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Susana
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| Posted: March 23 2011 at 9:07pm | IP Logged
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marianhome wrote:
| I got a UTI and since then for three years I have been unable to carry a child. |
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Raquel, at the risk of sounding dumb here, what is a UTI?
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Mami to ds12,ds11,ds10,ds8,dd7, dd4, and ds 2.
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Elena
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| Posted: March 23 2011 at 9:17pm | IP Logged
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Urinary tract infection
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Elena
Wife to Peter, mom of many!
My Domestic Church
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marianhome
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| Posted: March 23 2011 at 9:20pm | IP Logged
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yes, thanks Elena. Sorry, I should had written it without abbreviation! 
raquel
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Raquel&David, Maria 8, Rebecca 6, Samuel 4, and early pregnancy babies in heaven.
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lisat.momof6
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| Posted: March 24 2011 at 5:53am | IP Logged
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Well, I'm trying very hard to be all natural in all areas. I have big babies and my OB induces me early everytime. I have mever gone into labor on my own. The pitocin is so strong that I can't manage the pain, I can NOT stand to be laying down strapped to thar bed. I get highly agitated. Not good memories. I never had any complications during labor, all 6 babies were healthy. I just hate all of the interventions. I do feel cheated out of the JOY of delivering my precious babies. I did watch The Business of Being Born. Besides from all of the profanity, it was awesome! It was what got me turned on to homebirths. Homebirths are legal here and there is a midwife in the erea. I even spoke with her, she sounded awesome! The hospital is a little less than 15 mins away. So, it is definitely doable. It just make sense to have a homebirth. I don't run to the doc when my kids are sick, I run to my mil's herb cabinet. I don't vax. I use no paper or disposable products, none! I really wish I lived 100+ years ago. Hospital waste so much, it's unthinkable!!! I really wanted to know about how you manange your other children during the birth? How is it with out the 2day break? stuff like that. Ok, gotta go, kids are waking up.
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mathmama
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| Posted: March 24 2011 at 6:14am | IP Logged
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After having 2 less than ideal hospital births (both inductions for no real reason) we chose homebirth for our third. My water broke sometime very early on 10/19 (it was leaking when I got up before 6AM) and I didn't start labor until about 1:30PM on 10/20. My MW had a plan if labor didn't start by about 3PM, but praise be to God that it did. It was my easiest labor hands down. Veronica was born at 6:45PM, so labor was short once it started. I really appreciated the patience the MW showed. That would have never happened in the hospital.
We were a bit on the fence about homebirth but the thing that really put us over the edge was the fact that we didn't feel comfortable leaving our middle child with anyone while I was in labor. She has multiple and severe food allergies. Actually, there was one person I would have been comfortable leaving her with, but she was also my birth support, so that wouldn't work.
As for the logistics at home, the dd of my birth support is loved by my girls so she came to watch them while I was in labor. It worked out beautifully. The girls paid me no attention because it was so special having Leah here playing with them. As for the recovery, well, if I can do it anyone can. My husband is unable to take any time off of work except for the labor and delivery. I had Veronica at 6:45PM on 10/20 and DH was back in class the next morning (I think even for an 8AM class). I asked Veronica's Godmother to come over and help me out that day. She did and it was wonderful! So much nicer than being in the hospital. Dh didn't teach the following day so he was home and then the day after that I was on my own. I simply had the older girls bring down their pillows and I spread a quilt on the floor and we watched movies all day. I decided to call that day a success if everyone got to eat lunch  Well, it was a remarkable success because not only did we all eat, but I cleaned up the kitchen as well!
You will be surprised at how quickly your body recovers when it is not pumped full of junk from an induction. My hospital induction births were hard on me. I needed help getting out of bed to use the bathroom and had trouble using the bathroom. I was sore, very sore for a week at least. The night of my homebirth I was alone in the guest room sleeping with the baby and had to get myself out of bed several times to use the bathroom...no problem! The next morning besides the afterpains, the only issue I had were some sore stomach muscles. And no swelling! The only time I would swell in pregnancy was after they pumped full of all the stuff in the hospital. No swelling at all this time. It was so nice!
Ok, I have written alot  But, your concerns echoed mine before my homebirth and your hospital experiences were also similar to mine.
Pray about it, God will show you what is best for you and your family 
Beth
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Beth, wife to Tom and mommy to 4 beautiful girls:
Therese 11/04
Anna Mary 6/07
Veronica 10/09
Theodora 11/12
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Angie Mc
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| Posted: March 24 2011 at 1:52pm | IP Logged
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Here is a thorough list of questions to ask a midwife, to check her philosophy, personality, and professionalism.
I try to avoid cavalier or naive thinking on the part of my midwife and myself. It can be hard. On one hand I hold the midwife highly responsible for her expertise. I must trust her, her skill, and her decision-making. On the other hand, I'm ultimately responsible to make the best decision I can, *at the time I make it*. Hindsight can be applied to future decisions. I want my intuition, past experience, need for privacy, and other subjective matters to count as important. I also need to be brutally honest and objective. One criteria I have for choosing a midwife is her candor; how quick is she to test me on my physical, emotional, and mental strength and to give me honest feedback on my weaknesses? Another criteria is her humility; how quick is she to set her own healthy boundaries and limits?
Thank you to all the moms who have shared their encouragement to discern well, especially those who have faced birthing difficulties.
Praying for you, lisat 
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: March 24 2011 at 2:16pm | IP Logged
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One of the things that is hard for me is that I want to "condemn" a lot of invasive practices.. BUT BUT BUT I really need to remember that those practices were developed to help someone who needed that type of help. They're only "wrong" when applied to women who don't need that particular intervention.
Just because women can birth big babies (I've done so myself) doesn't mean that all women can.
Now I think the incident of those that truly can not, is lower than done in practice. But that still doesn't mean that YOU are the one that can forego the intervention. Maybe you are. But maybe you're not. So you'll want to be sure to research the reasons. Find out why your OB thought you couldn't birth a larger baby.. is there something different about your pelvic girdle? the shaper of your uterus? whatever might be the reasoning and really research it.. don't just assume that because it's often an unnecessary intervention that it always is.
I really enjoyed Henci Goer's books Because she does address risk and when interventions are good and when they're not. I'm not sure exactly how the book I linked to is. I had her book Obstetric Myths vs Research Realities but it's really expensive now. And I've heard good things about the Thinking Woman's Guide to a Better Birth which is still reasonably priced.
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knowloveserve
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| Posted: March 24 2011 at 2:38pm | IP Logged
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Regarding the care of children at home.
My daughter was born about 2 am and my three boys were sleeping blissfully in their room... they were none the wiser. And the glory of getting to wake up to a new baby in the house was better than Christmas for them!
This is one advantage. You don't have to call someone in the middle of the night to watch your kids.
If it's a day labor, you can have a friend take the kids for a while... that's my plan this time around. (But all my babies have been night babies.)
Recovery. Ideally you'll have a relative or friend who can come over and help out. My husband is able to manage the household some, but it was a tremendous help that my friend came and stayed with us a few days and cooked and cleaned. I just hid in my bedroom with the baby most the day long for about a week straight.
It totally beat the hospital "recovery"... being woken up to take your pain pills, listening to the beeps and buttons and nurse chatter, not having the comfort of your own bed and own bathroom.
I was shocked at how much better my physical recovery was after a homebirth.
But the best part of all is not having to strap a tiny, frail 2 day old baby in a carseat to take home.
The midwife came a couple days after the birth do the PKU prick and checkup. I didn't have to go into the hospital until she was 2 weeks old (and only then because of a scare)... if you don't do well baby checkups, you get to avoid a lot of the hassle.
Homebirthing is amazing... a very spiritual experience. I didn't know what I was missing until I had one.
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Lisbet
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| Posted: March 24 2011 at 3:42pm | IP Logged
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More often than not most of my children sleep through labor and wake up to a new sibling! :) Sometimes, the younger ones think they are dreaming! LOL! My oldest daughter has been present for 3 of her siblings births now. My next daughter was present for the youngest birth 5 months ago.
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herdingkittens
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| Posted: March 25 2011 at 6:14pm | IP Logged
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knowloveserve wrote:
It totally beat the hospital "recovery"... being woken up to take your pain pills, listening to the beeps and buttons and nurse chatter, not having the comfort of your own bed and own bathroom.
I was shocked at how much better my physical recovery was after a homebirth.
But the best part of all is not having to strap a tiny, frail 2 day old baby in a carseat to take home.
The midwife came a couple days after the birth do the PKU prick and checkup. I didn't have to go into the hospital until she was 2 weeks old (and only then because of a scare)... if you don't do well baby checkups, you get to avoid a lot of the hassle.
Homebirthing is amazing... a very spiritual experience. I didn't know what I was missing until I had one. |
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So so so agree with you on these points (and the plug for Ina May's book!)!!
We had our first HB with our 6th (born last month) and it was AWESOME! All of our others were midife hospital births, natural, no complications, except for our twins which i had normally but was told to have an epidural (which I did not want - LONG story  ). After the pressures of interventions with our twins, doing a LOT of reading, and a LOT of praying, one month before having our son, we switched to a different MW (a friend of mine) who offered to deliver our son at home. I was anxious about going to the hospital and having to again put up a fight for so many things - I just wanted to have our baby and relax....
One of the most beautiful things that came out of having him at home was after he was born at 7pm, me, our new baby and our 3 year old twins cuddled up and the twins fell asleep stroking and kissing him. No kidding. It was a beautiful and natural transition.
Also, my 8 year old daughter wanted to be there for the birth and she assisted the whole 4 hours. My MW taught her how to knit during my labor in the tub and she was able to see him born. He is HER baby, and she now wants to be a midwife. Amazing.
So much more I could say, but I will never go back, unless I have to.
Prayers for your decision!
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Susana
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| Posted: March 25 2011 at 7:47pm | IP Logged
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knowloveserve wrote:
He is HER baby, and she now wants to be a midwife. Amazing.
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 Awww, how sweet! The morning my little Maya Maria was born (the kids slept through it all), my second oldest walked in to our bedroom to go to the bathroom and heard the baby making sounds. He was like "huh? what's that? Do you hear that?" My husband and I couldn't help but laugh and be filled with joy at telling him his baby sister had finally arrived! :)
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Mrs. B
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| Posted: March 29 2011 at 8:22am | IP Logged
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Heart and Hands is a good book to study and have on hand if you are thinking of a home birth.
All of our 4 children have been born at home. I love homebirth and I love not having to go to a hospital. My recoveries have been pretty good, but I try to hold to the baby moon idea and not do a lot out of the house for a few weeks after I have a baby.
It's really important to pray though for a good birth. I love to pray to the Blessed Mother under the title of our Lady of LeLeche when I am pregnant. Prayer helps me feel a part of something greater, rather than being on my own and suffering through a pregnancy.
Doctors and midwives can both make mistakes, there are always risks associated with giving birth. You can't get away from all risk, but home birth can prevent the escalation of interventions that will sometimes lead to problems. I believe that many women would be able to safely give birth at home, but I also think that there are always going to be women who will want to birth at a hospital. If it's where you are most comfortable, or where you feel secure than that may be best for you.
I also think that mom and baby are partners in the birth. It isn't all about mom nor is it only about baby, but it's really about the family and welcoming another blessing in it. Home seems more natural to me for that reason.
Always be prepared for a change of plans, and don't be so attached to a specific ideal. I remember I wanted a water birth for the first one. ha, ha, ha...worst thing I ever did! despite being firmly convinced before hand of all the benefits, it turned into a bad experience and I never wanted to try it again. It's hard to tell before hand what will help, so have different ideas, make sure the birth team, or your hubby knows about them and then be flexible in trying things out.
I hope things go well with your birth.
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NMMountainMom
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| Posted: April 07 2011 at 2:48pm | IP Logged
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4 lads mom wrote:
I am tip toeing in here.....but I feel it is important to hear the other side of homebirth.....I almost lost my sweet Pete at his homebirth. It is very painful to talk about. The bottom line is, while I had a midwife with a terrific pedigree, she was an RN, taught at a big Ivy League school.....etc etc....she was overly confident, and took me on to prove to all that I could indeed have a terrific birth after many difficult OB experiences that, as far as she could see, were all because of poor OB care. She ignored some big warning signs...and then took waaaay too lightly my signs of labor, (duh, this was my fifth birth!) and my poor husband and I gave birth to a baby who was lifeless, blue and not breathing. I tried to resuscitate my baby, until the midwife ran in a few minutes later and did, after a very scary few minutes, get him breathing. It was then that we discovered that he had a syndrome that included a jaw that didn’t support his tongue and obstructed his breathing, and also a very large cleft palate. My husband and I could barely talk about this for years without having physical symptoms of PTSD.
The take a way is.....things can go wrong no matter where you are.....but I wished we had been in a hospital. I can’t tell you that I am against homebirth....but after a previous baby (before Pete) had died at 18 weeks, and had some kind of genetic issues, and baby number three (before the loss) had seen genetics, and they were thinking he had some kind of syndrome.....I should never have been a candidate for a homebirth...and my midwife’s ego so got in the way, as well as my desire for a good birth....that our judgement was clouded in a big way. She totally ignored my concerns over Pete’s ultrasound, where I SAW how tiny his jaw was.....the radiologist and her both missed this.
I pray for peace, clarity, and wisdom in your decision.....and I hope others can understand I felt I had to share my experience because the reality is, not all homebirths are okay.
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I think your experience emphasizes the importance of listening to your "gut". I had two hospital births and then two homebirths. I prayed about my home births and was at peace with the decision both times. But then the fifth came around and I didn't have any peace about birthing at home. I really wanted to, but there were some circumstances that had changed. I couldn't put my finger on why, but it did not feel right. I ended up having ds5 at a birth center across the street from a hospital. He was born not breathing and the midwives and paramedics had to do cpr on him until he was at the hospital. From there he was life flighted to a regional hospital where he spent several days in the NICU. Praise God, he completely recovered, but it would have been a disaster had he been born at home.
I will forever cherish the home births of two of my babies. I fully support home birth. But listen to that still small voice. I don't care who your provider is... ob or midwife. If something seems off, listen to that voice!
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Homebirth?
