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Angie Mc
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| Posted: Nov 17 2007 at 10:06am | IP Logged
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SallyT wrote:
It has also occurred to me, in praying the Angelus, that when we say with Mary, "Behold the handmaid of the Lord/Be it unto me according to thy word," we are still being not only obedient but also open to life in a new way: open to the changeable life of our own bodies, and to our own aging and mortality. That's not always what we mean when we say "open to life," but it's certainly part of the package.
Actually, when I first began praying the Angelus, at a time when I was unplanned-ly pregnant (in the days when I thought in those terms), and life circumstances didn't make it easy to rejoice at first, I learned obedience and openness to God's will at Mary's knee. I'm still finding the Angelus to be an incredibly helpful and comforting discipline, praying it daily with the children, and I would recommend it to anyone.
Sally |
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We say the Angelus daily at lunch. Your insight into this prayer has been a blessing to me. Thanks you, Sally.
I was thinking about other difficult transitions I've needed to make in life and for the most part I've avoided most "my life changed on a dime" moments. For example, with my children, I have no idea exactly when they weaned, started using the potty on their own, or moved to their own bed. I've never experienced the traumatic first day at childcare, first day at school, and the like. I tend to wake up one day and notice the end result of a gentle process. God must know that I have a difficult time with surprises (even good ones) and abruptness. Since 2001, when my third child was three, I've been in the process of thinking that I might not have another child. When JP was born 2.5 years ago, I couldn't believe the gift! His birth healed much of my aching heart but did not close my hope for more. I'll be 44 in Decemeber and still hope, and I thank God that I don't *know* where I am in my process yet. And I hope this group is still here when I do know  .
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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Bridget
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| Posted: Nov 17 2007 at 10:43am | IP Logged
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My mother is 68. Here is what she has told me about the transition we are struggling with.
The yearning for another baby never really goes away. Our love of physically nurturing babies and young children does grow into emotional nurturing for our husband, older children and eventually grown children and grandchildren. And is very satisfying.
But being pregnant and having young children is sort of a badge. It is an outward of expression of who we are. It shows the world that we are godly women who embrace our role as mothers and nurturers.
When that ends we have a hard time identifying who we are to ourselves and to the world. For all anyone knows we are a career woman who retired and moved to AZ to 'find herself'.
We have to be confident about what we have done and what we still have to do, that it is God's will for us. His calling. He is not done with us after the baby years. Our families and families around us still need us to embrace motherhood, marriage and homemaking.
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Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
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St. Ann
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| Posted: Nov 19 2007 at 4:41am | IP Logged
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Gosh Bridget, your mother is so wise.
Thank you for sharing her wisdom with us.
This means so much to me.
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Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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St. Ann
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| Posted: Nov 19 2007 at 4:45am | IP Logged
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I will be 45 in January and still hope, although I am slowly coming to the realization that it probably just won't happen anymore.
Our baby will be 4 in December and I still call her 'baby' sometimes.
I am open for a miracle!
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Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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hylabrook1
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| Posted: Nov 19 2007 at 9:19am | IP Logged
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Bridget -
Thank you so much for sharing your mother's wisdom. You are blessed to have such a lovely mother. You have given me much to meditate on, as I try to live out this phase of my life.
Peace,
Nancy
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jackiemomof7
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Bridget,
What a wonderful mother you have. Such wisdom in those words. She really hit it on the mark regarding the "badge". Every since I have been unable to have more children, I feel like I can not outwardly express my desire for more children. I find I don't fit in with any "group". As my youngest turns 12 in December I find myself crying more often for more children and feeling like my life as a "mother" is coming to an end. I know that is not true, but the ache that I feel makes it hard to remind myself that God must have other plans for me.
Thank you again for letting us know the words your mother gave you. I will meditate on them this week during Thanksgiving and hope that the Lord will speak to me and calm my heart and mind.
God bless,
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Jackie wife to Jim for 27!! years, proud army mom of Chris(25),Chef Matthew(24) and Sister Grace of Benedectines (21),Joshua(19),Nicholas(17),Jaymee(15), Elizabeth(13) and 2 in Heaven.Grandma to 3!
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jdostalik
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| Posted: Nov 23 2007 at 9:51am | IP Logged
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I turn 42 next month. I am already feeling the strong desire for another baby and my sweet little guy just turned 10 months old. I am really enjoying him sooo much--kissing his ten toes and ten fingers every day....he may well be the last blessing but I hope he is not. Bridget, thank you for your post--your mother is a wise woman.
Hugs to everyone!
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Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
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St. Ann
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| Posted: Sept 16 2011 at 2:02am | IP Logged
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I just wanted to bump this thread. I got and get a lot of encouragement from it.
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Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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jdostalik
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| Posted: Sept 16 2011 at 5:43am | IP Logged
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Me, too, Stephanie...in fact, it made me tear up reading through these posts...I was the last one who posted here in 2007 and my "baby" is now 4...I still try to kiss his toes and fingers every day.  I have conceived four new souls for Our Lord (lost through miscarriage) since his birth. But now, at 45, I haven't been pregnant in over a year. I think the Lord is gently telling me something. I keep praying "Thy Will Be Done" and cuddle and love on my kids who are all still home and need me more than ever. Hugs to all.
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Jennifer in TX
wife to Bill, mom to six here on earth and eight in heaven.
Let the Little Ones Come
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JennGM
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Our childbearing days are over, due to serious health risks. Our "baby" is almost 4, too. This week we discussed purging our strollers. And our baby car seat is past the allowed 7 years...so I know that needs to be gone, too.
And all those bins of baby clothes? What to do?
The hard days are when our youngest son is asking and wanting to have a baby, and when my sisters and sister-in-law have these beautiful cuddly babies -- it makes me miss those days.
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Jennifer G. Miller
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JodieLyn
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Jenn, I've always thought when I start to purdge things that a crisis pregnancy center would be the perfect location for the baby clothes.. I know how much it means to me to have those things ready for my baby.. how much more for someone who has litle to start with. Somehow helping someone who really needs it, sometimes makes it easier to part with stuff too.
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JennGM
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| Posted: Sept 16 2011 at 2:57pm | IP Logged
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That is such a good point, Jodie! That will motivate me to give it sooner! Thanks for the reminder. We have a very good clinic here.
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Jennifer G. Miller
Wife to & ds1 '03 & ds2 '07
Family in Feast and Feria
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St. Ann
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JodieLyn wrote:
| Jenn, I've always thought when I start to purdge things that a crisis pregnancy center would be the perfect location for the baby clothes.. I know how much it means to me to have those things ready for my baby.. how much more for someone who has litle to start with. Somehow helping someone who really needs it, sometimes makes it easier to part with stuff too. |
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Down in south Florida, the crisis pregnancy centers I know were only allowed to take brand new items for children under 3 years of age. I was pretty surprised at that.
In my case I was able to give most of my baby and toddler clothes to 2 sets of our girls' Godparents who were just starting a family. It was very personal and it was a big help for them. I love seeing photos of their girls and I recognize the little outfits.
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Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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St. Ann
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JennGM wrote:
The hard days are when our youngest son is asking and wanting to have a baby, and when my sisters and sister-in-law have these beautiful cuddly babies -- it makes me miss those days. |
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Jenn, even my 15 year old was still hopeful that I would have another baby! and I am 48!
I often had to check myself not to be impatient with her when she would ask. The impatience I felt came from the hurt that I could not fulfill this wish.
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Stephanie
Wife and mother to Hannah '96, Maria '99, Dorothea '01, Helena '03
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cecilia4kids
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Well, its seem that I was to read this today. And see that I am not the only one who is so sad over this. My youngest will turn 3 soon. And today I got my period which I was so so sure that I was pregnant and I even spend $12 stupid dollars to buy the test to make my dreams true and my temperatures were telling me so until this morning.. the bomb drops and my friend comes. The sadness takes over at time and just want to stay in bed. I just pray one more, just if I can have one more baby. I feel its worst when I lost one 2 years ago and I think about how old she would of been, etc. And of course my dear friends here having babies and my children even praying to God for that baby boy (we have 3 girls and 1 boy) and I just want him to answer our prayers before my youngest gets older. I had them about 2 years apart and I wanted them that close and I will take another children when God is ready for me. I think the hardest part is letting go and seeing God's will in it all. I think about Our Blessed Mother and I can imagine, her human mother being would of like to have more than one but she knew that she was chosen for this greater role of the mother of Our Lord! She has a way of comforting me! I will keep you ladies in my prayers!
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Cecilia
In love with my Family, mama to C (02) G(05), N(07), S(08) and Blessed with 2 Angels
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asplendidtime
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Thank-you for this thread, it was truly beautiful to read, such love for children and willingness to give life, at this season is so encouraging. I am in my mid-thirties and think about this from time to time and wonder at how very full, full, full life feels. I am worried about it reaching a pinnacle and getting less, less, less. It was just such a comfort to read you all sharing from your hearts.
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Mary 14,
Tim 13,
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Angie Mc
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My baby is now 6 and we've suffered a miscarriage and losses via fostering and our hopes for adoption. Yes, I am sad. Deeply sad. And yet, God's grace heals my heart so gently...so, so gently.
I can't believe it but I'm actually starting to think about grandbabies - lovely! And I've told my children that my philosophy about keeping littles close to mom has changed. I definitely think that grandbabies need to spend tons of time with their grandma  .
Like I said, only the grace of God could help me through this transition. Blessed be the name of the Lord .
Love,
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Angie Mc
Maimeo to Henry! Dave's wife, mom to Mrs. Devin+Michael Pope, Aiden 20,Ian 17,John Paul 11,Catherine (heaven 6/07)
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cheesehead mom
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This is a beautiful thread, one I think I will come back to--thank you all for sharing. I too have 7 beauties but will be 44 in January and have hit the point where this is the longest I have gone without being pregnant in 21 years. I so want to embrace my dear Lord's plan with a beautiful FIAT and do well until my period comes then I find that Satan is quite cunning and things get under my skin and quickly my "yes Lord whatever you will" becomes "Why Lord are you saying no again? DO you think I cannot handle another--do I not cooperate with your grace--am I not patient enough?" and so on. Ugh, good thing God is so very patient--as I still have a long way to go in learning to emrace his beautiful plan.
Laura
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KauaiCatholic
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thanks for bumping this; I LOVE this thread. read it first when I was 39 (and sneaking in here  ) and had only 2 but thought we were done for infertility reasons. now I'm almost 42 and rejoicing in our 3rd ... but being told we SHOULD be done for health reasons. but the older 2 are begging for "the next one." they even talk to my empty belly. 
so ... sad. love all the encouragement here.
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Viviane
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We can do no great things; only small things with great love. -- Blessed Teresa of Calcutta
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4Real Forums : St. Anne's Tearoom: Growing in Wisdom over 40
Topic: Sad
