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teachingmyown
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| Posted: Oct 25 2007 at 12:49pm | IP Logged
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Can we discuss this? Different approaches, methods, etc. I am reading up on the Bradley method. I have never used it before, but am hoping for a better birth experience this time. My last two were inductions and got pretty stressful. #6 was my only epidural and I hated it.
I used Lamaze with my first few, and thought that it worked okay, but I never had the relaxation that Bradley talks about.
With my last, I labored some in a tub, on a birthing ball, in a chair. None of those things seemed to make a difference. I have always had a "conventional" pushing experience, on my back, legs up, etc.
So, you natural ladies, tell me about your methods and strategies. I would love to have a great birth experience.
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Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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JodieLyn
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bradley is excellent.. even if you don't follow it exactly.. the whole idea of focusing on what your body is doing and relaxing to allow it to happen is just really really helpful.. I really believe it helps contractions be more effective.
But from talking with others it really will depend on how you function best.. is distraction (thinking of things outside of yourself) more helpful or is focusing inward (thinking of what is going on and how to work with it) more helpful. For myself the later is. And since you only felt so-so about the Lamaze.. it may be that way for you too.
I homebirth with midwives.. I had one birth that was in the hospital with a CNM..
That was my first and I actually took the Bradley classes and used it much more book version than I have since then. But I love the story oft when I got to the hospital...
I tend towards calm anyway... so I waited out a contraction in the car and walked in. Waited politely to be noticed (we're talking less than a minute so hardly like it was a huge wait) They asked what i needed and I told them I was there to be checked to decide if I should be admited or leave.
I got this sorta blank stare..
"oh you think you're in labor?"
"No, I know I'm in labor and have been since 4am"
"oh" they look at each other and one of them gets up to deal with me 
she asks the standard questions about my labor and I answer them.. then she starts condencendingly telling me how those just don't sound very effective and it's probably still early... blah blah blah.
So she gets me in a room and goes to check dilation.. and all but falls off her stool.. after all her preparing for diappointment.. it turns out I was all but fully dilated 
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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SuzanneG
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| Posted: Oct 25 2007 at 2:24pm | IP Logged
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Molly:
So out of your 7 births, 6 of them were "natural", right? ONly #7 was with an epidural, correct? If this is the case, what is it about these natural births that you weren't satisfied with?
Are you in the hospital? home? birth center?
do you have a midwife or ob?
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Suzanne in ID
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teachingmyown
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They have all been born in the hospital. I have a CNM this time (and with #7). But with #7, even the CNM was too into "manipulating" labor. She stripped my membranes to get me into labor. (It was partially my impatience and partially because the sonogram indicated a very large baby, that caused our rushing things). After that didn't work, but I was already admitted, she broke my water. In the end I ended up on pitocin and that is just awful. I did not get an epidural, even though I was close to giving in. The CNM did help in that regard.
With all of them I have had IVs, external monitoring, and artificial ROM. So, not too natural, just no drugs. My dh is great talking me through and helping me breathe through the later contractions. But the idea of actually approaching it from a more relaxed attitude, instead of trying to distract myself, seems really appealing.
I find Dr Bradley's observations of other mammals in labor compared to women fascinating. I laughed out loud as he talked about the irregular breathing of Lamaze being so unnatural. Looking back at my labors he is so right. I have even ended up on oxygen because of hyperventilating. I never even considered it affecting the baby, though.
I also got to thinking about the effects of medications, even epidurals which are so standard. Most women don't even consider that the baby could be affected. My opposition to medication always stemmed more from personal choice than health concerns. As an L&D nurse, way back when, I always felt that the epidural births lacked something. I really felt this with my one epidural.
I had some Stadol with #3, which now that I am reading more deeply about these things, I wonder if that could have affected that child who has lots of "issues" .
I have always wanted to give birth at a birth center, but have never had one close enough or one that insurance would cover. DH will not go for a home birth.
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In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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JodieLyn
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Molly, you might want to consider a doula.. the good ones would be able to represent you to the hospital staff.. and push for the things you want.. so that you and your dh could concentrate on the actual laboring.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
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SuzanneG
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| Posted: Oct 25 2007 at 3:10pm | IP Logged
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Wow! Pictocin and NO EDPIDURAL! you're a champion!
I have had Licensed Midwives at home with all 4. I took a class with Penny Simkin before the first. While her class was not especially "Lamaze" or "Bradley" or any particular method.....her focus was on 3 things:
Relaxation, Rhythm, Ritual. Everyone finds their own version of them.
I don't try to distract myself, nec. Because I find my body has a mind of its own during the whole process, it helps to do the same thing over and over again....whether that's breathing a certain way, or moving a certain way or vocalizing the same way, or having someone touch the same spot each contraction, etc......all of this is comforting. I did find the relaxation exercises helpful....just practicing relaxing, letting your whole body relax.....b/c this is key in between contrax.
Since, you're in the hosp and dont quite feel like the CNM is COMPLETELY YOUR ADVOCATE. Could you look for a doula????? Here is the website for Doulas of North America (DONA). There is a purple "find a doula" section on the left or you can call them.
Having someone as your complete reasssurer (word?) and encourager who is knowledgeable is def. key. DH said that the thing that makes him OK with natural childbirth is that the midwives are completely normal about everything.....screaming, groaning, moaning, grimacing, grunting, giving up.....ho hum.
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Suzanne in ID
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nissag
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My MW recommends Bradley, too. I went natural for 5 of 6. My first - Cate - was w/ an epidural. The last three were born at home and in whatever position suited me. Gravity helped me so much. Sophie was quick as a wink and almost no pain. It was an easy, easy birth. I believe that was owing, in large part, to my diet throughout pregnancy.
With Louis, I had a big babe with a hand being born with the head. I took up a wide-open position on my knees, which is what is recommended for shoulder dystocia. It turned out to be perfect for the big guy, too!
In general, I do whatever happens to feel like it's working. Keep trying different things. Try to block out what other people are telling you and listen to your own body. If they're getting too much for you, ask them to leave for a bit. And I pray. I asked Our Blessed Mother and Saint Anne to be my midwives with Louis and I know that they were there helping me.
I can't believe it. He was born a year ago today. Oh, geez... Now I'm bawling. I need another one! LOL!
Molly, I wish that it were still common to have friends over for birth support. I'd be there for you!
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teachingmyown
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Dh would be hurt if I hired a doula. He is my advocate and very involved. With the epidural birth, he tried to talk me out of it because he knows me and knew I wouldn't be happy with that decision. Unfortunately, the labor was so out of control because of the pitocin levels, that I was unable to cope at all. The nurse got so angry with Dh for trying to talk me out of it. But I look back and he was right.
I am really just looking for different coping techniques, positioning, etc. My CNM will follow my lead, I think. She just isn't the whole-hearted natural childbirth provider that I think other midwives are. But dh and I can handle that.
With the last couple, I just became so impatient to have the baby that I lost focus. I would like to do it differently. I have already told dh that he needs to keep me patient when I hit 38 weeks and start crying to get this baby out! 
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In Christ,
Molly
wife to Court & mom to ds '91, dd '96, ds '97, dds '99, '01, '03, '06, and dss '07 and 01/20/11
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SuzanneG
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First 2, I spent a lot of time in the tub. didn't rent it with the second 2, and I spent a lot of time on hands and knees and swaying back and forth leaning against a wall.
the last birth, my girls were there and it helped to look at their faces to remind me that all this work and pain was actually FOR a human being! Not just to make me miserable
Pushing: one was born on the toilet....felt good to have my pelvis down like that.
2 were born on hands and knees
last one born sitting/lying back, knees up (traditional hospital position)....that's just where I ended up during transition and couldn't/wouldn't move after that.
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Ruth
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JodieLyn wrote:
bradley is excellent.. even if you don't follow it exactly.. the whole idea of focusing on what your body is doing and relaxing to allow it to happen is just really really helpful.. I really believe it helps contractions be more effective.
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I did Bradley with my last baby and it was the most relaxing birth ever. It's true. You focus on what is going on inside your body. This may sound like a no brainer, but I pictured the baby going down into the birth canal with every contraction, which distracted me from any pain until Dr. B told me it was time to push. I had no idea I had been in transition this whole time. It was actually painless, without any medication. Focusing on what's going on inside is extremely helpful. I hope I can do it again.
You'll be in my prayers.
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Ruth
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My family blog
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JodieLyn
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The thing is with a hospital.. it's hard for someone to be your labor support AND run interference with the hospital staff and rules and regs. Him trying to talk you out of an epidural is just the point. He shouldn't be having to talk you out of it (unless it's your own idea) AND be fighting the staff at the same time.. there should be someone to keep them away from you and offering it... and away from you so that he can talk to you about what YOU want and prefer.
The best coping technique is to keep away as much intervention as possible.. that includes IV's (sometimes a hospital will compromise with the thing in your arm but not hooked up) and especially includes AROM. With AROM you are "on the clock" your risks go up because of the rupture and passing time.. which means they're more likely to push "helping" labor progress. Without AROM you can just go home again if labor doesn't progress.. but with it.. it's either make it happen or c-section. Now you didn't say if it was earlier in labor or only during pushing that they'd do the AROM but if it's at all before the pushing stage..
I don't know how your other labors have been.. but for me.. for how my babies tend to be positioned.. I need gravity working for me.. I carry high clear into labor.. so on my feet or kneeling and leaning (more upright than hands and knees) are the best possible choice for me.. helps get baby down.. squatting is usually bad for me.. either full squat or sitting squat for the same reason.. when the baby is high you don't want to close the top of the pelvis.. and squatting does that.. while opening the bottom up more. I love counter pressure on my back so the standing or kneeling and leaning positions are also great for that.. usually standing is leaning as well.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
-Sir Walter Scott
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WayTruthLife
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I'm due shortly with #6 and very much reading up on the Bradley and Lamaze methods, too. I had an epidural for the first 4 babes. Last time, when expecting #5, I had a real desire to go natural. I never liked how my body felt after the epidurals.  I was induced with #5 due to being overdue and my impatience. They started Pitocin on me and I thought that was the end of my natural try at childbirth. Due to the grace of God and all the prayers that were being lifted up for me, I did it naturally!  I did Lamaze breathing. I sat in a glider chair and glided my whole labor. I had a focal point and breathed through the contractions. My labor lasted 3 hours and was far easier than the labor I experienced with my previous 4 labors.
I have only labored with the Lamaze so I know nothing else. I do know that I cannot lie down when laboring as the pain overtakes me. I find it much easier to sit up and rock. This gives my body something else to focus on and then again there is my focal point. I also do not like dh to touch, talk or be near me. Isn't that horrible?!  I much prefer to labor all alone. Although after reading the Bradley method, it sounds very common. Oh, I also push in the standard lie on your back, knees near your head position. It seems to work good. Last babe was born in two pushes.
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nicole marie
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I have only had one and she was a Bradley Birth. I HIGHLY recommend it. The doctor who delivered our dd, had never seen a Bradley Birth before and after my labor was amazed how fast and calm I had labored. I think he was also impressed with how involved my husband was. The Bradley really helped my husband be the coach in an amazing way. After our doctor delivered dd, he then had three other Bradley couples and he now highly recommends it to his patients.
It helped me to focus on something outside of the pain and taught me the value of relaxing through contractions.
God bless!!!
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God Bless!
Wife to DH and Mommy to one DD  (07/28/06) and one DS  (11/26/08)!
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folklaur
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Hi,
All three of mine were natural, all three were born in the hospital (well, first dd was almost born in the ambulance, and I had fully intended to be as drugged up at the time as I could be. But it happened pretty quickly, so I didn't end up with much choice at all. I had no classes or methods with that birth at all. And she was big (over 9 pounds).
Second time I figured last time wasn't so hard, so I did some of the lamaze classes. ds was turned sidewise and it was nothing like first birth experience, but I still went natural. Though I was asking for something there at the end but it was too late. Again, at hospital, but with great dr. who let me use any position, any method, any way I wanted, with no rushing, etc.
Third time, I am now scared after previous time. Taking hospital classes and see a video of Hypno-birthing. Intrigued. We look into it.
WOW. I KNOW it sounds goofy. I don't usually tell people, because yes, I know HOW goofy it sounds. BUT IT WORKS. The level of relaxation is just unbelievable. Labor went by SO fast for me - I had been standing to the side of the bed doing the breathing & visualization, and I was sure only like 20 minutes had passed, because I said to DH, "How can I be ready to push already?" He said it had been like 2 hours. (The woman in the room down the hall was HOWLING and that is the only thing that was getting to me. I mean, she was screaming, really screaming.) They didn't think I was in "real labor" as I was just so calm.
(I declined the pit shot after, and ended up losing a LOT of blood, and having a bad after birth experience, but the birth part was fine. I remember it as being a really calm time in my memory, the room was dim, the music was on, the rooms at this hospital are nice, so it is all around a good memory, YWIM?)
They even did a piece about Hypnobirthing on like 20/20 or 60 minutes, I forget which.
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JodieLyn
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| Posted: Oct 25 2007 at 4:54pm | IP Logged
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Laura.. get arnica.. it's a homeopathic.. my current midwife gives it immediately after birth.. and it's incredible at slowing the bleeding.. my first 3 I was borderline hemmorage WITH a shot of pitocin after each... with the arnica for the last 4 I've been on the low end of bleeding.. and no pit.
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Jodie, wife to Dave
G-18, B-17, G-15, G-14, B-13, B-11, G-9, B-7, B-5, B-4
All men who have turned out worth anything have had the chief hand in their own education.
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Barbara C.
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I took Lamaze class with the first one, and I feel that it did help quite a lot. What didn't was being overwhelmed with the childbirth experience? I allowed my doctor to pop my bag for their convenience, and things went down-hill from there. I don't even want to get into it all.
With my second, at the recommendation of my new doctor, I switched to the CNM's in the group. I think a CNM is only better than a doctor if they are willing to listen to you and offer helpful suggestions. My CNM was amazing. She didn't harass me to push as soon as my body started telling me to; she gave me time to get my head together as long as the baby was doing fine. She recommended different positions and knew just the right spot to rub. My second experience was so much better.
So, I have to ask you if there is a different CNM you could switch to. That could make a big difference in itself. If not, consider a doula, not so much to act as an advocate, but doulas are also supposed to know where to rub and positions to try. The doula can be a kind of back-up midwife.
I also read everything I could get my hands on. One of the Bradley books I read gave some exercises to do (squats and stretches). I really liked Ina May's Guide. She talked about how singing can help loosen jaw, rectum, and vaginal muscles, and she had one mother who literally sang through her contractions. I just tried to come up with a bag full of tricks (although I never made it to singing). I'll probably start re-reading everything again in the next few months to prepare for the next one.
Good luck!!
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Barbara
Mom to "spirited" dd(9), "spunky" dd (6), "sincere" dd (3), "sweet" dd (2), and baby girl #5 born 8/1/12!!
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SuzanneG
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Those of you who have had a "Bradley Birth", did you take the classes or just read the book/s?
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Suzanne in ID
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Bookswithtea
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I've had 5 births without drugs or intervention, all with CNM's in a CNM friendly hospital except one that was at home. A CNM birth is what I have planned for this birth, too.
I really prefer the Bradley method of breathing. Several pregnancies back, rather than take a full class, I took a Bradley "refresher course" since I was used to L and D already, and it was just enough to give me some encouragement. The calm slow breathing and imagining the baby moving down really helps me.
I tend to be like someone else said, where the nurses don't believe I'm in labor until they check me. I even fooled my home birth midwife!
My dh and I do all the laboring work together, but a doula to keep the staff away is helpful, if you want to consider it. If your midwife is amenable, then tell her (and dh, so that you don't lose your resolve) that you don't want her rushing things this time. Stripping membranes etc is like trying to jump start a car in the coldest weather...it just never works quite as well as when your body is fully ready.
I try to walk as much as possible, and I have been known to not show up after an hour for them to check the heartrate. I hide and avoid the external monitoring as much as possible because it just slows things down for me when I have to get into bed. I feel like I lose all my momentum.
In my last delivery, I refused to push until *I* was ready, mentally, and the CNM was fine with that. I waited out three or four pushing contractions until I had a big urge and it made a HUGE difference, not only in how easily the baby slid out but also in my recovery (much less bleeding and trauma to the area in general).
I specifically request that the bed be set up so that I am not on my back (sitting upright helps me a lot) and I also let people know I don't want any nurses shouting at me to hold my breath and push while they count to ten.  This drives me crazy and makes me feel lost and out of control. How can I concentrate on anything with some L and D nurse yelling in my ear while other ones are saying, "push push push" a billion times??? Like I don't know I need to push! A calm environment helps me to stay calm, and people shouting at me is not conducive to that.
I'm thinking a lot about L and D too. No use pretending I don't remember what its like. I'm *not* looking forward to it at all, and I'm worried its going to be harder than the others, being a 'grand multi' mama...I'm trying not to worry about it too much, but I'm not having a lot of luck with that...
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almamater
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Molly,
I am a certified Bradley Method teacher. A proper Bradley class will require 12, 2 hour classes from you and your husband. This is wonderful if you can swing it, but you could also try reading Natural Childbirth the Bradley Wayand Ina May's Guide to Childbirth. The latter has a few wierd moments in it, but many of my students have enjoyed it. Both should be available at the library and local bookstores in addition to online. Also check out the Bradley websitefor more reading.
Let me know if I can help any further.
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~jennifer in tx
mommy of ds(11),dd(8),dd(6), dd(3),& ds (6/08)
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SuzanneG
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Bookswithtea wrote:
I'm thinking a lot about L and D too. No use pretending I don't remember what its like. I'm *not* looking forward to it at all, and I'm worried its going to be harder than the others, being a 'grand multi' mama...I'm trying not to worry about it too much, but I'm not having a lot of luck with that...
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I watched #4's birth video with my girls the other day and I was thinking to myself, "A scheduled C-section looks awfully good after watching that."
My current midwife has MANY Christian-pro-life-large families....and she is adamant about grand-multiparas laboring differently and having diff't issues than those with 1, 2, or 3. She has lots of "tricks" up her sleeve for grand-multiparas. (she has 10 dc herself).
ETA: I did not mean the c-sec are "easier", only that at that moment....doing anything to avoid that pushing stuff sounded better.
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Suzanne in ID
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4Real Forums : Mothering and Family Life
Topic: Natural Childbirth
