Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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SusanJ
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Posted: July 27 2009 at 1:27pm | IP Logged Quote SusanJ

I appreciate Elizabeth's thoughts on this and I'm glad to see that feeling judged hasn't been a problem for too many of the people who spoke up. Feeling judged, and acting judgmental myself, was the main impetus behind the thread in the first place. I think part of me wanted to cleanse my conscience by declaring somewhat publicly, "I buy expensive shoes! Even when money is tight! And I don't feel bad about it!" But all the time I was judging my mom and stepdad for spending exorbitant amounts of money (in my view) on lots of television entertainment (and many other things I would never buy) when they are on the verge of losing their house. This conflict finally occurred to me and I thought it would be enlightening to pose these questions to a group whose values are more similar to mine.

It has been helpful and fun to see everyone's responses. I'm sure most of us could have had a list for each answer. There were many answers to number four where I thought, "I would never spend money on THAT." But I certainly didn't judge anyone personally for their choices.

I didn't ask anyone to explain their answers because I am, personally, tired of defending myself or explaining myself. We have family who assume we are REALLY poor because we don't have a television. And we have family who would assume we were REALLY wealthy if they knew how much my summer sandals cost (I got them on sale for $59).

Oh, and though I stand by my answer to never paying for cable television I do indulge in it when we are visiting family :) Cable sports are a pretty big deal to most of the people we love. No harm meant and I do apologize if any lurkers on this thread felt judged. I was hoping for a lot of variety so I hope no one refrained from participating because of what their answers would be.

Susan

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Angie Mc
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Posted: July 27 2009 at 2:17pm | IP Logged Quote Angie Mc

This is a super fun topic, Susan. Thanks for starting it . Although I don't need to give an explanation, it did occur to me that my answers would have been *much* different at the early stages of my mothering and now. For example, after my sons became involved and very interested in sports, our family went from living rural remote without t.v. to have Direct TV with Tivo - love it! Another example, after miscarrying Catherine and waiting to become pregnant again, but each month being disappointed, I started to treat myself to a good beer, after not having had an alcoholic drink since before I had children! Another...when I was going through an especially hard time personally, about 1.5 years ago, my dh started bringing me fancy dancy chocolates as gifts. In the past I would have scoffed at such an extravagence (shame on me!) In retrospect, some of my sacrifices were life-giving and helped me to grow in discipline *but* some of my sacrifices were needless and I was just being bull-headed to not let a little sunshine in. Oh, and as I age, my personal care products are going through the roof! Never in a million years did I think I would spend such money on shoes, hair and skin care, make-up, vitamins, etc - YIKES. How's that for not explaining myself ?

Here's goes to the OP:

1. What is one thing you spend money on that many consider a luxury but you don't?

Ameribag Purse - always purchased on sale.

2. What is one thing you splurge on even though you consider it a luxury?

Direct TV with Tivo!

3. What is one luxury you would never pay for even if money were no object?

A bigger home in a nicer part of town....could of...didn't...like my cozy home and modest neighborhood.

4. What is the first luxury you would acquire if money were no object (or the first one you can think of anyway!).

Ooooooooo, the ol' "what would you do if you won the lottery?" day dream...I would *love* to establish a financial endowment with the interest going to independent Catholic charities, especially those that serve children in need. That and...

A modest cottage on Coronado Beach, California!

ETA: updated cottage link - the first was in FL

Love,

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mellyrose
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Posted: July 27 2009 at 6:02pm | IP Logged Quote mellyrose

1. What is one thing you spend money on that many consider a luxury but you don't?

bottled water. DH got sick when Milwaukee's water was contaminated in the early 90's and won't drink tap water.

2. What is one thing you splurge on even though you consider it a luxury?

Electronics (iPod, iPhone, DS, Wii, etc.) Also high-speed internet

3. What is one luxury you would never pay for even if money were no object?

A private yacht

4. What is the first luxury you would acquire if money were no object (or the first one you can think of anyway!).

A big, rambling beach house along the coast somewhere

** The mention of the sensitivity issue struck me and is why I waited to respond. For me -- I was able to skim over the cable responses (I love my dvr and satellite dish & don't feel guilty) but the comments about daycare stung (probably because I'm still trying to find a good fit, and it's a fairly new situation for my family) I think we're all sensitive to different things at different times . . .

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Mary Chris
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Posted: July 29 2009 at 4:51pm | IP Logged Quote Mary Chris

Angie Mc wrote:

4. What is the first luxury you would acquire if money were no object (or the first one you can think of anyway!).

Ooooooooo, the ol' "what would you do if you won the lottery?" day dream...I would *love* to establish a financial endowment with the interest going to independent Catholic charities, especially those that serve children in need. That and...

A modest cottage on Coronado Beach, California!

ETA: updated cottage link - the first was in FL

Love,


I also day dream about what sort of financial endowment I would start....how to make sure everyone bre*stfeeds their baby, cure cancer ....world peace........

And I'd be doing all that right around the corner from you Angie in a modest cottage right around the corner from you. (I can't make the link work ) Just imagine the walks we could have on the beach, we would solve all the worlds problems while picking up sand dollars.

I'll come back later with answers to the other questions.

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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 10:15am | IP Logged Quote Stephanie_Q

The new shoe thread got me thinking about something that I always considered a luxury that I've finally decided to 'splurge' on. New clothes - I usually shop the clearance racks, consignment, and thrift stores when I desperately need something, but I just bought some TALL maternity pants that actually fit. (I did find one pair on clearance for $17.99 - the other was "on sale" for $32.50 - I've never spent that much on one item!) But, they don't hover above my shoes - glorious!

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Willa
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Posted: Aug 03 2009 at 11:06am | IP Logged Quote Willa

I don't have any babies anymore so keep that in mind -- during the baby days my answers would have been different.

1. What is one thing you spend money on that many consider a luxury but you don't?

Books.

2. What is one thing you splurge on even though you consider it a luxury?

Netflix
Once in a while, packaged Costco foods like the lasagnas you can just stick in the oven.

3. What is one luxury you would never pay for even if money were no object?

Brand name clothes

4. What is the first luxury you would acquire if money were no object (or the first one you can think of anyway!).

Not a luxury, I guess, but I'd use the money to fix up this house to sell it OR rent it out and then buy a new place closer to civilization.

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