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Michaela
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I have no one else to share this with, so I've come here.
A group of mommies....in my generation  will understand why I'm baffled.
My mom had a few friends over and the discussion turned to the Kim family who were lost in Oregon.
Most of the women 65+ years old agreed they would never have thought of nursing the 4yo. I assured them that if they were feeding their 7 mo old and knew that their 4yo wasn't getting any nourishment....they'd also feed the 4yo.
Nope.
They agreed it was something they wouldn't have thought to do. 
So, I said even if they expressed milk into a cup...they'd feed their other child! (said gently & with a smile)
Nope.
Not something they would have thought about.
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Michaela
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Bridget
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My mom would have. She even nursed her adopted babies.  She was such a rebel.
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Bridget, happily married to Kevin, mom to 8 on earth and a small army in heaven
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mom2mpr
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My Mom would not have--but she didn't nurse her babies. She always followed the instructions of doctors, etc. to a "t" including giving such and such formula every x hours. I am a rebel, drives her crazy--and still nursing my almost 4 year old-occasionally  I was kind of psyched to hear the Mom in OR did it--I think she was nursing her even though the media said it was for nourishment
Just my thoughts and I understand Michaela!
Anne
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Rebecca
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I thought this article did a nice job of explaining things.
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Lisbet
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My mom would've have I think. My brother and I are both adopted and she tells me now that she wishes she would've tried nursing us. (FWIW, I've nursed a few of my kids until 4 and 5 years!)
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Alice R
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My mom nursed me. 
She did tell me that people laughed at her and thought she was gross for doing it.
She continued on and was also one of those "rebels" who seemed to have raised one of those "rebel homeschoolers".
My mom was born in 1934.
Alice
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Elizabeth
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My mom warned me that my milk will dry up any minute. After all, she reasoned, I'm nearly forty-one. "Surely people don't have milk in their forties !"
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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kingvozzo
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Michaela wrote:
Most of the women 65+ years old agreed they would never have thought of nursing the 4yo. I assured them that if they were feeding their 7 mo old and new that their 4yo wasn't getting any nourishment....they'd also feed the 4yo.
Nope.
They agreed it was something they wouldn't have thought to do.
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I really find this hard to believe. When not in the situation, it may seem improbable, but I really doubt that any mother would be able to feed one child without sharing that with the other child.
Wasn't it "The Grapes of Wrath" where Rose of Sharon shares her breastmilk with a starving adult? It's not unheard of....
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jdostalik
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Wow, this story is so wonderful, yet it's so sad that the father didn't make it! 
My mother breastfed all of us in the mid-60's right before it became the "hip" thing to do! She has always been so supportive of my breastfeeding which really helped me especially in the beginning with my first little one!
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Martha
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That's just about the sadest combination of hope and sorrow I've ever read. What an amazing and heartborken woman Kati Kim must be. Her children and her husband (where ever he may be) are very blessed to have her.
Maybe the older ladies you were speaking to mean they just wouldn't have thought that it would work? I probably would have done it, but I don't know that I would have expected it to work if I didn't know what I do about breastfeeding. I certainly wouldn't have thought that if I wasn't eating I would be able to make enough for 2 dc for 9 days - how long did she have food available I wonder...
Isn't there a scene in the Grapes of Wrath where a woman bfeeds a grown sick man because it's all they have? Could be wrong... Been a VERY long time since I read/watched that.. I remember all the boys in class snickering while we watched the movie in english class in high school. 
Honestly, I can't believe anyone would really think they wouldn't do this. I'd cut my arm off if I had to and think it well worth the loss if it saved my kid. I can't imagine just bf-ing one of them and doing nothing while the other starved.
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Elizabeth
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Martha wrote:
| Isn't there a scene in the Grapes of Wrath where a woman bfeeds a grown sick man because it's all they have? Could be wrong... Been a VERY long time since I read/watched that.. I remember all the boys in class snickering while we watched the movie in english class in high school. |
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It's at the end. That's what I thought of immediately when I heard the Kim story.
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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MaryM
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I really think that while these women say they would not have thought of it they are speaking from an experience of not actually being in a crisis situation. People in life and death situations are going to be facing a circumstance they never imagined and will often act in ways they never thought they would. But they are faced with a dire reality and will look for alternatives. So there is good reason to believe that it may indeed have been something they would have doen when in the situation.
Like Martha said I would fear more that some women would worry that they had run out of milk and couldn't sustain a child for that long without food for themselves. My thought it she was probalby knowledgeable of breastfeeding enough to not succomb to those fears. I work with women all the time who think they are out of milk for reasons that are not accurate - their perceptions are inaccurate.
Faced with this situation my mom who is in that 65+ category would have nursed any and all children as well. But she was definitely in the minority in her time. If you consider that the women you are talking about were raising their children in the 1960s and 70s. In 1960 only 18 percent of women were even breastfeeding a newborn and that number fell precipitously in the few weeks following discharge from the hospital. So we are talking about a generation of women that in general (there ae exceptions as we've heard) who have a very large disconnect with breastfeeidng and understanding how it works.
In addition to the Grapes of Wrath mention (which I also immediately thought of when I read this thread) you occasionally hear stories about how breastmilk saved lives in a similar situation - several years ago there was mention of a small group of refugees (from ??) who were lost at sea near SE US and were kept hydrated because a lactating woman was able to express breastmilk for them.
And, Elizabeth there are accounts of wet nurses lactating into their 70's!!!
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Elizabeth
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MaryM wrote:
And, Elizabeth there are accounts of wet nurses lactating into their 70's!!! |
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She'll be horrified to hear that. The entire conversation was one of those "That's a darling baby and you're really very lucky but we won't try anything so foolish again, now, will we..." mom talks. 
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Elizabeth Foss is no longer a member of this forum. Discussions now reflect the current management & are not necessarily expressions of her book, *Real Learning*, her current work, or her philosophy. (posted by E. Foss, Jan 2011)
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hylabrook1
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Elizabeth -
As you undoubtedly realize, our moms are both the best and, at times, the worst...
My last child was born just before my 42nd birthday and I stopped nursing right around my 46th. And there was milk to express for several months after. I had to consult a surgeon about another minor problem with my breast, and he couldn't believe I was still lactating.
Oh well, just because most people don't often see "older" women nursing, it doesn't mean it doesn't happen.
Peace,
Nancy
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Michaela
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Martha wrote:
| Honestly, I can't believe anyone would really think they wouldn't do this. I'd cut my arm off if I had to and think it well worth the loss if it saved my kid. I can't imagine just bf-ing one of them and doing nothing while the other starved. |
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That's why I told them that they wouldn't be able to feed one child while the other complained about hunger & thirst.
It didn't bother me until I got home and thought about what that really meant. My brother & I are 3 1/2 years apart in age. So, my mom was telling me she would have fed him, but I would've been on my own. I honestly don't think she would do that. I have more confidence in her than apparently she has in herself.
I'm in agreement with everyone here, in a crisis it wouldn't be hard to come to the solution.....even for their generation.
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Michaela
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Jamberry77
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This story reminds me of a book on the Eucharist that I once read about how a woman who was in a building during an earthquake and was trapped with her child, how she cut her finger and fed her blood to her child to keep the child alive. This story (maybe it was just a made up story to illustrate the point, I can't remember) was to show that Jesus feeds us with His own Body and Blood to save our souls.
Kelly
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4Real Forums : Tea and Conversation
Topic: older generation & breastfeeding
