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stefoodie Forum Moderator


Joined: Feb 17 2005 Location: Ohio
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Posted: Oct 13 2006 at 7:06am | IP Logged
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Nancy, this is what we do too. Even we adults take the "cheat sheet" into the confessional, JUST IN CASE. It really gives us all peace of mind and the ability to concentrate on what we are confessing. But of course we still have to make sure the kids understand exactly what they're saying. Helen, that's a great breakdown -- I'll print it out and use it in our next discussion. Thanks!
__________________ stef
mom to five
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hylabrook1 Forum Moderator

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Posted: Oct 13 2006 at 7:58am | IP Logged
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Jenn -
I think what I meant to say was that "I firmly resolve, with the help of thy grace, ..." states that our best intention is not to sin, but we know there is a long way between intention and the fulfillment of that intention. Further, we know we don't have the faintest glimmer of a chance to avoid sin without the merciful gift of God's grace. On the other hand, the simple, direct statement, "I will never sin again", sounds pretty much self-reliant, not recognizing our pitiful weakness against temptation without God's help, and, in sum, is arrogant. I'm sure that is not what was intended by the catechist who suggested this simple form to the children, but when I read it, this was my interpretation. The *more complete thought* in the longer version avoids those problems, IMHO.
As to shorter forms, I really like "Lord Jesus Christ,Son of the living God, have mercy on me, a sinner." Short, simple, to the point, theologically accurate, and very much tied to the ancient traditions of the Church.
Peace,
Nancy
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jackiemomof7 Forum Pro


Joined: Oct 28 2005 Location: Kansas
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Posted: Oct 13 2006 at 8:11am | IP Logged
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Helen,
Our priest used this example for understanding forgiving yet still "feeling the hurt" He said "suppose someone hit your thumb with a hammer or slammed it in a door, you would forgive them but the pain in the thumb is still there." Wow, did that one example really help myself and my children understand that it is an ACT of the WILL to forgive not "feelings". And this also plays into our own spiritual life, one can pray, love and give glory to God but it doesn't mean we will gush with feelings it is our will that we are working on.
And yes I too take a cheat sheet or rather a bookmark with an act of contrition on it. Once I was so rattled by a priest that I couldn't remember it and a made sure from then on to have a copy with me. When I taught CCD I taught the old version instead of the short one in the book. I made lovley cards for the children with it printed on it for them. They all did just fine it was the parents who were upset.
__________________ Jackie wife to Jim for 27!! years, proud army mom of Chris(25),Chef Matthew(24) and Sister Grace of Benedectines (21),Joshua(19),Nicholas(17),Jaymee(15), Elizabeth(13) and 2 in Heaven.Grandma to 3!
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marihalojen Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 12 2006 Location: Florida
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Posted: Oct 13 2006 at 8:27am | IP Logged
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My entire family (Grandma on down through her 8 kids to their kids) all have a copy of the Catholic Book of Prayers and it comes with you to Mass, Confession, Benediction...mine has little ribbon bookmarks that I use to mark the Act of Contrition before going into the Confessional. Grandma always said to read it slowly even though we all had it memorized, as we needed to think carefully on every word, not just rattle it off like it was Grace-Before-Eating.
__________________ ~Jennifer
Mother to Mariannna, age 13
The Mari Hal-O-Jen
SSR = Sailing, Snorkling, Reading
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doris Forum All-Star

Joined: April 24 2006 Location: United Kingdom
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Posted: Oct 13 2006 at 5:44pm | IP Logged
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It was never suggested to me, as a convert, that I learn an act of contrition -- so I just make one up off the cuff. I've always thought this was quite a good idea and meant that I meant it -- but maybe that's some Protestant vestige in me!
I'm inspired to print out the full 'grown-up' one now. (I was once told off for not saying 'the right thing' by a priest and was really offended!)
Elizabeth
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~Rachel~ Forum All-Star


Joined: March 29 2005 Location: Virginia
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Posted: Oct 16 2006 at 2:15pm | IP Logged
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Cay... I feel sorry for your poor old Grandad... what would the priest have said had he only known it in Latin?? Would he have acted differently??
Elizabeth, sometimes I think that people get too hung up on the 'appearance' of the thing. Still... it is nice to use a traditional prayer simply because of all those who have gone before...
__________________ ~Rachel~
Wife to William
Mum to James 13, Lenore 8
Lighting a Fire
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Cici Forum Pro

Joined: March 03 2006 Location: N/A
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Posted: Oct 16 2006 at 2:55pm | IP Logged
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doris wrote:
It was never suggested to me, as a convert, that I learn an act of contrition |
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I can go one step further. It wasn't even suggested to me to really know what a "Act of Contrition" was. Nor to go to confession regularly. Imagine my surprise when I discovered (stumbled upon somewhere) that it was an obligation "minimum" one a year - but more frequently is better!
Cay Gibson wrote:
Talk about watered-down "lapse of contrition". Penances have gotten awfully watered down too, if you know what I mean. |
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Funny you should bring this up. I went to confession a few weeks ago (no line, no one was waiting, still about 1/2 till the time was up) and the pastor pretty much stopped me at number two and gave me a penance. His "Well, okay...go..." was rather weak and left me feeling, well, blah. I left with the impression that it (Confession) isn't really that important, kind of a imposition of his time, really. FWIW, I know its important, but it definitely has made it harder to go back...
I digress/vent. Sorry.
__________________ Christine - mom to
My Sewing Blog
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doris Forum All-Star

Joined: April 24 2006 Location: United Kingdom
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Posted: Oct 16 2006 at 4:28pm | IP Logged
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I left with the impression that it (Confession) isn't really that important, kind of a imposition of his time, really. FWIW, I know its important, but it definitely has made it harder to go back...
I digress/vent. Sorry.[/QUOTE]
[Sorry, haven't quoted before]
Cici, I know EXACTLY what you mean. I used to go to Confession roughly once a month, to our wonderful, wise and insightful university chaplain. I made an appointment to see him in his parlour and then he gave me as long as I needed -- no sense of others waiting outside, him having to hurry off somewhere. Things were soooo different in a parish setting -- some cramped confessional -- actually not even a confessional any more because of worries about false accusations, just an echoing side chapel -- and an uninterested/harrassed priest hurrying through things. I really felt like giving up after one (well meaning but wrong) priest just basically said that I was too hard on myself and should give myself a break! ie I didn't really have anything to confess! Sadly untrue of course.
I suppose we just need to pray about it, and work at finding someone who is on the right wavelength.
Elizabeth
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Dawnie Forum All-Star


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Posted: Oct 16 2006 at 5:53pm | IP Logged
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Okay, here's a dumb question...
Ummm, when are you supposed to say the act of contrition?
[I'm a convert!]
In the parish where I was received into the Church, our priest always prompted me to say it after he had given me absolution. In the parish we go to now, the priest never prompts me...or pauses...so I don't say it in Confession. I usually just say it before I go in, or after as part of my penance.
Thanks!
Dawn
__________________ Mom to Mary Beth (99), Anna (02), Lucia (04), Clara (06), and Adelaide Victoria (2/28/09)
Visit my blog!Water Into Wine:Vino Per Tutto!
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Helen Forum All-Star


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Posted: Oct 21 2006 at 7:33am | IP Logged
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Dawn
If you will answer my "dumb" question - I'll answer yours.
Am I supposed to say "thank you" on a message board after members say something nice about a post that I've made? I feel like hiding. It's not that I'm rude (at least I'm not trying to be.) I just feel awkward.
__________________ Ave Maria!
Mom to 5 girls and 3 boys
Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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jdostalik Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 15 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: Oct 21 2006 at 8:27am | IP Logged
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Dawn,
After I confess my sins, our priests give me my penance and discuss my spiritual needs. Then, they ask me to say my A of C. After I do, they absolve me, we briefly say good bye and I remove myself to the chapel to pray my penance and thank God for his mercy!
__________________ God Bless,
Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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Jenn Sal Forum All-Star


Joined: June 23 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: Oct 24 2006 at 4:22pm | IP Logged
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I get confused with the last line:
To sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin. Amen
or
To do Penance and to amend my life. Amen
I have a 5yo who knows the first way. Is this correct? It's what I taught her, but I also know the other way. When my daughter heard me mention this difference to my usband, she said, "Mommy, I thouhgt prayers couldn't be changed?" What do I say?
__________________ Jennifer, Texas
Wife to Mark, Mom to Cora 13,Kade 10, Sarah in Heaven 12/05, Colette 7, Corin 5, & Kieran 2
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MicheleQ Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Pennsylvania
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Posted: Oct 24 2006 at 4:32pm | IP Logged
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Dawnie wrote:
Okay, here's a dumb question...
Ummm, when are you supposed to say the act of contrition?
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After you have confessed your sins but before absolution is given. If the priest wants to comment or give you counsel then you would generally say the act of contrition after that but again it should be before absolution is given.
__________________ Michele Quigley
wife to my prince charming and mom of 10 in Lancaster County, PA USA
http://michelequigley.com
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MicheleQ Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Pennsylvania
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Posted: Oct 24 2006 at 4:33pm | IP Logged
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Jenn Sal wrote:
I get confused with the last line:
To sin no more and to avoid the near occasion of sin. Amen
or
To do Penance and to amend my life. Amen
I have a 5yo who knows the first way. Is this correct? It's what I taught her, but I also know the other way. When my daughter heard me mention this difference to my usband, she said, "Mommy, I thouhgt prayers couldn't be changed?" What do I say?
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I would say that there are different forms of various prayers and that either way is correct.
God bless,
__________________ Michele Quigley
wife to my prince charming and mom of 10 in Lancaster County, PA USA
http://michelequigley.com
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MicheleQ Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Pennsylvania
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Posted: Oct 24 2006 at 4:40pm | IP Logged
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Serial posting...sorry.
From the Rite of Penance:
PENITENT'S CONFESSION AND ACCEPTANCE OF THE PENANCE
18. Next comes the penitent's confession of sins, beginning with the general confession formulary, I confess to almighty God, if this is the custom. If necessary, the confessor assists the penitent to make a complete confession; he also encourages the penitent to repent sincerely for offenses against God; finally he offers practical advice for beginning a new life, and, where necessary, gives instruction on the duties of the Christian life .
A penitent who has been the cause of harm or scandal to others is to be led by the priest to resolve to make due restitution.
Next, the priest imposes an act of penance or expiation on the penitent; this should serve not only as atonement for past sins but also as an aid to a new life and an antidote for weakness. As far as possible, therefore, the penance should correspond to the seriousness and nature of the sins. This act of penance may suitably take the form of prayer, self-denial, and especially service to neighbor and works of mercy. These will underline the fact that sin and its forgiveness have a social aspect.
PENITENT'S PRAYER AND THE PRIEST'S ABSOLUTION
19. Next, through a prayer for God's pardon the penitent expresses contrition and the resolution to begin a new life. It is advantageous for this prayer to be based on the words of Scripture.
Following the penitent's prayer, the priest extends his hands, or at least his right hand, over the head of the penitent and pronounces the formulary of absolution, in which the essential words are: I ABSOLVE YOU FROM YOUR SINS IN THE NAME OF THE FATHER AND OF THE SON AND OF THE HOLY SPIRIT. As he says the final phrase the priest makes the sign of the cross over the penitent. The form of absolution (see no. 46) indicates that the reconciliation of the penitent comes from the mercy of the Father; it shows the connection between the reconciliation of the sinner and the paschal mystery of Christ; it stresses the role of the Holy Spirit in the forgiveness of sins; finally, it underlines the ecclesial aspect of the sacrament, because reconciliation with God is asked for and given through the ministry of the Church.
God bless,
__________________ Michele Quigley
wife to my prince charming and mom of 10 in Lancaster County, PA USA
http://michelequigley.com
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jdostalik Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 15 2005 Location: Texas
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Posted: Oct 25 2006 at 11:25pm | IP Logged
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MicheleQ wrote:
Dawnie wrote:
Okay, here's a dumb question...
Ummm, when are you supposed to say the act of contrition?
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After you have confessed your sins but before absolution is given. If the priest wants to comment or give you counsel then you would generally say the act of contrition after that but again it should be before absolution is given. |
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Michele,
Your pregnant brain is obviously still working well, mine is not! I apologize for my previous post where I was switching the order, after my confession,our priests do give advice, etc., then ask for my A of C, which I say and then they absolve me. You are correct, the act of contrition should be said before absolution...time to go to bed for me...
__________________ God Bless,
Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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Angie Mc Board Moderator


Joined: Jan 31 2005 Location: Arizona
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Posted: Oct 26 2006 at 11:35am | IP Logged
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Dawnie wrote:
In the parish where I was received into the Church, our priest always prompted me to say it after he had given me absolution. In the parish we go to now, the priest never prompts me...or pauses...so I don't say it in Confession. I usually just say it before I go in, or after as part of my penance.
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You aren't the only one confused, Dawn. In several parishes I've attended for Confession in both PA and AZ, priests have asked that the Act of Contrition be said outside the confessional...to save time ?
Helen wrote:
Dawn
If you will answer my "dumb" question - I'll answer yours.
Am I supposed to say "thank you" on a message board after members say something nice about a post that I've made? I feel like hiding. It's not that I'm rude (at least I'm not trying to be.) I just feel awkward. |
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Helen, I'm thinking that if you said "You are welcome!" for every "thank you" you receive, your computer time would double . Over the years with this group, I've noticed that for the most part, "you're welcomes" are assumed so no one is assumed rude for not posting it formally. Sometimes I will PM "you are welcome" or sometimes I will include it with a follow-up post that has additional thoughts on the thread.
No more hiding now, hear?
__________________ Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
About Me
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MicheleQ Forum All-Star


Joined: Feb 23 2005 Location: Pennsylvania
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Posted: Oct 26 2006 at 8:11pm | IP Logged
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Angie Mc wrote:
Dawnie wrote:
In the parish where I was received into the Church, our priest always prompted me to say it after he had given me absolution. In the parish we go to now, the priest never prompts me...or pauses...so I don't say it in Confession. I usually just say it before I go in, or after as part of my penance.
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You aren't the only one confused, Dawn. In several parishes I've attended for Confession in both PA and AZ, priests have asked that the Act of Contrition be said outside the confessional...to save time ? |
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Yes I've seen that done here as well, especially at penance services but then in the confessional some priests will ask for an act of contrition anyway. And even if they don't I always say it.
__________________ Michele Quigley
wife to my prince charming and mom of 10 in Lancaster County, PA USA
http://michelequigley.com
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Helen Forum All-Star


Joined: Dec 03 2005
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Posted: Oct 26 2006 at 8:17pm | IP Logged
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Angie Mc wrote:
Over the years with this group, I've noticed that for the most part, "you're welcomes" are assumed so no one is assumed rude for not posting it formally. Sometimes I will PM "you are welcome" or sometimes I will include it with a follow-up post that has additional thoughts on the thread. |
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Thank you, good to know.
Angie Mc wrote:
No more hiding now, hear?  |
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Well, if I felt like hiding before this last post, you'll have to believe I nearly got out my shovel to dig a hole in the backyard to hide in after that one!
__________________ Ave Maria!
Mom to 5 girls and 3 boys
Mary Vitamin & Castle of the Immaculate
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Cici Forum Pro

Joined: March 03 2006 Location: N/A
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Posted: Oct 26 2006 at 9:51pm | IP Logged
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So, if the priest doesn't do it in the "right order" - excuse my ignorance - then what?
I was absolved. Then I asked if this is where I said my Act of Contrition. He said I could say it if I wanted to (huh?). Or, "just something I wanted to say to express my sorrow".
I may be taking this somewhat off topic, but, part of the beauty of the Catholic church (for me when I converted) was its stability. Its order. Hmnnn...this isn't the first odd thing about this parish. And the troubling part is, for converts - like myself - it takes longer to figure out these "differences" - do they matter?
Looks like we're moving to southern OH soon, so we'll have to switch parishes...but still...
__________________ Christine - mom to
My Sewing Blog
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