Oh, Dearest Mother, Sweetest Virgin of Altagracia, our Patroness. You are our Advocate and to you we recommend our needs. You are our Teacher and like disciples we come to learn from the example of your holy life. You are our Mother, and like children, we come to offer you all of the love of our hearts. Receive, dearest Mother, our offerings and listen attentively to our supplications. Amen.



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Subject Topic: Routines and habits-your thoughts? Post ReplyPost New Topic
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ann@home
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Posted: June 03 2007 at 9:16pm | IP Logged Quote ann@home

I feel like we have no routine or schedule that is really beneficial or conducive to a learning lifestyle. One one hand some might say no schedule is good since you can do whatever you want. I know this works for some.
But after 2 yrs of bumping along I feel that with a 2 yr old we need more routine for his sake and the benefit of learning.
My 5 yr old DD is now wanting to "do homeschool" which to her means sitting down and doing workbooks or a project. I think some type of routine would help her too to see that learning is just reading sometimes.
And my 8 yr old is such a day dreamer! Some days it can take him 2 hrs to do 2 pages of math (not because it's hard) and others he can be done in 20 minutes.
I hate to threaten that we won't go somewhere because his work is not done but we have had to do this.

I'm not talking about a rigid schedule, but more about some loose routines to take us thru our day in a more predictable manner.

So what were some methods you took to get into a routine. How long, on average, do you think it takes to establish a routine/habits so that they become a part of our day without me reminding them to do things? (at least not every day )

Thanks for your thoughts

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Becky Parker
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Posted: June 03 2007 at 9:39pm | IP Logged Quote Becky Parker

Ann,
Routines are definitely a must for us. My gang just seems to do better when they know what's coming in the day. One great concept that Leonie shared quite some time ago, was about "pegs" in your day. This has been wonderful for us. I'm sure she could describe it much better, but I would say it is like a routine without a schedule. "Pegs" are certain things that happen each day that the kids (and parents) can definitely rely on. The other stuff may change in between, but the pegs sort of hold everything together. <Please Leonie, or others who use a peg system jump in any time as I feel I am not doing it justice>!
Anyway for us the pegs are:
Morning prayer
Morning meeting
Learning room time
Lunch
Play time
Story / quiet time
Afternoon prayer time
Tea time
Chores
Dinner
Bed

I try to have a definite time during the day that these things happen, but I'm learning the actual time isn't as big of an issue as I have made it in the past. For instance, ideally we start our morning prayer at 9AM. That doesn't always happen, but my kids know that our day starts with prayer whether that be at 9 or at 11. Then we go from there.
This system provides the structure my children and I need but allows us to be flexible. I am a very "ducks-in-a-row" kind of person and I get stressed when we don't follow the various schedules I have created. I am learning though, by using this method, that the routine is more important than the schedule, and it allows those wonderful "learning moments" to happen when I would otherwise be saying "okay, nature study is over, we're moving onto Math" or whatever.
Hope this makes some sense. I don't feel as though I have done a very good job of explaining it!

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Leonie
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Posted: June 04 2007 at 5:41pm | IP Logged Quote Leonie

Becky, you did a great description of pegs!

Here is a blog post by Lissa on pegs.

Our current pegs are chores pegged to breakfast/computer/exercise/piano time - this is first thing in the morning.

Then, if it is a stay at home morning, the next peg is prayers and meeting to talk about our day.

Our mornings at home are always time to be together - formal work, reading, writing, etc. Then we know that lunch and after lunch are set aside for other things - newspaper delivery, work for me and the teens, homeschool activities, rabbit trails, more play, cooking.

And a clean up before dinner and family time and a clean up before bed.

There is a familiarity to these pegs and this routine and this helps children feel comfortable, ime.

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saintanneshs
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Posted: June 04 2007 at 6:08pm | IP Logged Quote saintanneshs

Becky Parker wrote:

This system provides the structure my children and I need but allows us to be flexible. I am a very "ducks-in-a-row" kind of person and I get stressed when we don't follow the various schedules I have created. I am learning though, by using this method, that the routine is more important than the schedule, and it allows those wonderful "learning moments" to happen when I would otherwise be saying "okay, nature study is over, we're moving onto Math" or whatever.
Hope this makes some sense. I don't feel as though I have done a very good job of explaining it!


I think you've done a great job, Becky!

I think, for me, the most helpful thing about schedules is actually taking the time to sit down and figure out what NEEDS to be accomplished each day for our home life to run smoothly. I find that if I sit down and put everything on paper, the actual "timeframes" I place everything in don't matter beyond the point of putting them on the paper. For me, just reaffirming where our pegs are and how everything else fits in around them is the main point. After all, I couldn't keep to set times for EVERYTHING if I tried!! (Well, maybe if my 2 year old and 4 month old were magically potty-trained and could climb on and off the toilet by themselves...)

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missionfamily
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Posted: June 06 2007 at 9:02am | IP Logged Quote missionfamily

One thing that really helps me re-prioritize and re-order when things are feeling out of whack is the book A Mother's Rule of Life...my "rule" looks something like this:
My morning routine:includes coffee, prayer, emptying the dishwasher, starting laundry, getting dressed, maing a list of phone calls, errands, etc..., taking out school/activity materials, getting babies changed and dressed (I try to accomplish this before the kids are up)
Kids morning routine: get dressed, make beds, bring down laundry, eat breakfast, brush teeth and hair
Morning chores
Prayer and saints story
Learning Time
Outside Time
Lunch
Quick Pick Up
Learning Time
Quiet Reading/Nap Time
Laundry folding and putting away
Tea Time or Out of the House errands
Outside Time--kids/Computer and phone calls--Mom
Kitchen time--Mom/Free time--kids
Dinner
Baths
Evening Prayer
Family Time
Bed--kids
Wine time--mom and dad (We don't always have wine..it's adult conversation, movie, prayer, visiting time...we make a commitment to do this for at least a half an hour after the kids are in bed, no matter how tired we are...even if we fall asleep talking or saying the rosary, we make time for us each day)...In addition, I make a commitment to pray or do spiritual reading when I am nursing the baby and the kids are outside, when I am in the car on an errand, and when I am in the shower or tub...when I am awake in the middle of the night, I put on EWTN.

Obviously with five kids under nine and a husband who works from home, I have to remember to stay flexible...but this outline for the day allows me take time for everything that's important without being overwhelmed by a mile long to-do list that never gets accomplished.

Colleen
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Tina P.
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Posted: June 07 2007 at 10:23am | IP Logged Quote Tina P.

missionfamily wrote:
Wine time--mom and dad (We don't always have wine..it's adult conversation, movie, prayer, visiting time...we make a commitment to do this for at least a half an hour after the kids are in bed, no matter how tired we are...even if we fall asleep talking or saying the rosary, we make time for us each day)...In addition, I make a commitment to pray or do spiritual reading when I am nursing the baby and the kids are outside, when I am in the car on an errand, and when I am in the shower or tub...when I am awake in the middle of the night, I put on EWTN.


This is beautiful, Colleen. It gets so much more difficult to take time for each other in the evenings as the children get older. Hold tightly to this tradition!

We try to get even our oldest (now almost 13) to bed ~ even if only to read for an hour ~ early enough for my husband who wakes at 4:30 a.m. and I to have some visiting time. We can't complete a rosary because that would take at least 15 minutes of uninterrupted time. We don't get that. Our oldest has to get a drink of water and discuss something with Dad. Then one of the youngest has to get a drink. Then, someone's stealing covers. Then, there's giggling from another corner of the house. And on and on, 'til finally, we give up, turn out the lights, and fall asleep ourselves.

Our schedule pegs are our meals. We have devotional time before breakfast. We clean up after breakfast and the kids have to complete math, spelling, and grammar (and sometimes Latin ... I'm not so great about enforcing that subject ) before lunch. After those three seatwork activities and still before lunch, we often read from history.

After lunch cleanup, there's play time, science study, which tends to be a more active pursuit. The kids have silent reading/project/writing time at this time as well to catch up on catechism, history, science logs, etc.

Post-dinner, we sometimes read aloud from literature and complete a family rosary. But the night sneaks up on us. What generally happens is that one of the parents herds the kids into bed while the other cleans up dinner. Even with the older kids helping, and even when we're not embroiled in a sports season this happens.

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