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Pilgrim
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| Posted: Aug 03 2011 at 8:31am | IP Logged
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It's so true to be prepared for things to not go as you planned, especially with twins. It is very good to plan, it helps to have in mind what you would like to do. I found the first three months were the hardest months after the twins. We had to be very open to change of plans. I have never used formula, even for supplementing, always had plenty of milk, but in the first month or two months (can't remember, we ended up having to give them a little formula at the end of the feeding, if they just weren't getting any more milk, and were still hungry. Especially ds needed more supplementing, not very often, usually at night, right before bed. That was a very hard descision for me to make, but I had to for the health of the babies.
One thing I found very helpful was a chart I kept in a binder by me. I wrote down the time they nursed and which side, etc, and also any meds they had to have at all. For example dd had some yeast problems in her neck creases because she spit up SO much. So when I put her cream on her neck, I wrote it down in that hour's slot, then I didn't put it on too often, or forget it.  The chart was especially helpful in the first weeks when we HAD to make sure they were eating every two hours. The chart also helped because I wrote down their diaper fillings of both kinds. That really helped in keeping track of whether they were getting enough feeding in those early days.
I found I couldn't tandem nurse for a little while, it was too hard to keep 2 little newborns latched on right at the same time. But, don't give up hope if you find it to be the same for you, eventually we got it down pat when they could latch on better and weren't quite so floppy. 
Be prepared for less sleep then you've ever experienced for the first 2-3 months. It's inevitable, trying to nurse 2 babies through the night, especially if they're "sleepy babies" like ours were. We would finally get them awake and fed, and then we'd get half an hour of sleep, then it was time to wake up again and feed them. We had to make sure they ate every 2 hours, at least for the first 2 months I think it was.
Like Kim said, not trying to scare you or be negative at all. It was/is a great experience having twins. But, we are beings who need sleep, etc, especially after such a grueling pregnancy, and it can get difficult to bear in those first post-partum days. Sometimes I find it helps to know to some degree what you are facing, it helps to know, "this is normal, I WILL get through this".
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Chris V
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| Posted: Aug 03 2011 at 9:23am | IP Logged
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Pilgrim wrote:
| We had to be very open to change of plans. I have never used formula, even for supplementing, always had plenty of milk, but in the first month or two months (can't remember, we ended up having to give them a little formula at the end of the feeding, if they just weren't getting any more milk, and were still hungry. Especially ds needed more supplementing, not very often, usually at night, right before bed. That was a very hard descision for me to make, but I had to for the health of the babies. |
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This really resonates with me Pilgrim. I exclusively breastfed my three girls until they all self-weaned, and they were each about two years old when they stopped (plus or minus a month or two). The three of them have never had a bottle. Ever. Not even a bottle filled with my breastmilk, and surely not a bottle filled with formula. However, I've already "talked" to myself about this ... I know that this might not be the case with my twins when they are born, and I am trying to emotionally prepare myself for the fact that I may need to supplement with formula ... if I can be ok with it now, then I won't have as hard of a time accepting it when (and or) if it becomes a reality. (I know that using formula, for some, isn't a big deal, so they may not understand my hesitation or my passion for exclusively nursing, but it is very important to me ... so letting go and being open is difficult).
Pilgrim wrote:
One thing I found very helpful was a chart I kept in a binder by me. I wrote down the time they nursed and which side, etc, and also any meds they had to have at all. |
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This is a fantastic idea. I will remember this.
Pilgrim wrote:
The chart was especially helpful in the first weeks when we HAD to make sure they were eating every two hours. The chart also helped because I wrote down their diaper fillings of both kinds. That really helped in keeping track of whether they were getting enough feeding in those early days. |
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I have always set an alarm clock for every two hours throughout the night (for the first three months or so) to wake and feed my babies. I so clearly remember that by the they were done eating, had a diaper change, and I had just fallen back to sleep, it would be time to feed them again  ... funny NOW, not so much back then when you are feeling the extreme fatigue of exhaustion
Pilgrim wrote:
Like Kim said, not trying to scare you or be negative at all. It was/is a great experience having twins. But, we are beings who need sleep, etc, especially after such a grueling pregnancy, and it can get difficult to bear in those first post-partum days. Sometimes I find it helps to know to some degree what you are facing, it helps to know, "this is normal, I WILL get through this". |
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It's a good thing I've got nothing to prove  and I know how to accept help without feeling as though I have failed on some level.
I can remember after my second was born I was having a very difficult time (seems to silly now, but that was my reality then); my mother came to stay with me ... my Dad drove her all the way across the state, he stayed for a couple of days himself, then kissed her and said, just give me a call when you're ready to come home. And she said "that's not up to me, that's up to Christy" ... (my parents call me Christy). After two weeks or so I could sense that she was ready to sleep in her own bed and be back in her own home. One morning she came downstairs, I was nursing my little one, and she said "how ya doing? are you feeling good?" .. and I burst into tears and said "you can't leave me!!!!" . She didn't. She stayed until I said, go home . My MIL is the same way - incredibly selfless and willing to help under any circumstance.
I may not have relatives that live within 100 miles, but I have two mothers that will drop whatever they have planned to come and help me, even if it means driving 6 hours just to get to me. And I have some incredible friends ... I mean it, I have some of the most incredible girlfriends that anyone has ever had, they are the kind that show up at your home with a hot meal and spend the day cleaning your kitchen, all without being asked to do so. 
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Pilgrim
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| Posted: Aug 03 2011 at 12:03pm | IP Logged
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Chris V wrote:
I can remember after my second was born I was having a very difficult time (seems to silly now, but that was my reality then); my mother came to stay with me ... my Dad drove her all the way across the state, he stayed for a couple of days himself, then kissed her and said, just give me a call when you're ready to come home. And she said "that's not up to me, that's up to Christy" ... (my parents call me Christy). After two weeks or so I could sense that she was ready to sleep in her own bed and be back in her own home. One morning she came downstairs, I was nursing my little one, and she said "how ya doing? are you feeling good?" .. and I burst into tears and said "you can't leave me!!!!" . She didn't. She stayed until I said, go home . My MIL is the same way - incredibly selfless and willing to help under any circumstance.
I may not have relatives that live within 100 miles, but I have two mothers that will drop whatever they have planned to come and help me, even if it means driving 6 hours just to get to me. And I have some incredible friends ... I mean it, I have some of the most incredible girlfriends that anyone has ever had, they are the kind that show up at your home with a hot meal and spend the day cleaning your kitchen, all without being asked to do so. |
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Chris, that is so great!! My family has been incredibly helpful in the last two pregnancies/birth/postpartum days, coming and staying for weeks at a time. One teenage brother even stayed for 2 months himself, and a total of 3 months including the time the rest of them came. Isn't generous family help so invaluable?!? I'm so glad you have help like that!
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Pilgrim
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| Posted: Aug 03 2011 at 12:07pm | IP Logged
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Chris V wrote:
This really resonates with me Pilgrim. I exclusively breastfed my three girls until they all self-weaned, and they were each about two years old when they stopped (plus or minus a month or two). The three of them have never had a bottle. Ever. Not even a bottle filled with my breastmilk, and surely not a bottle filled with formula. However, I've already "talked" to myself about this ... I know that this might not be the case with my twins when they are born, and I am trying to emotionally prepare myself for the fact that I may need to supplement with formula ... if I can be ok with it now, then I won't have as hard of a time accepting it when (and or) if it becomes a reality. (I know that using formula, for some, isn't a big deal, so they may not understand my hesitation or my passion for exclusively nursing, but it is very important to me ... so letting go and being open is difficult).
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I can so understand this! I felt the same way. I cried to myself at having to give them formula, but when it helped them gain the weight they needed, I resigned myself to it. The exclusive nursing was so important to me, as well. Letting go and being open WAS difficult, but now I look back with such peace that it was the right choice for them. And now I can rejoice in exclusively nursing this Little One!
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Aug 03 2011 at 12:35pm | IP Logged
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I realize this may not be possible with twins.. but most babies still thrive with a 3-4 hr space between nursing at night. (note I'm not saying to do that if the baby can't but..) And that one longer span of sleep makes a HUGE HUGE difference to how mom feels. Might even make a difference in how well your body can produce milk just because you're getting enough rest that more resources can go toward that.
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Angi
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My twins were in a Kozy carrier together when they were tiny (maybe a pic on facebook) and one in the Kozy on front and one in an Ergo on back when older. I did love my double stroller, so they were not always worn ;). Anastasia was exclusively breastfed and weaned at 29 months, Cecilia had bottles of expressed breast milk for 6 weeks due to a birth defect and weaned at 29 months. Due to oversupply, I assigned each twin a breast, they always nursed from that side, it made it easier for me to see/feel who needed to eat. Lol
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: babywearing twins
