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Cheryl
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do you wait to try again? Do you wait at all? My doctor has recommended waiting until I have 2 normal cycles. He said that the chances of another miscarriage are greater right now. A woman I know who is an NFP instructor suggested waiting 1 cycle. Waiting seems unnatural to me, but I certainly don't want to increase my chances of another miscarriage. What have you done?
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Cheryl
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JennGM
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Both times I waited, but it was because I had a D&C the first time and a laparascopy the second time. I think a lot depends on your feelings, how far along you were, did you have extra bleeding and such. How much space between your two miscarriages? Were they in a row (sorry my mind is drawing a blank)?
I think I would wait at least one cycle, two might be best. Dose up on the prenatals, Folic Acid, B6, Magnesium, Evening Primrose Oil, Vitamin E for two months and then have a good base to start trying.
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Cheryl
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I had one in jan 2005, a healthy baby in mar 2006, then this miscarriage in aug 2007. I must have waited a while after the first one. I can't remember.
Great idea about the vitamins. I have a big supply here and I haven't even thought about taken them.
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Cheryl
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PDyer
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We waited two months at the doctor's suggestion.
To be frank, it really didn't cross my mind to do anything other than follow 'doctor's orders'; the decision was more a function of my mindset at that point in my life than the result of a prayerful discernment process.
Praying for you.
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JodieLyn
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didn't wait.. got pregnant immediately.. carried to term.
know quite a few women who do the same..
of course the doc's also suggest spacing babies AT LEAST two years apart.. and I don't listen to that either.
And since they're blessings from God.. seems He doesn't think I need to wait either.
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trish
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I've had three miscarriages. After the first one we didn't have another baby for 3 years. With the other two both times we didn't wait and had another baby right away. In retrospect... both of those pregnancies were hard. Alot of spotting and cramping. Bed rest almost throughout the first 4 months. Knowing what I know now I can look back and say my body was very unhealthy. I was probably lacking everything my body needed to maintain a healthy pregnancy. My thyroid was out of wack too. After our last baby my dh and I thought and prayed hard about having more children right away (if that was God's plan for us). We felt that I should do all I could to get myself healthy. And we knew God would let us know when or if we were ready for another.  It took just over a year or so but God gave me the desire to have another baby and I knew my body was ready. Unfortunately I didn't lose any weight from the last baby but aside from the nausea this has been a wonderful pregnancy for me. No spotting or cramping. I don't have that dread of waking up in the morning and going to the bathroom. (spotting). You will know what to do. What Jenn said about dosing up is good advice. Definitely something I can recommend. Oops. I've turned this into a much longer post than I meant to. Sorry. 
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I've conceived again as early as 2 weeks after a miscarriage and carried a healthy baby to term. I agree with Jodie completely! I wouldn't wait.
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jackiemomof7
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I have had 2 miscarriages and after each one I was pregnant the very next month. I was told also to wait 2 months but I just placed myself in God hands and I was pregnant each time before I ever had a complete cycle. Each of those pregnancies were fine both were carried to full term and I had no other problems with them. Listen to your heart,you will know!
God bless,
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Elizabeth
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I didn't wait at all after my first miscarriage and I was pregnant the first full cycle after the D&C. We welcomed Patrick nine months later. The second time, we hoped and prayed and tried for 20 months before conceiving Karoline. When I look at that, I can see how very little is up to me.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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JennGM
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Elizabeth wrote:
| The second time, we hoped and prayed and tried for 20 months before conceiving Karoline. When I look at that, I can see how very little is up to me. |
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I was going to add something similar. My miscarriages were almost a year apart. We did wait 2 cycles, but we didn't conceive for a while. It's all in God's hands, really.
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trish
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Yes, it's definitely in God's hands. We didn't conceive this little one for 3 months after we were ready and for 3 years after my first miscarriage.
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Rachel May
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My friend, an NFP doc, told me she looked her doctor in the eye and said, "You know that's a load of ...." when he told her to wait two cycles to let her body get back in shape. She said that they tell you your body needs the break, but they are really concerned about the emotional stresses of having lost a baby. She has not waited and had several successful pregnancies, but I think considering the emotional side is important too.
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LisaR
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If you are concerned about anything, it should not be the length of time between conceptions, (after a miscarriage) but your health. "Waiting" two months or whatever they say but eating poorly, for example seems to make much less sense than acting as if from day one after the miscarriage that your body is indeed preparing for a new little one.
It might take one cycle of "trying" or it might take 20. But I'd act as if it could happen at any time, and try when I wanted.
just my .02, and I teach sympto thermal NFP, fwiw
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Cheryl
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Thanks for all of your input. I hope you don't mind if I think aloud here. I'd love to hear more of your thoughts.
My doctor told me the reason for waiting two months was that my uterine lining might be ?? too thin??? I can't remember exactly what he said. He did say that some women get pregnant right away and they have healthy babies, which some of you have confirmed.
I'm not really concerned about getting pregnant right away. I would be happy if it happened now, or in six months....or nine months... I might be bummed if it took years. I think I'm more concerned with the abstaining. Sorry, I'm getting personal here, but you can probably understand that we've already abstained for quite some time during the miscarriage and after it when I was on "pelvic rest."
I WOULD like to have a couple of months to get my body in shape. My abdominal muscles need A LOT of toning and I could lose about 5 pounds. I like your suggestions of taking vitamins and eating better.
But on the other hand.... Why would I have the desires that seem to be stronger during the fertile time if my body would not be ready to carry a baby right away if I conceived? I hope you can understand what I mean.
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Cheryl
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Angel
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I've never heard that about the uterine lining, Cheryl. My doctor told me to wait a cycle because I had a D&C and they wanted to make sure that there was nothing left.  (I am not exactly sure how to say that without it sounding terrible.)
We did wait a cycle, but as it turned out, it didn't matter... it took 5 more months to conceive.
--Angela
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Cheryl wrote:
| Thanks for all of your input. I hope you don't mind if I think aloud here. I'd love to hear more of your thoughts. |
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I am very sensitive to being too personal and giving my opinion in a matter that really isn't my business.
I do think I can say this much, however. Ours (meaning mine) is a very grave situation. I don't wish to revisit the details. However, even knowing that very grave context, I've been advised to consider *both* purposes of the marital act, unitive and procreative, in evaluating whether to abstain on any given day of the month. This is a prayerful decision left only to us, and we do the best we can with God's help.
I hope I've not said too much. If I have please accept my apologies.
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LisaR
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Patty, I totally understand. I am facing grave reasons. In fact, I am a medical "miracle" as literally there is no record of any woman with the combination of diseases I have carry 5 babies to term. (although I lost a twin with 4 of those pregnancies, I ovulate twice)
anyway, I did not really think that was the issue at hand here, but I DO want you to know I am with you.
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PDyer
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LisaR wrote:
| anyway, I did not really think that was the issue at hand here, but I DO want you to know I am with you. |
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Oh I don't think grave reasons are the situation here either.
I'm a bit confused though by what you're saying and I don't want to muddy up Cheryl's thread so could you mind speaking more plainly in a PM, please?
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Patty
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Cay Gibson
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PDyer wrote:
| I don't want to muddy up Cheryl's thread so could you mind speaking more plainly in a PM, please? |
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Patty,
How open, caring, and considerate you are to Lisa's burden. Lisa is lucky to have your ear to confide in.
Back to Cheryl's questions...
Cheryl, I was told after my miscarriage to wait 3 cycles. Mainly the dr. requested that so he would have some idea as to when conception took place. He said many women's bodies are thrown off after a miscarriage. But with women like us who know how to read our bodies, I think the protocol is a little different.
Friends told me that chances of getting pregnant directly after a miscarriage were high because I already had pregnancy hormones in my system. I got pregnant about 3 months after the miscarriage, but I think I only had two periods before conceiving. Garrett was full-term and very healthy. I think physically my body was fine. I was more a basket-case mentally and walked through that first trimester on eggshells praying I wouldn't miscarry again.
I'll be praying for you, dear.
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Dear Cheryl, my wonderful, pro-life, NFP only OB (can you tell how highly I think of him?) said that standard protocol is to advise waiting from 3 to 6 cycles.
However he has many patients carry a pregnancy to term after conceiving immediately following a loss. He said that the lining can be quite healthy and capable right away. It regenerates itself quickly.
His advice is to pray first. (He will pray with the patient for discernment from the Holy Spirit.) Then to discern how the mom feels physically. If she feels healthy, strong and ready to go... she probably is.
Ask Bobby to pray too. Together you will arrive at your answer.
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Topic: How long after miscarriage
