal life and our homeschool life. Living on a sailboat can be very isolating. Even though we have maintained our home port in Tavernier this past year, in our travels whether a week or a few days long I can still drop in and visit with you lovely ladies. It's almost like a sense of stability in friendship that I treasure here.
The fact that you all are Catholic is whipped cream on my triple fudge sundae! There are very few Catholic Homeschoolers in this area, and none are CMers.
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~Jennifer
Mother to Mariannna, age 13
The Mari Hal-O-Jen
SSR = Sailing, Snorkling, Reading
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Genevieve
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Lissa wrote:
| Hey, maybe we should set up a date for a group live chat or something? I'm still LissaNY on AIM, though I admit I seldom open my iChat because I know it could be a dangerous time-drain! |
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I use my iChat all the time with my folks in Singapore. It would be fun to try it out with the 4real group. Do I have to brush my hair?
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Genevieve
The Good Within
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Elizabeth
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 3:15pm | IP Logged
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Kim chimed in here and here.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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teachingmom
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Virginia Bluebells
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| Posted: Jan 04 2007 at 8:37pm | IP Logged
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Natalia wrote:
Another observation: it seems that the people that feel closer all have blogs. Maybe not having a blog is part of why I feel out of the loop a little. The bloggers seem to have formed a community within the community. They read each other's blog and encourage, support and affirm one another in a way that probably makes 4real more real.
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I'm reading this part of the conversation a bit late, but I have to concur with you, Natalia, about this. I love this board. I have a few real life friends who happen to be here too. I feel like I have gotten to know some wonderful women here by reading their posts over the years. I've met a handful of those women in person over the years too, and that helps me feel more connected.
But I've begun to feel a bit like an outsider since blogging has become so popular. I'm not saying anything against blogging or any of you who do it. In fact, when I take the time to read some blogs, I really enjoy it and get some great ideas or encouragement. But maybe we can all be more sensitive about making each member of the 4Real community feel welcome and at home here.
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~Irene (Mom to 6 girls, ages 7-19)
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insegnante
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We actually attend the same Northern VA parish (hint: the saint with the veil) as at least a couple of the regular posters here. Whether or not I encounter people on message boards or in real life, since I don't drive, it seems almost futile to try to get to know busier women than I who cannot always be arranging their schedule around my lack of transportation. Plus I'm on the young (28) and inexperienced (two small boys) side, and I don't feel like mothers of five, six or more are my peers. Though to tell the truth, sometimes I pine for role models more than additional peer-friends right now anyway.
Theresa
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teachingmom
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insegnante wrote:
| We actually attend the same Northern VA parish (hint: the saint with the veil) as at least a couple of the regular posters here. |
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Theresa, If you see the mom with all the girls arriving late to the 10:15 Mass and sitting on the side near the statue of St. Joseph, will you please come introduce yourself? (That is, if we haven't already met, and I just can't place you without a face to go with your name. )
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~Irene (Mom to 6 girls, ages 7-19)
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Martha
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teachingmom wrote:
But I've begun to feel a bit like an outsider since blogging has become so popular. I'm not saying anything against blogging or any of you who do it. In fact, when I take the time to read some blogs, I really enjoy it and get some great ideas or encouragement. But maybe we can all be more sensitive about making each member of the 4Real community feel welcome and at home here. |
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  Could you illustrate precisely how we are to be "sensitive" to this??? I'm not sure why anyone wouldn't feel welcome here just because someone else blogs or discusses blogs? 
There's only a few blog references that are all about blogging. Most are about what is ON the blog, what's going on with the person writing it.
I purposely post here because I don't want to get lost in blogland. I post here and have my blog site in my sig line because I hope YOU will come visit! I'm taking the risk here. I'm putting out this olive branch, a wee itty bit of my life to share with you, via my blog to form a connection and for my personal reflection.
A blog is similiar to a big "Welcome" sign into a small (or large) part of someone else's life and thoughts.
Oh and I wrote about this too! Your Imaginary Friend
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Martha
mama to 7 boys & 4 girls
Yes, they're all ours!
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Lissa
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teachingmom wrote:
Natalia wrote:
Another observation: it seems that the people that feel closer all have blogs. Maybe not having a blog is part of why I feel out of the loop a little. The bloggers seem to have formed a community within the community. They read each other's blog and encourage, support and affirm one another in a way that probably makes 4real more real.
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I'm reading this part of the conversation a bit late, but I have to concur with you, Natalia, about this. I love this board. I have a few real life friends who happen to be here too. I feel like I have gotten to know some wonderful women here by reading their posts over the years. I've met a handful of those women in person over the years too, and that helps me feel more connected.
But I've begun to feel a bit like an outsider since blogging has become so popular. I'm not saying anything against blogging or any of you who do it. In fact, when I take the time to read some blogs, I really enjoy it and get some great ideas or encouragement. But maybe we can all be more sensitive about making each member of the 4Real community feel welcome and at home here. |
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Thanks for speaking up, Irene. I wonder if you would be comfortable elaborating a bit more? With such a wide range of topic threads going here at once, and probably no one managing to keep up with all of them, I would have guessed that the frequent blog-how-to threads didn't make anyone feel left out, any more than the Catholic Mosaic threads or the pregnancy-related threads. (Just grabbing a few random topics for example here, not intending any greater significance!) But I could very well be wrong in that assumption! LOL. Do blog topics feel more clique-ish than other topics?
Or is it the camaraderie among the bloggers spilling over into other topics? I'm asking sincerely, not with any prickliness (wanted to make that clear since you can't "hear" my voice here)--genuinely curious. You, Irene, have been a part of the community here for a very long time, so I find it extremely interesting that you too are feeling a bit elbowed out by the blog stuff, and I'd really like to know what exactly it is that makes you feel that way!
One side thought about the blog community--it isn't necessary to HAVE a blog to be part of it. I have many regular commenters who don't have blogs of their own. I feel like I got to know many wonderful people through my blog (in addition to the people I've met through their own). Not that everyone has the time or inclination to spend a lot of time reading & commenting on blogs--I know this is far from the case! I was just thinking that if anyone is feeling wistful about the blog buddy-buddy stuff, I want them to know the welcome mat is always out, whether you have a blog yourself or not.
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Lissa
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: Are online communities 4real?
