Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: How to talk so teens will listen Post ReplyPost New Topic
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Cindy
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Joined: Feb 01 2005
Location: Texas
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Posts: 235
Posted: Aug 24 2005 at 8:07am | IP Logged Quote Cindy
Molly,

If no one has mentioned it yet, I'd suggest How to Really Love Your Teenager by Ross Campbell MD. It is short and practical and hits on many of the ideas above. He concentrates on Focused Attention- really being open and listening to your teen and tells you exactly how to do it... among other ideas.

I have found one thing that helps me when my 15yo son throws up that wall ... is to be still and imagine myself in his shoes. I remember vividly being that age. My parents seeming so bogus. Longing for freedom and more 'real-ness' in life. I realize that my son has a different environrment than I did growing up and I am offering him deeper relationships and faith, which I did not have. But I have to realize no matter how much I am doing right, he will have that inner need to seperate, and often won't know why or where the feelings are coming from.

That increases my need to be emotionally strong, and filled (Campbell insists on this!) to be there for him when he is struggling.

Anyway, when I do imagine this it helps me be more patient and use the techniques in the books, ect and most importantly not take it so persoanlly that I put up my own walls, too.

hth

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Cindy in Texas

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