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teachingmyown
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| Posted: July 21 2008 at 1:24pm | IP Logged
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Congratulations! Can't help with the telling part. Our families might think we're a little crazy, but everyone is always happy about a new baby. (Or if not, they hide it well!  )
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In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
Remembering Today
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LisaR
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| Posted: July 21 2008 at 1:39pm | IP Logged
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congrats,  and praying for you. I like the idea of a card/email, maybe Martha's suggestion? or, having dh give the news by phone. my last choice would be in person.
let us know how it goes!
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Lisa
dh Tim '92
Joseph 17
Paul 14
Thomas 11
Dominic 8
Maria Gianna 5
Isaac Vincent 9/21/10! and...
many little saints in heaven!
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KC in TX
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Congratulations!!!!
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KC,
wife to Ben (10/94),
Mama to LB ('98)
Michaela ('01)
Emma ('03)
Jordan ('05)
And, my 2 angels, Rose ('08) and Mark ('09)
The Cabbage Patch
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folklaur
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| Posted: July 21 2008 at 1:50pm | IP Logged
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Rachel, I am so happy for you!
I feel so badly that you are nervous about sharing what should be an exciting and wonderful announcement!
I am thrilled for your family! Congratualtions!!!!
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asplendidtime
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| Posted: July 21 2008 at 3:09pm | IP Logged
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Coming back 'cuz I forgot to say Congratulations! I am so happy for you. Elizabeth's article made me cry!  
Here it is
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Rebecca~Mama to
Noah 17,
Katie 16,
Mary 14,
Tim 13,
Jonah 12,
Josh 10,
Zoe 9,
Will 7,
Peter 6,
Laura-Mae 4,
Emily-Joy 2,
Genevieve & Gabriella 1
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Mackfam
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| Posted: July 21 2008 at 5:44pm | IP Logged
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Congrats, Rachel!!!
Just tell 'em gets my vote. It isn't easy here either, but there's no hiding it when I get sick. It gives me something to offer up for during my sickness.
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Jen Mackintosh
Wife to Rob, mom to dd 19 , ds 16, ds 11, dd 8, and dd 3
Wildflowers and Marbles
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juststartn
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| Posted: July 21 2008 at 5:56pm | IP Logged
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Well, I am thinking of calling one weekday when they are at work, and leaving the message on their machine. THEN emailing my sisters/writing my grandmother...Then they can think about how to respond before they call back....
Rachel
__________________
Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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Erin
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Rachel
Congratulations And how nice that this time you won't have the stress of dh deploying immediately.
I have a friend who 'lets' her children tell her in-laws, apparently they aren't rude towards the children as the dc are so excited.
I like your last idea
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Erin
Faith Filled Days
Seven Little Australians
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juststartn
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DH rolled his eyes when I suggested the "cowardly" way of telling the answering machine. He isn't the one that has had to deal with the comments. Either he's not been around (deployed--it was alot easier to visit the folks when he was gone, since we didn't have to think about his work schedule), or he simply doesn't hear it.
He grew up in a family of 13 dc, in a large extended family. Not many--I don't think ANY of the extended relatives that have stayed Catholic have more than 3-4. I think 4 is the most. So his aunts are quite thrilled with our growing brood. My family, not so much. I get the impression that I am thought of as the "redneck uneducated nobody"--well, I *do* live in the country, and have wanted to since I was a little girl. Uneducated? Well, I didn't finish college, but I did get to spend a year in Europe, as a result (newlywed!). And I did get 2 1/2 yrs in before I married...Nobody? Well, being a nobody is fine.
its just one of those things that rankles and chafes at the nerves when it is your own family who thinks of you/treats you like that...as if a thinking, intelligent person couldn't possibly WANT these children! 
Okay, not going to soapbox before bed. DH just left for work, so I need to shut this down and get some shut eye before the boys want me/the birds need me/the garden needs tending again.
LOL
Rachel
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Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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Ruth
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| Posted: July 22 2008 at 7:09am | IP Logged
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Congratulations, Rachel!!!
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Ruth
mom to 7 miracles
My family blog
Loreto Rosaries
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Bookswithtea
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Congratulations, Rachel. And my vote is to send a cute card and add in Elizabeth's recent blog, too. Call the aunties who will be happy for you, and take the easy way out for the rest. Dh does not have hormones making him stew about this, either! 
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Blessings,
~Books
mothering ds'93 dd'97 dd'99 dd'02 ds'05 ds'07 and due 9/10
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10 Bright Stars
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Rachel,
I don't know about the machine. I would possibly just work yourself up into a self-righteous frenzy and then call. Seriously though, you could just work up your confidence and then call. If they say something rude, then counter if with a statement like, "With all due respect, I am surprised that someone as loving as you would have that reaction to the announcement of one of our new babies. I mean, you seem to adore the other ones. I am surprised you feel this way. We are just delighted that God would choose to bless us again." No, I have never done this either. But, wouldn't it be great?????? Just remember YOU are right and THEY are wrong. I always feel as if I have to explain myself, and people think that I am uneducated about how this occurs to. That is SO offensive!
Anyway, remember that the world will try to drag you down. When I sometimes fret about this, I try to think about when I am the Grandmother or Great Grandmother, sitting out on the porch and watching all the grandchildren play and I am the only one around to care, not the generation before me. What would I think about not having had the extra child then? Would I regret not being open to life due to the opinions of others. Of course we would regret that!! So, I try to think these sorts of thoughts when they get me down. We are talking about an eternal human soul. It is hard to visualize that reality with a verbal announcement that we are "expecting again" and people just tend to react. Maybe they are embarrased to react in a positive way, or they regret not having more, or they just don't know what to say. We can never fully know someone's motives or reasons for doing something.
Anyway, this is meant to be a pep talk.. A "yeah, Yeah, YEAH!" kind of thing to re-orient your thinking from being the one who is wrong to the one who has 2000 years of church teaching on your side!! Even if you do decide to call, make sure you are careful about what you say and phrase it as positively as possible. Maybe even write it down before you call since if it were me, I would accidentaly say SOMETHING self-deprecating in the course of the short message, regret it, get flustered and make a mess of that too!
I also realized yesterday that I forgot to say, "Congratulations Rachel!!!" You have a baby to hold.
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Kim married to Bob (22y)
Mom of 11 blessings:
Bobby 19, David 17, Noah 14,
Mary 12, Gracie 10,
Isabelle and Sophia 8,
Gabrielle 6,
William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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JodieLyn
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I do often send an email.. I just don't want to deal with it.. and I'm very careful with my words like Kim says.. making sure that what I say conveys that we're pleased and excited.. not embarrassed or sorry about the situation. And it does give them that time to react without me having to be privvy to it.. and then they can be nice to me when I do talk to them.
As far as the "don't you know what causes that" type of comment.. I try and keep in mind the sassy response of "sure do, do you need me to explain it to you".. since obviously I do know and don't you normally ask someone who knows if you need the info. 
Even though I don't say that.. it helps me respond from a better position than acting beaten or defeated by it.. the more confident you look and sound the less likely you are to get negative comments.. except from family 
The comment I really hate is "all they all yours" mainly because I've discovered that many people say it with no malice or put down.. they just aren't used to seeing us and actually want to know the answer. But others can use it as a put down.. and so it really requires attention from me to know which it is.. not that my response tends to change (usually just "yes they are" with a big grin) but I tend to get that drop in my stomach when I hear it until I'm clued into the other persons purpose.
Oh.. we live in a small town so most people know we have "a bunch" of kids.. but the other day just before my little guy was born I got to run to the store by myself and there was a new clerk there who apparently hadn't seen me with all the kids and I actually got asked if he was my first
I have to admit it was a bit fun to see her reaction when I casually answered "no my eighth"
Since I got most places with kids it's rare for me to get that.. though my dh does all the time.. especially when he's gone to training and there's people he's just meeting.
Though his recent answer for the incredulous looks about having 8 kids is to say we're trying for 12 by our 25th anniv.  News to me 
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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doris
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| Posted: July 22 2008 at 3:42pm | IP Logged
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First of all, congratulations!
I was really worried about how my in-laws would react to us having number 4 (which is excessive by British standards!). We put it off for ages and eventually the news just sort of seeped out -- after I'd refused wine, looked a bit peaky, etc. And in fact they were absolutely fine. Even mildly pleased. So you could go for the 'don't tell, don't deny' policy! After all, if you fear a negative reaction, you don't actually *have* to hurry to tell them... But OTOH that might cause a rift. Just depends on your family dynamics I suppose.
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Home educating in London, UK with dd (2000) ds (2002), dd (2004), ds (2008) and dd (2011).
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JodieLyn
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I'm not sure if it's related.. but.. we got a rather negative response to our #3. So when #4 came around.. we waited to tell a good bit longer than with the others and we haven't had any problems with announcements since.
I don't know if they clued into how much longer we waited to tell them and the reason or if they figured out that we weren't listening
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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juststartn
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| Posted: July 22 2008 at 9:15pm | IP Logged
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Well, we told the dc this morning (DHs idea) and then the dc and I called my parents and emailed my sisters. So far, so good. Of course, I've not heard from my parents again (We called them at work, I gave each dc a brief intro--"Lily/Layna is very happy and excited and wants to tell you something"--and then gave the phone to that dc, and then got the phone back, said a couple of words, and we hung up.
Dad sounded vaguely excited--he'll undoubtedly let loose a few "use some common sense" comments, mom will carp the entire time .
Rachel
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Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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trish
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Congratulations!!!!!!
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~ Trish ~
Wife to Les
Mom to 8 Wonderful Kids
+AMDG+
Saintly Soaps
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LeeAnn
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How about, "Hey, why don't you come for Thanksgiving or Christmas to visit this year? Why? To see your new grandbaby of course!"
And congratulations!
We have a Helena too, and call her Lena.
another LeeAnn :)
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my four children are 17, 15, 11 & 8 - all now attend public school - we read many 4Real recommended books at home
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juststartn
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LeeAnn, do you call her Leeena (long e) or Lena, like Len-uh? We call ours Layna (and spell it that way, too, even though her first name is pronounced Hell-in-uh (like "going to Hell in a handbasket"--sometimes DH will just look at me and say "in a handbasket"--and it gets us both laughing...lol).
She's named for one of DH's aunts (Helen) and one of my great-aunts (Ardith--that aunt died right after I found out about my pregnancy, otherwise, she would have been Helena Elizabeth, lol).
Rachel (who thinks Julia Faith or Joseph Benedict for this latest wee one being knit)
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Married DH 4/1/95
Lily 3/11/00
Helena(Layna) 5/23/02
Sophia 4/19/04
John 5/7/07
David 5/7/07
Ava Maria, in the arms of Jesus, 9/5/08
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10 Bright Stars
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I want a Joseph Benedict! In fact, I just recommended that name to my SIL. She went with Joseph Ethan instead, so maybe I will get to use Benedict sometime. I like Anthony too! Anyway, Julia Faith is a beautiful name. I say that are both terrific!
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Kim married to Bob (22y)
Mom of 11 blessings:
Bobby 19, David 17, Noah 14,
Mary 12, Gracie 10,
Isabelle and Sophia 8,
Gabrielle 6,
William Anthony 4, Joseph 3 and Luisa Marie - born in M
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: How to tell the family
